Sunday, 24 October 2021

eighty-four weeks

Now that is interestin', that is.  Yup, that's very interestin', for sure.


MOUSES!


You know, my bein' stuck here now for like four hundred and fifty-seven million, two hundred and twenty-eight thousand, eight hundred cat seconds; has given me the opportunity to do a lot of reflecting and stuff.  Durin' these past eighty-four weeks, I've been thinkin' a lot.  Thinkin' and reflectin', and reflectin' and thinkin', and...


And observin', too, of course.


And sometimes - quite often, as a matter of fact - I spend my days thinking and reflecting about the myriad of things I observe.


MOUSES!


Why just the other day...


Just the other day, I witnessed one of the strangest things I've ever observed.  Out there on the street, right in front of my house, I OBSERVED two big doggies bein' walked by their peep.  I wasn't scared or anythin' like that.  The doggies were out on the road, well away from my house, and they were attached to their peep by their leashes.  I know from experience that very rarely does a doggie run after a kitty when attached to its peep by a leash.


Peeps can't keep up, you see.


MOUSES!


But anyway...


But anyway, what I observed was rather odd, indeed.  One of the doggies squatted down like he was gonna do a poopies or somethin' like that, and the next thing I knew, he did!  Now that in itself wasn't weird.  When a dog has to poop, a dog has to poop.  Just like us cats, I suppose.


But...


But after the doggie was done, his peep pulled a little plastic baggie out of her pocket, bent down, and scooped those poopies right up.


And then...


And then she carried 'em home like she had won some kinda prize!


MOUSES!


I know, I know...  I know what you're thinkin'.  You're thinkin', peeps are supposed to clean up after their dogs.  And you know somethin'?  YOU WOULD BE RIGHT!


But the thing is, in all my nine lives, I've never actually witnessed it happenin'.


MOUSES!


Talk about a helicopter mom!


I mean, she watched carefully as her doggy did his thing, hoverin' over him like any good helicopter mom would, then got right in there with the poop bag as swiftly as a gull swoopin' down for a fish.


MOUSES!


And it made me wonder 'bout my peep and the litterbox.  


NO, Peepers doesn't use my litterbox.


Not that I know of, anyway.


MOUSES!


Peepers has always been one to swoop in and clean up the litter, but she's never actually hovered over me whilst I was in the process of doin' my business.  And I don't think I'd like her to start.


I mean...


I mean, a kitty likes his privacy while usin' the loo.


Dogs, though?  Well apparently dogs will poop out in the open.  Out on the street!  With everyone watchin', the...


Wait for it...


Poop show.


MOUSES!


I don't think I'd like that, one bit.  After all, we kitties have a sense of what's suitable for doin' in public places.  What's suitable for public viewin'!  More importantly, we cats know what SHOULD be done in the privacy of one's own home, away from the pryin' eyes of every Tom, Dick, and Harry; not to mention the ever present paparazzi.


We cats have a sense of propriety.


You know, that sorta thing.


Oh my.  Oh my goodness!  All this talkin' of poopin' has...


Excuse me whilst I go use the box with the litter.


No Peepers, your assistance is NOT required.


MOUSES!



***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.