Sunday, 1 April 2018

the weasels who stole Easter

"WHAAHHH?" Seville cried, awaking with a start.  "What the mouses was that?"

"DID YOU HEAR THAT?" Mason yelled as she ran into the bedroom and slammed the door shut behind her.

"Shh!!!  You'll wake up the peep," Seville told his sister, "and I just got her to sleep."  Putting his paws over Peep #1's ears, he asked, "Did I hear what?"

"That noise.  It sounded like glass breaking," Mason answered.

"As a matter of fact, I think I did hear that.  I heard somethin', anyway.  Some kinda noise woke me up."

"I think someone is breaking into the house," Mason whispered.  "Seville, you and I need to check this out.  Come on," she beckoned.  "We need to check it out right now."

"FINE," grumbled Seville, and jumping down from the bed, he scampered after his sister.  Together, they headed downstairs.

Side by side, the two cats crept along the hallway until they were within a paws' reach of the living room door.  Mason put a paw to her mouth, and extending one claw, she silently reminded Seville to keep quiet.  She then pointed to the living room and mouthed the words, "They're. In. There."

The two cats peered around the corner of the door, and into the living room.  Their jaws dropped at the sight before them.  Several weasels were searching the room.  They were looking under the chesterfield and chairs, tossing throw pillows onto the floor, and even reaching behind the paintings on the walls.  In the dining area at the far end, a weasel could be seen rummaging around in the drawers of the buffet table, while another was lifting the corners of the area rug.

"What the mouses are they after?" whispered Seville to his sister.

Mason shrugged her shoulders.  "Nip?" she suggested.

"Well they're out of luck if it's nip mice they're after," said Seville.  "I slobbered over the last one in that room, yesterday afternoon.  Remind me to tell the peep we need her to knit up a few more."

Mason let out a little gasp.  "Look!  That weasel has found something on one of the dining room chairs."  She squinted so as to see what was in the weasel's hand.

Both Seville and Mason recognised the weasel's newly found treasure, immediately, and turned to face one another.  In unison, they cried, "THEY'RE STEALING OUR EGGS!"

A deathly silence emanated from the living room.  Having heard the cats in the hallway, the weasels stopped what they were doing, and listened intently.  Hearing nothing more, they went back to searching the room.

"They're stealing our eggs," the two cats cried again, this time whispering.

"Those are the eggs the Easter Bunny left for us."  Seville stomped a paw.  "For us CATS.  And they're stealing them all.  Those dirty rotten rascals...  MOUSES!"

"Shh..."  Mason reminded her brother, once more.  "They'll hear you.  We need to find out what they're planning to do with our nip eggs."

"They're probably gonna have a nip party or somethin', Sis.  They're probably gonna get nipped on OUR nip eggs."  Seville pressed his lips shut.  Catching his tongue between his teeth, he stopped himself from yelling out MOUSES!

"SHH..." Mason reminded her brother a second time.

"Wait a minute," murmured Seville.  "I have an idea.  Be right back," and he scampered off into the kitchen.  Moments later, Seville returned carrying a large egg.  Very carefully, he gently placed it on the floor in the middle of the hallway, just outside the living room door.

"Get back!" Mason urged.  "They're coming this way."

The two cats pressed their backs against the hallway wall.  Luckily, there were no lights on in the hall, allowing them to melt in the shadows.  They watched as seven weasels, each carrying a bulging sack of what appeared to be nip eggs, marched, single file, toward the front door.  The lead weasel bent down to pick up the egg Seville had left on the floor, and tossed it into the sack he was carrying.  Moments later, the front door slammed shut, and the weasels were gone.

"MOUSES!" cried Seville, loudly this time, no longer having to conceal his presence.

"Mouses, indeed," Mason murmured.  Turning to her brother, she calmly stated, "Seville, you and I are going to go get our nip eggs back."

"Maybe we should just phone the police," suggested Seville.  "There are seven of them, and only two of us."

"And like the police are really going to believe two cats calling in the middle of the night about a gang of weaselly bandits stealing nip eggs left by the Easter Bunny."

"Hmmm...  You might have a point there, Sis.  Weasels stealing eggs does sound kinda fanciful, doesn't it?"

"Come on."  Mason grabbed Seville by a paw, and dragged him toward the front door.  Once out on the veranda, they spotted what they recognized as the Weasel Syndicate's getaway van, heading down their street at top speed."

"I KNEW IT!" Seville cried.  "I knew the Syndicate was behind this, for sure."

"COME ON, THEY'RE GETTING AWAY!" yelled Mason.  Still holding Seville by the paw, she started after the weasel's van at a trot.

"Mason..." and Seville dug his back paws into the ground.  "We can't catch up to their van on paw.  We need to..."

Mason spun on her heels.  "Don't be such a negative nelly, Sivvers.  No one would ever get ANYTHING done if they gave up before even trying."

