Sunday 2 August 2020

twenty weeks

Don't get any ideas, Peepers.  DON'T GET ANY IDEAS.  DON'T EVEN THINK 'BOUT BRINGIN' HIM HOME!

I'm tellin' ya...

PEEPS.

MOUSES!

So the peeps and I have been pretty much stuck here together for twenty weeks now, due to this pandemic thingy.

And just so you know, twenty weeks is one hundred and eight million, eight hundred and sixty-four thousand seconds in cat time; and that's a whole LOTTA seconds, for sure.

MOUSES!

THANKFULLY, Peepers has taken to goin' for evenin' walks once more, and I can get her out of my fur for an hour or so every night.  That means 'bout an hour less of hearin' her cry, Sivvers, don't you want to come into the family room for a cuddle?

Did I say cry?

I meant WHINE.

MOUSES!

Now durin' these last twenty weeks, we've had ZERO peeps visitin' the house.  Oh sure, the courier comes every now and then, but he just drops the parcel he's carryin' and runs.  Never gets to step inside the door.

Not that he ever did before.

MOUSES!

But other than the courier, NO ONE has stepped paw even near the house.

In other words, we're not open for visitors.


MOUSES!

But last night...

Last night, Peepers went out for her walk, and...

SHE CAME ACROSS THE BEAR.

Okay, so technically SHE didn't come across the bear.  A neighbour did.  And he cycled up behind her and said, "Just saw a bear three streets down.  Biggest bear I've ever seen."

Or somethin' like that.

MOUSES!

Now YOU'D THINK that after hearin' that, Peepers would turn tail...

Ponytail?

Yeah, that works.

I suppose.

But like I was sayin', you'd think that after hearin' the biggest bear this neighbour has ever seen was just three streets over, Peepers would make a beeline for home.

But...

But my peep...

IS SUPER STUPID, AT BEST.

MOUSES!

Instead of comin' home and inside, Peepers continued along on her merry way, walkin' her usual walk.

Totally OBLIVIOUS of the bear.

Oblivious...  Stupid...  Whatever.

My PURRsonal theory is that with all this stayin' at home for twenty weeks business, Peepers is lonely.  That's she's missin' havin' other peeps over.  That she...

That she figured if she met up with the bear, she'd invite him on over for dinner.

Because as far as we know, bears don't carry the virus.

But that brings me back to what I said earlier:

DON'T EVEN THINK 'BOUT BRINGIN' HIM HOME!

MOUSES!

'Cause when one invites a bear over for dinner, one never really knows WHO that dinner might be.

Or should that be whom?

Whatever.

MOUSES!


***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.




4 comments:

  1. Oh noes, Seville!
    That's just crazy, walking in the same direction as a bear!

    ReplyDelete
  2. No bears allowed! I agree with you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think your peep needs a diversion. Maybe she could bring home a chippy for you, or a mouse (not moose, though they at least would have somewhere readymade to hang their coats —— do mooses have coats I wonder?) Maybe they could bring home a kitten or three? At least with the latter you'd get time off from cuddles! MOL
    Purrs
    ERin

    ReplyDelete
  4. We have had Deer but thankfully no Bear Seville. Tell that girl to Get. In. The. House.

    ReplyDelete

I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.