Wednesday 14 October 2020

not fair

 


It's not fair, I tell you.  IT'S NOT FAIR!


Did you hear me there, Peepers?  DID YOU HEAR ME?  Were your ancient, old-as-the-hills-and-various-extinct-species-of-dinosaur ears capable of hearin' what I said?


IT'S NOT FAIR!


Awww...   MOUSES!


It's a BEAUTIFUL day out there...


Okay, so it's a little dreary and the ground is still wet from last night's rain and the weatherpeeps are sayin' we might have boomies this afternoon, but...


BUT RIGHT NOW, THE SUN IS SHININ' ON AND OFF AND THE TEMPERATURE IS SUPER DUPER MILD AND...


And that, my friends, is a beautiful day.


'Specially for October in Canada.


MOUSES!


But you know what?


Well I'll tell you what's what.  I'll tell you what's what right now.


I, SEVILLE THE CAT, CAN'T GO OUTSIDE.


MOUSES!


And WHY?


Good question.  In fact, I asked ol' Peepers that very same question, myself, a few minutes ago but her OLD-AS-THE-HILLS EARS had selective hearin' and I got NOTHIN' but grief for my troubles.


She says...


Get this - 


There are rockies in the backyard.


MOUSES!


Rockies.  In MY yard.  Interruptin' my beautiful day.


MOUSES!


But...  But...  But...  But what's a couple rocky raccoons?  We have a big backyard.  I know how to share!


What's more, I KNOW to stay away from 'em.  Just 'cause peeps don't know how to keep their distance from others doesn't mean we cats don't.


MOUSES!


They're just lookin' for snacks, Peepers.  They're bulkin' up for winter and tryin' to eat as much as they can.


You know, like you, when...


WHAT?  What did I say?  Don't blame ME for tellin' the truth.  I saw that bag of potato chips.


And FYI, Peepers, Family Size means for a FAMILY.  A family of more than one.


MOUSES!


And it's not like raccoons and cats are natural born enemies, anyway.  We have an agreement, you see.  We each keep to our own, and don't bother one another one bit.


WE KNOW HOW TO SOCIAL DISTANCE.


Peeps could take a lesson from that.


MOUSES!


AND...


AND MAYBE...


MAYBE those rockies are wantin' some of your chips.


EVER THINK ABOUT THAT?


There, that's settled then.  Peepers, you go give that rocky family your FAMILY SIZED bag of chips, and while they're busy munchin' on those I can go outside and enjoy my beautiful day.


MOUSES!


 ***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.



9 comments:

  1. Aww, man, Seville!
    Peepers ain't no fun...

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  2. We have some of Rocky's family in our backyard from time to time and the ferals don't care for them, they're huge!

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  3. I dunno, raccoons can be dangerous! I think your human should chase them away so you can have some outside time, though.

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  4. Um, are they raccoons in your backyard, Sivvers. Or is Peepers saying there are, like, Canadian Mounted Rockies in you backyard???

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  5. Mrs H once ate five children! OK she didnt eat five children, not even one, but she ate five child size packs of cheesy puffs! OK, so the bags weren't actually the sixe of children but they were for children! Anyways, what you need, Seville, is your own programable cat flap, or whisk device, to take you to whole new racoon free places – maybe like the potato chip factory?!
    Purrs
    ERin

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  6. dood....we could agreez with peeperz that itz best ta stay a way frum em til they moove on....even if they DUE wear a mask ;) ☺☺♥♥

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  7. The thing with social distancing with Rockies is that they may not follow the best way to do that Seville. Better safe than... lunch or crunch

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  8. You best be careful. Raccoons can be mean.

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  9. A rocky showed up on my porch a couple of times during the summer. He was as big as the Basset Hound, but didn't have an odor or drool like the doggy does. I think I'd prefer the rocky for a roommate. Tee hee hee.

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.