Reluctantly, Seville got to his paws.  "FINE.  But I still say..."

At that moment, the Weasel Syndicate's van came careening back down the street and toward the cats' house.

"Well would you look at that," whistled Seville.  "You think they've had a change of heart and are returnin' our nip eggs?"

"No...  Why would they?"  Mason looked puzzled.

The van screeched to a halt at the end of the cats' driveway.  All four doors opened at once, and weasels came piling out, coughing and sputtering, gasping for air.

"What on Earth?" Mason cried.

Seville smiled a wide smile from ear to ear, and light from the streetlamp sparkled as it bounced off his upper fangs.

The head weasel marched over to the cats, tossing down his sack of eggs at their paws.  "And I suppose you think this is funny!" he cried.

Seville chuckled.  "Actually, uh..  Yeah.  As a matter of fact, I do."  He held onto his tummy and roared with laughter.

"OUR WHOLE VAN REEKS!" the weasel yelled.

Mason looked puzzled.  "Sivvers, what did you do?"

"WHAT DID HE DO?" cried the weasel.


"Yeah, what did he do?"  Mason looked from the weasel to Seville, and back to the weasel again.

"Heheheheheee..." laughed Seville, clapping his front paws together with delight.  Grabbing the weasel's sack, he peered inside and gave it a little sniff.  "Everythin' seems in order here.  Where did you put it?"

"Where did he put what?" asked Mason, still confused about what was going on.

"It's in the van," grumbled the weasel.  "It fell out onto the van floor."

"And did it break when it fell?" asked Seville.

"You know perfectly well that it did, Cat," the weasel spat.  "Why else would we have returned?"

"Why else, indeed," smirked Seville.

"WHAT THE MOUSES IS GOING ON?" Mason yelled.

"Sorry, Sis," Seville apologised.  "I guess I should fill you in.  Remember that egg I left on the floor in the hallway?"

Mason nodded.

"And do you remember those eggs Peep #1 found way at the back of the fridge, the other day?  You know, the ones she had forgotten about?  The ones from Easter, LAST year?  The ones she didn't know how to get rid of?"

"Oh yeah..." and now it was Mason's turn to smile.  "I remember those."  She slapped Seville on  the back.  "Good one, Seville."

"I know, right?" and Seville gave his sister a high paw.

"WHO'S GOING TO PAY TO DESTINKIFY OUR VAN?" the weasel yelled.  "IT REEKS FROM TOP TO BOTTOM!"

Mason pursed her lips together.  "It does, does it?  Well that's somewhat unfortnate."  She placed her front paws on her hips and stomped a paw.  "You weasels shouldn't be breaking into houses and stealing cats' nip eggs.  Maybe you'll learn a lesson from this."

Seville leaned over and whispered in his sister's ear.  "Not likely, Sis.  Weasels aren't too bright, you know.  They're not like us cats."

"True," agreed Mason, before turning back to the weasel.  "I want each and every one of the nip eggs you stole, returned right now.  Come on.  COME ON.  Time's a wasting!" and she snapped her claws together, inches from the weasel's nose.

"You go, girl," Seville told Mason.  "I'll go re-hide this bag of nip eggs.  Those two long-haired marmie freak brothers of ours will be awfully disappointed if they don't get to hunt for eggs on Easter mornin', you know."  He turned, and as he headed inside the house, he called back to his sister, "Have the weasels leave the rest of our eggs on the veranda, okay?  I'll come get 'em once this first lot is hidden."

"I SAID, TIME'S A WASTING!" Mason again yelled at the weasel, who was still standing in the same spot, watching with dismay as Seville headed indoors.  "GO GET THOSE EGGS, AND GO GET THEM NOW," Mason cried, practically pushing the weasel toward his van.

"BUT WHO'S GOING TO PAY TO DESTINKIFY OUR VAN?" the weasel again cried.

"The same weasel who broke a rotten egg on the van floor, I would think," answered Mason.  She snapped her claws once more.  "Go get those nip eggs, I said."

"But..."

"Shall I go see if I can rummage up another rotten egg or two from the back of the fridge?" Mason asked.


"No.  No...   NO!  that won't be necessary."  The weasel gulped, hard.  "You cats may have won, this time, but..."

"But?" asked Mason, daring the weasel to continue.

"But nothing," answered the weasel, half swallowing his words.

Mason grinned.  "Feel free to cry MOUSES! if you so desire."

The weasel turned and grumbled as he stomped toward his van.  "Outwitted by a couple of cats...  On Easter morning...  MOUSES!"


46 comments:

  1. Well done Seville. Those pesky weasels will think twice next time before they go pilfering your nip eggs.

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  2. Way to go, ya done good. Now, you need to work on the van. HHappy Easter from all of us!

