Sunday, 18 November 2018

stupid peeps

I'm tellin' ya, peeps can be SO stupid.

If I've said it once, I've said it a BILLION AND EIGHTY-SIX times.

It's like they think they're in a competition or somethin'.

A competition to see who's the most stupid, that is.

MOUSES!

And believe it or not, I'm not necessarily talking 'bout MY peeps.

Oh, they're stupid, alright.  And believe-you-me, if they were in a competition of the stupids, MY peeps would win, paws down, for sure.

MOUSES!

But other peeps can be super stupid, too.

Why just the other day...

Actually, I don't even WANNA THINK about what happened the other day.

But facts are facts, and the fact is, it did happen, so...

Okay, so for example, a kitty calls 9-1-1 to report the theft of a missin' nip plant, and what does a kitty get?

I'LL tell you what a kitty gets.  A kitty gets in big time trouble, for sure.

MOUSES!

It's not like it wasn't an emergency.

Oh sure, they SAID it wasn't an emergency, but WHAT THE MOUSES DO THEY know?

I mean...

I mean, a missin' nip plant is a missin' nip plant, and a missin' nip plant IS a BIG TIME EMERGENCY, for sure.

And the fact that the nip plant was later found...

MEANS ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN' AT ALL.

MOUSES!

You know, if a peep is gonna move a kitty's nip plants about, A PEEP SHOULD TELL said kitty they're movin' his nip plants about...

BEFORE said kitty calls 9-1-1.

And ESPECIALLY if said kitty is a little high on the nip, himself.

MOUSES!

Besides, I'm petty sure that when my missin' nip plant was eventually found, it was missin' a few of its leaves.

Yeah, that's right, SOMEONE HAS BEEN SMOKIN' MY NIP.

MOUSES!

Okay, so I don't know that anyone was actually smokin' it, on account of my not knowin' any peeps 'round here who smoke, but...

BUT THEY COULD HAVE BEEN MAKIN' BROWNIES.

MOUSES!

This legalised human nip thing is WRECKIN' HAVOC on the Canadian catnip supply.

PEEPS DON'T HAVE A CLUE AS TO WHAT THEY'RE DOIN', for sure.

Not that they ever did.

Know what they're doin', I mean.

'Cause you know, peeps can be...

Well...

Well peeps can be super stupid, for sure.

And if I've said it once, I've said it a BILLION AND EIGHTY-SEVEN times.

MOUSES!