Wednesday, 28 March 2018

and in OTHER news...

This is Seville the Cat here, bringin' you Nova Scotia's most up-to-date and accurate news, direct to you from my desk here at Nerissa's Life.

MOUSES!

Reports are comin' in fast and furious, my friends.  They're comin' in fast and furious, for sure.

I'm told we've had a groundhog sighting on the corner of Commercial and Main.  Is there confirmation of the varmint's identity, Bob?  Do we know whether or not it's Sam?  Or is it some other varmint goin' by some other name?

ANOTHER one?  That's rights, folks.  You heard it here, first.  There's been ANOTHER groundhog sighting.  This one, over on Spring Garden Road.

Kinda ironic, when you think about it, considerin' those weather-forecastin' varmints are on the lam due to a lack of spring.

MOUSES!

Hold on...  Hold on...  Hold on everybody...  HOLD ON.

WE HAVE MORE REPORTS COMIN' IN.  They're comin' in so fast, I can barely keep up.  My claws are clickin' at record speeds.

What?

WHAT?

And we have confirmation on that?

MOUSES!

My friends, Mother Nature has been spotted, keepin' herself warm, drinkin' hot nip tea in an upscale bistro in the heart of downtown.

MOUSES!

And in OTHER news..

We still have snow.

MOUSES!

I don't know if you can hear what I'm hearin', my friends, but there are sirens off in the distance.  A whole lot of them, too.  They're gettn' closer and closer.

Do we have any reporters out at the scene?  DO WE?

AND WE HAVE ANOTHER VARMINT SIGHTIN'.

MOUSES!

This most recent sightin' is comin' from...

Uh....  Never mind.  This latest one appears to have been a false alarm.  Apparently, some peep wearin' brown fuzzy slippers went out to get the mornin' paper, slipped on a patch of ice, and fell headfirst into a snowbank.  Neighbours mistook his fuzzy slippered feet, flailin' about in the air, to be a furry ol' groundhog.

MOUSES!

Hold on, everybody!  HOLD on.

I'm told we have my sister Mason on the line, reportin' LIVE from outside the local courthouse, where the police have been badgerin' judges to issue a warrant for the arrest of Shubenacadie Sam,

What?  What?  What's that, Mason?  Badgers?  No, Sam isn't a badger.  He's a groundhog, for sure.

MOUSES!

Okay, we have it on good authority that a judge has just issued a warrant for the arrest of Shubenacadie Sam.

And Mother Nature, too?

MOUSES!

You heard it here first, my friends.  Arrest warrants have been issued for BOTH Shubenacadie Sam AND Mother Nature, herself, and...

You're breakin' up, Mason.  You're breakin' up.  What's that you're sayin'?

Shut.  The Litter Box.  Up.

MOUSES!

MOTHER NATURE IS OUT ON THE LAMB.

You mean the lam, there, don't you Sis?

No?  You mean she really has a flock of spring-lovin' lambs?

You mean she has KIDnapped a flock of spring-lovin' lambs?

And a bunch of baby goats, too?

MOUSES!

Accordin' to authorities, Mother Nature is also a person of interest in the investigation into a number of missing...

Of missin' spring flowers?

MOUSES!

Authorities are sayin' there isn't a crocus or primrose or snowdrop in sight.  Investigators are lookin' deeper into Mother Nature's whereabouts durin' the month of March, when the spring flowers were first noticed to be missin'.

MOUSES!

Well there you have it, my friends.  Mayhem has broken out all over our fair province of Nova Scotia.  Groundhogs are on the run and Mother Nature is on the lam, accompanied by a flock of  missin' lambs, and some kidnapped baby goats, too, not to mention those missin' spring flowers.

And in OTHER news...

THERE'S STILL SNOW.

MOUSES!

60 comments:

  1. We were so sorry to hear about your wonderful furry companion headed to the Bridge. May you have wonderful memories of that lovely soul.