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    1. Nope, no sirree. That van cleanup needs to be done by those weasels, themselves. How else are they gonna learn? When you think about it, I'm kinda doin' them a favour. purrs

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  3. Oh! My Cod! That was the best adventure EVER!!! Mr Seville, I would so like to be like you when I am older! Beating Weasels...You ROCK!!!
    ♫♪♥♥♥♥♫♪Happy Easter to all of you from us♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥
    Purrs and Love
    Marv and Mom

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    1. Awww... You're makin' me blush! Happy Easter Marv! You are MARVELOUS, for sure. PURRS

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  4. Kittehs for the WIN! Great job, everyone. We are so proud.

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    1. Yup, we won that won, for sure. But you know weasels.. They'll be back. Hmm... MOUSES!

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  5. Ha ha! You got a weasel to say MOUSES! Well done, Sivvers. The stink in that van will make those sneaky petes think twice from now on. :)

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    1. I sure do hope so. But if not, I still have the rest of those eggs. Hehehehe... purrs

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  6. I wonder if those were the same weasels I saw over at the Blessing of the Animals.

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    1. You saw weasels at the Blessing of the Animals? Hmmm.. Were they drivin' a stinky ol' van? purrs

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  7. And another excellent adventure! Great one, Seville and Mason.

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  8. Those Wiley Weasels deserve everything they got coming to them and we are glad it was you, Seville and with Mason’s help too that you defeated them with hardly any effort. However, I believe that they are just dumb enough and sneaky enough to try again another day. Keep your eyes open and your whiskers a twitchin, but I’m sure you will always win over the likes of them.

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    1. You're absolutely right. They really ARE dumb enough to try to trick me again. Those weasels.... MOUSES!

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  9. Now that was smart thinking, Seville. What an enquiring cat such as myself wants to know is.... how big IS that fridge of yours if you lost some eggs for a whole year!? AND do you have any extra extra mature cheese now too?
    Toodle pips and purrs
    ERin

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    1. Hmmm... I'll have to check on the cheese. Peep #1 accidentally pushed the egg carton right to the back, behind a couple jars of pickled onions. She HATES those. MOUSES!

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  10. Pawsome....paws up to you Seville and Mason for saving The Nip Eggs. Have a Happy Cracking Easter.xπŸ‡πŸ˜»πŸ˜»πŸΎπŸΎ

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    1. Happy "Cracking" Easter...

      Happy "CRACKING" Easter...

      I LOVE THAT!

      And you have a Happy Cracking Easter, too! purrs

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  11. Well done Seville, you pulled off the best retribution pawsible!

    Enjoy your nip eggs.

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  12. Well it sure surfs them right those thieving, stinkin' weaslie weasles. I'm glad you put your foot down, Mason! You and Severs saved Easter! Woot Woot!

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    1. Someone had to do it, right? Those weasels HAD to be taught a lesson, for sure. MOUSES1

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  13. Sorry your eggs got stolen by those weasles!

    Purrs xx
    Athena and Marie

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    1. But we got 'em back! And those weasels got a super stinky one in return. PURRS.

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  14. I am glad you outsmarted those darn weasels. Good Job!

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    1. Not hard to do, actually. I mean.. THEY'RE WEASELS! purrs

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  15. Those weasels got their up-commence fur-sure. Great idea Seville and Mason you were the cat on duty too. Happy Nip Egg Easter friends!
    Timmy and Family

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    1. Did the Easter Bunny bring you and your fur-sibs nip eggs, too? purrs

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  16. Most excellent adventure Mason and Seville. High paws for takin' care of those sneaky weasels

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  17. Weasels are just ... weasels!!! Nothing good comes from them.

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    1. How true.. How TRUE. Nothin' good EVER comes from Weasels and that, my friends, is for sure. MOUSES!

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  18. I just love your stories. Since I was a child I have loved reading books and stories about cats! Way to go you two! I almost feel sorry for the weasels they surely are embarrassed!

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    1. They're not just stories, my friend. This actually happened! Kinda.. Sorta.. You know.. PURRS.

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  19. I am laughing here so so much - good for both of you for catching them and getting your nip eggs back, sneaky weasels

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    1. Weasels ARE sneaky. I think Sneaky is their middle name. MOUSES!

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  20. MOL!! Oh my CAT Seville, you really caught them Unfair and Unsquare * giggle * WooHOOOOO pawsome work!!!

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  21. What a great story! I'm glad the weasels got what they deserved!

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    1. And do you know what they DIDN'T deserve? OUR NIP EGGS, is what. MOUSES!

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  22. Now that's an adventure! Happy Belated Easter, and pawesome work! We loved this!

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    1. I'm super pleased to hear you liked it and.. HAPPY BELATED EASTER to you, too! PURRS.

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  23. Cats are so smart and this story is spellbinding...the mystery of the sulphuric egg...bet mom is glad to be rid of that!

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    1. She sure was! And NOW to get rid of the other eleven. MOUSES!

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