and in OTHER news...

This is Seville the Cat here, bringin' you Nova Scotia's most up-to-date and accurate news, direct to you from my desk here at Nerissa's Life.

MOUSES!

Reports are comin' in fast and furious, my friends.  They're comin' in fast and furious, for sure.

I'm told we've had a groundhog sighting on the corner of Commercial and Main.  Is there confirmation of the varmint's identity, Bob?  Do we know whether or not it's Sam?  Or is it some other varmint goin' by some other name?

ANOTHER one?  That's rights, folks.  You heard it here, first.  There's been ANOTHER groundhog sighting.  This one, over on Spring Garden Road.

Kinda ironic, when you think about it, considerin' those weather-forecastin' varmints are on the lam due to a lack of spring.

MOUSES!

Hold on...  Hold on...  Hold on everybody...  HOLD ON.

WE HAVE MORE REPORTS COMIN' IN.  They're comin' in so fast, I can barely keep up.  My claws are clickin' at record speeds.

What?

WHAT?

And we have confirmation on that?

MOUSES!

My friends, Mother Nature has been spotted, keepin' herself warm, drinkin' hot nip tea in an upscale bistro in the heart of downtown.

MOUSES!

And in OTHER news..

We still have snow.

MOUSES!

I don't know if you can hear what I'm hearin', my friends, but there are sirens off in the distance.  A whole lot of them, too.  They're gettn' closer and closer.

Do we have any reporters out at the scene?  DO WE?

AND WE HAVE ANOTHER VARMINT SIGHTIN'.

MOUSES!

This most recent sightin' is comin' from...

Uh....  Never mind.  This latest one appears to have been a false alarm.  Apparently, some peep wearin' brown fuzzy slippers went out to get the mornin' paper, slipped on a patch of ice, and fell headfirst into a snowbank.  Neighbours mistook his fuzzy slippered feet, flailin' about in the air, to be a furry ol' groundhog.

MOUSES!

Hold on, everybody!  HOLD on.

I'm told we have my sister Mason on the line, reportin' LIVE from outside the local courthouse, where the police have been badgerin' judges to issue a warrant for the arrest of Shubenacadie Sam,

What?  What?  What's that, Mason?  Badgers?  No, Sam isn't a badger.  He's a groundhog, for sure.

MOUSES!

Okay, we have it on good authority that a judge has just issued a warrant for the arrest of Shubenacadie Sam.

And Mother Nature, too?

MOUSES!

You heard it here first, my friends.  Arrest warrants have been issued for BOTH Shubenacadie Sam AND Mother Nature, herself, and...

You're breakin' up, Mason.  You're breakin' up.  What's that you're sayin'?

Shut.  The Litter Box.  Up.

MOUSES!

MOTHER NATURE IS OUT ON THE LAMB.

You mean the lam, there, don't you Sis?

No?  You mean she really has a flock of spring-lovin' lambs?

You mean she has KIDnapped a flock of spring-lovin' lambs?

And a bunch of baby goats, too?

MOUSES!

Accordin' to authorities, Mother Nature is also a person of interest in the investigation into a number of missing...

Of missin' spring flowers?

MOUSES!

Authorities are sayin' there isn't a crocus or primrose or snowdrop in sight.  Investigators are lookin' deeper into Mother Nature's whereabouts durin' the month of March, when the spring flowers were first noticed to be missin'.

MOUSES!

Well there you have it, my friends.  Mayhem has broken out all over our fair province of Nova Scotia.  Groundhogs are on the run and Mother Nature is on the lam, accompanied by a flock of  missin' lambs, and some kidnapped baby goats, too, not to mention those missin' spring flowers.

And in OTHER news...

THERE'S STILL SNOW.

MOUSES!

dreamin' of spring flowers

He has two days to get outta here.  Two more days to get lost and that's that.  I'm not givin' him any more time.  He has had enough.  More than enough.  I've had it with him and that's a fact, for sure.  MOUSES!

You're probably all wonderin' exactly who has overstayed their welcome around here.  Would it be...  Nosey-Neighbour-Cat?  Nope.  Haven't seen that ol' NNC in ages and even if I had, NNC is - and always will be - far more welcome than the one of whom I speak.  Or should that be write?  Blog?  Whatever.

Anywho...  I'm talkin' about that Ol' Man Winter.  I've had it with him.  Had it up to my ears!

Okay, I know...  Bein' a cat and all, my ears aren't very high but you get my point, I am sure. MOUSES!

The calendar says that in two days time, it's supposed to be the first day of spring so I'm givin' Ol' Man Winter exactly two days to pack up his bags and get outta town.  I want him gone.  GONE, I say.  I want him here no more.

And if he doesn't go?  Why then I'm gonna...