    Abby Lab and the Johnson Family in Chicago

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    1. Thank you, my friends. We all miss her terribly. She was such a little cutie! So sweet and lovin', even though she had been born feral. purrs

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  2. Keep up the great work, your news reporting is superb. The cats here at Serenity would love to have a go and that Ground Hog!!!!!

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    1. We're trackin' him down! WE'RE TRACKIN' HIM DOWN! I'll let you know when we catch him. purrs

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  3. I know you can pull it off. We're very sorry to hear about Tobias, we understand and send hugs and all our love your way.

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    1. Thank you for your kind words, my friend. PURRS

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  4. Sam and Mother Nature better not come down to Massachusetts thinking they can hide out, my cat Jake and I are waiting for them. Spring better show up soon.

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    1. I'll send you a copy of their rap sheet, ASAP. MOUSES!

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  5. That sucks about the snow. I'm really sorry about Toby. Purrs to your family, Seville.

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  6. Hmm, if Mother Nature is up for all those crimes, do you think she’s responsible for the lack of nip seedlings? And what abouts all the nip mice 🐁 could that have been her sidekick Sam?
    Toodle pips
    Erin

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    1. I wouldn't be at all surprised. MOUSES! I'm gonna have to start investigatin' this new line of inquiries, for sure. MOUSES!!!

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  7. Another groundhog? Seems to me that the one that showed up a while back was definitely WRONG so maybe this new one will be a better predictor of Spring?????? We can only hope!

    Hugs, Teddy

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    1. Nope, it's the same one. We didn't hear 'bout him for a bit 'cause he was out on the lam. I think he might have been out on bail, too. MOUSES!

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  8. You are a great reporter!

    Purrs xx
    Athena and Marie

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  9. So sorry to hear about the passing of your sweet darling Tobias. Fly free beautiful Soul <3 <3 <3
    Soft Pawkisses to comfort you all <3

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  10. ♥♥ Godspeed your journey to heaven Tobias; we are truly sorry ~~~~ we sends hugs and loves to your family ♥♥♥♥♥ ~~~~~~~~~~ daisy, tuna, dude, sauce and boomer

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  11. dood....thiz post haz uz wunderin if thoz ground hogz noe de ground hogz HERE ??? coz...HERE.... they iz nothin BUT trubullz witha cap a tull Z...

    N speekin oh trubullz. mom naturez ina lot oh it with manee a folk...knot coz oh goatz N lambs N easturr harez...just bee coz her went a stray bek in feb.

    N we haz knot seen her sintz !!!! ♥♥♥☺☺☺

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    1. You think it could be a giant conspiracy? You think ALL the groundhogs could be involved? All of 'em gettin' together with Mother Nature and conspirin' to give fake forecasts? MOUSES!

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  12. I just read the news on POTP, I am so sorry for the loss of Tobias. XO

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    1. Thank you my friends. We miss Toby so much. purrs

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  13. Oh noes! Seville we’re sad to learn precious Tobias has dashed to The Bridge. Nissy will be welcoming her with open paws. Sending my best purrs for your Peeps cuz I know they loved her lots.

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    1. Thank you, Savvy. Yes, that's what Peep #1 says. She says that Nissy and Toby will be together again, rompin' through Heavenly nip fields, chasing butterflies. PURRS

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  14. I was very sad to hear about Tobias and send my condolences and hugs.
    This is very worrying news about all the groundhog sightings! They seem to be multiplying faster than rabbits.
    Mother Nature has made big mistakes here as well. She kept sending Spring throughout the winter, then when she had fooled all of my plants into coming into bud early she sent winter with snow, ice and freezing temperatures to kill most of them even though I had wrapped them up all snuggly.

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    1. Thank you for those kinds words, dear friends. We miss Toby a lot. purrs

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  15. Your a purrfect mews reporter Seville. Hugs and Purrs to you all. x

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  16. The only good groundhogs are the ones you find on your plate :)
    We're so sorry about Tobias, she was a sweetheart :)

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    1. She really was. She was such a little cutie. purrs

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  17. MOUSES! Those groundhog prognostications seem to be all over the map!

