Of all the nerve...
OF ALL THE NERVE...
My gosh that peep is rude.
I know, I know... I know what you're thinkin'. You're thinkin', some peep has been rude to MY peep. And you know what?
You would be wrong.
While it's true that some peep MIGHT have been rude to my peep, I try not to concern myself with such mundane matters. Peepers has gotta learn to stand up for herself, you see, and what better way for her to stand up for herself than to stand up to peeps who would be rude?
No, rude peeps are only of a concern to me when they're bein' rude to me and the fact of the matter is, MY peep was incredibly rude to me early this mornin'. She was rude to Saffy, too, but you know... Stuff happens.
So how was ol' Peepers rude to Saffron and me, you ask?
Well she wasn't so much rude as she was...
Nope, she was rude.
Okay, so I'll tell you what happened. I asked Peepers a question and she up and left the room.
Can you believe it?
Okay, so TECHNICALLY she was actually already on her way outside when I was askin' her the question, and it is quite possible she didn't hear me ask it, but still...
The real problem is, Peepers was in a foul mood this mornin'. Foul as foul can be. Foul as a hen house full of chickens, she was.
Apparently we had a visitor last night. Maybe two. Maybe three! And you know what? You know what those visitors did?
Well they didn't bring me prezzies and THAT is rude, too.
And not only did they not bring me, Seville the Cat, a prezzie, they left behind a right ol' mess. The bird feeder hangin' from the veranda was down on the ground; empty of all its seed AND, turns out, the metal cord thingy from which it hangs has been broken beyond repair.
Yeah, when Peepers re-filled the knocked down feeder only to discover it couldn't be hung up again, she stomped off in ANOTHER rage, for sure.
And the metal stand thingy with all the hooks, the one in the middle of the front lawn, was also knocked down; but Peepers managed to get it back up, even though one of the prong leg thingies was all bent out of shape.
That made her foulness all the more foul, if you can believe she could get even fouler.
Oh, and the two acorn feeders hangin' from said metal stand thingy with all the hooks? The two acorns that are Peepers' very favourite bird-feeders of all time on account of their bein' so cute?
Well one she found halfway across the lawn.
And the other one...
The other one...
THE OTHER ONE...
THE OTHER ONE looks like it was trampled by a stampede, is completely bent out of shape - like Peepers, herself, I believe - and is totally, utterly, unreservedly unusable and unfillable, not to mention useless, to be sure.
Yup, the thing is as flat as a pancake, she said.
And just who were these visitors, you ask? And ask you might, on account of my havin' asked the very same question, although an answer I did not get.
Yeah, that was about the time Peepers so rudely stomped outta the house.
Well my first guess was a neighbour. Some of 'em have found out they appear in my book - YES, I am still workin' on that - and are none-too-pleased 'bout the fact, you see.
But then I thought, why would a neighbour wanna give me EVEN MORE fodder for my book? That would be stupid beyond belief.
So then I thought perhaps it was an alien workin' on crop circles who took a wrong turn.
But that made no sense once I rethunk it.
Then rocky raccoons came to mind. They've had their eyes on those bird feeders for a while now. But could a raccoon, even a chubby one, squish a metal acorn feeder like that?
So now I'm wonderin'...
NOW I'M WONDERIN'...
NOW I'M WONDERIN' if it was that big ol' bear some peeps have seen wanderin' about. Could that bear have been visitin' my house late last night?
WHY THE MOUSES DIDN'T HE BRING ME PREZZIES? ARE BEARS NOT TAUGHT PROPER ETIQUETTE WHEN THEY'RE YOUNG?
Who the mouses goes to dinner at someone's house without bringin' a gift for the host!
Of all the nerve.
A little bottle of nip wine would have been nice.
IF IN DOUBT,
DON'T. GO. OUT.
Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures
AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.
Remember to mask up, too.
Remember to mask up, too.
You'll just have to grin and bear it Seville, or raccoon it!ReplyDelete
Around here, Savvy, the raccoons can indeed bend the poles that hold the feeders over . Don't know about them stomping the feeder flat, but they can dismantle and scatter them too ! So we hope you don't have bears either. Although raccoons are no picnic.ReplyDelete
Seville, looks like you may need to call out the po po, to have an investigation as to whom robbed y'all last night!ReplyDelete
Someone definitely needs to start teaching bears some manners. 2 days ago we had one take down the hummingbird feeder and it bent the Shepard's hook it was hanging on. If they want to steal food they need to be less destructive.ReplyDelete
WAIT!!?!? You hve a BEAR rading your seed feeders THAT is shocking Sville!!!ReplyDelete
MOUSES! Those were some rude visitors, for sure, Sivvers!ReplyDelete
::but, um, we're not going to tell them, omn account of they're bears and all...::
Seville, We are all agog at the Mystery! While We were reading, We thought maybe you had had a storm. But - a Bear? Do you really think that might be the answer? Oooh, that is Scary!ReplyDelete
The bear faced cheek of the bear! Smash and grab and chew raid on your bird feeder! Maybe next time point them to the 7-11 store, or the neighbours that appear in your book, let them feed the bear. It would certainly give them somethings else to think about and you something extra fun to out in book 2! ;)ReplyDelete
Bears crushed that feeder?? Well, they do give tight bear hugs, so maybe they could. Scary to have bears that close to the house, though.ReplyDelete