Truth be told, I haven't actually thought quite that far ahead but whatever I do, it'll be somethin' that'll have Ol' Man Winter shakin' in his boots, for sure.  His winter boots and all.  MOUSES!

I've been pretty sick and tired of that ol' man for quite some time now but this week was the final straw.  A week before spring and what does he do?  He slams us with not one - but TWO - winter storms in just a few days.  The whole province is under a winter storm warnin' for the second time this week.  MOUSES!

I was finally beginnin' - just beginnin', mind you - to be able to see above the mound of snow outside my office window.  I was finally beginnin' to be able to see traces of movement out there on the road.  Keep track of the dogs out walkin' their peeps and whatnot.  But after this second storm, that ol' mountain of white stuff is just as high now as it was before.  Again I must say, MOUSES!

I heard that in the month of February, Ol' Man Winter dumped over five feet of the white stuff on us, here in the valley. That was on top of a whole whack of snow in January and now in March, here we are, gettin' more.  Over a foot, I think, on Sunday and there must have been at least that much again, today.  In fact, it's still snowin' right now.  Or maybe it's just blowin'.  I can't really tell.  IT'S LIKE A BLIZZARD OUT THERE.

Miss Spring had better arrive on Friday.  She had better be on time.  She had better get her schedule straight.

Sure do hope she's not takin' a plane to get here.  Flights in and out of the airport have been delayed and cancelled all over the place due to the winter storm.  MOUSES!  That Ol' Man Winter is up to his tricks, again.

Anywho...  Miss Spring is gonna have to dig her way out of a snow pile or somethin' and she had better do so very, very soon.  I'm hopin' that if I give Ol' Man Winter the winter boot first thing on Friday mornin', Miss Spring will show her face by afternoon.  I've got all four paws crossed that she will but don't worry, I know better than to cross all four of my paws all at once while standin' up.  I learned that lesson the hard way and that's enough said on that subject, I should think.

And here in the house, Peep #1 has been thinkin' that Miss Spring has already arrived.  Apparently, the peep hasn't looked out any windows recently.  Oh yeah, she can't 'cause they're all covered with snow.  But if she could, one look out there and she'd know that spring is nowhere to be found.

In my sunroom, occupyin' prime sunpuddle territory, are pots of sweet peas and wallflowers and a few other things.  I think the peep was plannin' on puttin' them out on the deck this month durin' the warmer days, gettin' them ready for plantin' outside in early May. Well that's not gonna happen.  Deck still has several feet of snow on it and that ol' snow isn't plannin' on goin' anywhere, anytime soon.

I wonder if I packed Ol' Man Winter's bags with snow if he'd take some of the white stuff with him.  It's a thought. Can't think of a reason not to try. Wonder where he keeps his bags.  Hmmm....

And I haven't really been helpin' matters much.  I've kinda been encouragin' the peep to think all things spring 'cause I finally found a source for the peep's favourite pansies and put in my order so that I could give her a package of seed for Peep Day.  Well technically it's called Mother's Day but Peep #1 isn't my mama.  My mama was a lovely long-haired tuxie girl and my peep is no tuxie cat. The peep is...  Well...  Well she's just a peep.  So Peep Day, it is.

I had to work long and hard findin' those pansy seeds for Ol' Peepers.  Place where the peep used to get 'em stopped sellin' them so I had to do some investigatin', on-line.  Good thing I have good investigative skills, for sure.

Peep #1's favourite pansies are called Blue Frost and they're really pretty.  I remember when she grew 'em before.  The petals were snow white with cute little faces and edged in lovely shades of blue.  The blues went beautifully with my sterling silver - some say platinum - tabby fur.  Perfect pansies for my peep to grow.  Perfect pansies for me to pose with for picture takin', too.

And speakin' of pictures, that's exactly what I intended to do.  I had intended to allow the peep to take my picture while I posed in and amongst some pretty spring flowers.  I intended to cooperate with the peep.  Cooperation, on my part, for picture takin' is somethin' I very rarely do.  Problem is, all the spring flowers are still stuck under all that snow and goodness knows when they'll get out. What is a kitty to do?  MOUSES!

So for now I'll just have to sit back and dream of the days when the spring flowers will bloom.  Pansies and wallflowers and lilies-of-the-valley, too. And primroses!  We mustn't forget the primroses, for sure.

One day, once Miss Spring has settled in, she'll breath upon the earth and bring the spring flowers to life.  One day...

Gosh, I had best get the guest bedroom ready and in ship-shape.  Get the sheets changed and whatnot for Miss Spring's arrival.  She'll need someplace to sleep and quite frankly, right now, it's stinkin' of that Ol' Man Winter, for sure.  MOUSES!