    We are so sorry that Tobias had to go to the Bridge. Please know we send you so much love, and purrs and prayers of comfort.

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  18. Hm... we think we don't wanna mess with Mother Nature. She's kinda scary when she's mad, we hear. But definitely go for the varmint, lock him up!!

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    1. Hmmm.. I was kinda hopin' they'd lock 'em up together! purrs

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  19. We are sorry to hear about Tobias, purrs and prayers.
    Have a peaceful weekend...

    Noodle and crew

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  20. Totally best post Seville!! Amazing!!!

    * hugs about your sisfur too *

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    1. Thank you, my friend. Thank you for thinking 'bout Toby, and thanks for the compliment, too. PURRS

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  21. Well that's REAL news to me, Severs. Humans where I live don't seem to know the difference between real news and fake news. Tee hee hee. Maybe I need to move to Nova Scotia.

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    1. Yeah, peeps can have a lot of trouble tellin' the difference. They're not smart like us cats. MOUSES!

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  22. So sorry for your loss, Pals <3 ((((((((^^)))))))) <3 Fly free, whole, healthy, and forever Loved, angel Tobias!
    As for those "varms", they'll keep you busy for awhile, we think!

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    1. Thank you, my friend. We miss her a whole lot. purrs

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  23. Layla woofs groundhogs !!!!!!!!! She loves putting her head into their holes to see if she can see them BOL. She is woofing now to go check for some in the dog park. Stay warm and hopefully soon there will no snow but lots of warm weather - WOOF !!!!

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    1. Hmmm... I wonder if any groundhogs have holes in my yard?

      AND I WONDER if I could be charging 'em rent! purrs

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  24. We still have snow as well. Did I ever tell you about the time I went down a groundhog den? Yeah Mom nearly had a heart attack. I mean now that I think back ... if it had been home... or I could have gotten stuck underground ... *shiver* but hey Chihuahua's are mousers so ... what did she expect?!! Great reporting!

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    1. Thanks so much! I try my best to report the facts well. Happy to hear you had no encounters of a groundhog kind when you went down that hole. purrs

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  25. I hope it warms up soon for you! Most of our snow melted last week, and then we got some more. Fortunately, it didn't stick. Mother Nature and the groundhogs need to stop causing trouble, and just let it be spring!

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    1. They sure do! Peep #1 finally brought her clove currants out of the garage the other day, but had to put 'em back in this afternoon. Gonna be -6C tonight, with a wind chill of -12C. MOUSES!

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  26. We could just picture that old lady going outside in brown fuzzy slippers. MOL! We do hope she was okay.

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    1. You should have seen it. I must admit, there was a bit of chucklin' goin' on at the news station. purrs

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  27. LOL I feel your frustration too! Snow finally melted here in the northeast NY/NJ suburbs areas. I think Spring is here...I think so. But mother nature has an interesting sense of humor so who knows!MOUSES!

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    1. Sense of humour my tail. We're havin' another cold snap tonight and I'm really not laughin'. purrs

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  28. Mouses!! what a great post. Mother Nature has been very inconsistent and unhelpful this year here in NC. When my horse is hanging on to his winter coat here in April, that is odd. (YAYDog Clare)

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    1. Your horse has a winter coat? Wow. Now is that the kinda fabric coat that doggies and peeps wear, or the kinda thicker fur coat we cats have? Peep #1 says she has seen horses wearin' the doggy/peep kind 'round here. purrs

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  29. Luckily spring has sprung here in North Georgia. The weather is warm and the flowers are blooming! I am loving the warmer weather here! Hopeful Mother Nature sends some your way soon!

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    1. You have flowers bloomin'? Ever lucky! Not even the daphne has bloomed yet, here. MOUSES!

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  30. Yes, Mother Nature and the groundhogs should be keeping a low profile! Hopefully some sightings of Spring on the horizon, soon. We're expecting freezing rain here in Ontario.

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    1. That's what I heard! You're in full storm watch mode, for sure. Stay safe! purrs

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