Wednesday, 7 February 2018

the missing heart

Has anyone seen my nip heart?

Humph, no answer.

Has anyone seen my nip heart?

STILL no answer.

HAS ANYONE SEEN MY NIP HEART?

Hey Peepers, have you seen my nip heart?  I'm lookin' for the red one.  With Valentine's Day comin' up, I wanna make sure I have my red, white, and pink nip hearts all in a row, so to speak, and ready for me to do some major nippin'.  So do you happen to know where it is?

Well if I knew where I left it, I wouldn't be LOOKIN' for it, now would I.

Of all the stupid, moused-up questions.

MOUSES!

Peepers, can you check your jacket pockets to see if it's in one of them?  I tried checkin' myself, but I can't reach your black winter jacket in the front hall closet.  It's up too high.

And uh...  Never mind 'bout those two winter coats lyin' on the closet floor, okay?  Just ignore 'em.  Pretend they're not even there.

Pretend they're not lyin' on the floor, I mean.

MOUSES!

'Cause I was tryin' to check inside your jacket pockets, that's why.

Do I have to explain EVERYTHIN' to you?

MOUSES!

It's like this, Peepers:  When I realized your jacket was up too high for me to reach, I tried climbin' up one of the longer coats hangin' next to it.  'Cause the coats are just a paw's reach from the floor.  I can grab hold of them.  So anyway, there I was, halfway up the taupe coloured one, when all of a sudden, OUT OF ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE, the stupid ol' coat decided to slip right off its hanger and fall to the floor.

Well I'm gettin' to that.

So after I brought down the first coat...  I MEAN, after the first coat slid off its hanger and fell to the floor, ALL OF ITS OWN ACCORD, I figured it must have been because it had been hangin' on some kinda messed up, faulty hanger, or some such thing.  So of course, I did what any cat would do.  I climbed up another coat.  Turns out, the front hall closet is RIDDLED with messed-up, faulty hangers.  You should probably do somethin' about that.

But anyway, 'nough 'bout this faulty hanger business.  That's not important.  It's not nearly as important as my findin' my red nip heart, so could you go check your jacket pockets please?  I'm pretty sure that's where my red nip heart is.

It must be there Peepers, BECAUSE I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE ELSE.

Yes I have.

Yes I have.

YES, I HAVE.

As a matter of fact, I did.  I did look in the coffee table drawer.

And before you ask, that coffee table drawer has a couple faulty hinges, for sure.  MOUSES!

PEEPERS, COULD YOU PLEASE GO LOOK IN YOUR JACKET POCKETS NOW?  I'm desperate over here.

I told you Peepers, I've looked everywhere.  I looked under the chesterfield, and under the chairs, and...  Well you already know 'bout the coffee table drawer.  Plus, I looked under the kitchen table, and the china cabinet in the dinin' room, and the beds upstairs, and..

That reminds me...  Wait a minute.  Be right back.

I'm back.  For a moment there, I thought my red nip heart might be in the linen closet upstairs, 'cause I was in there yesterday afternoon, knockin' towels off the shel...  I MEAN, I was in there yesterday gettin' comfy on the top shelf when some towels accidentally, ALL OF THEIR  OWN ACCORD, slid off the shelves and onto the floor.  I think the shelvin' must be sloped or somethin'.  I'm thinkin' it's faulty shelvin', for sure.  MOUSES!.

But anyway...

Anyway, it turns out my nip heart wasn't up on that top shelf after all.

Truth be told, there's nothin' at all up on that top shelf now.  MOUSES!

'CAUSE I HAD TO LOOK IN ALL THE CORNERS, AND UNDERNEATH EVERYTHIN', FOR MY RED NIP HEART, THAT'S WHY.

Does the peep not understand anythin' at all?

Just go look in your jacket pockets for my nip heart, okay Peepers?

Thank you.

MOUSES!

It's not there?  Really?  And you checked both pockets?  ARE YOU SURE?

For mousin' out loud.  I was positive it would be in one of 'em.  I've looked everywhere else.  Like quite literally, EVERYWHERE.  I even looked...

Oh hi Mason.  YOU wouldn't happen to know where my red nip heart would be, would you?

You don't say.

Hmmm...

Never mind 'bout the red nip heart, Peepers.  Mason says it's lyin' on the floor in the hallway.  Guess I left it there after playin' with it this mornin'.

MOUSES!

44 comments:

  1. The peeps just don't appreciate the nip.
    Have a wonderful Wednesday...

    Noodle and crew

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  2. Oh So glad you found your red heart. That is just good news. You all have a great day.

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    Replies
    1. It IS good news. I was super duper worried there, for a bit. purrs

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  3. MOL - it's always where you ain't lookin for it!

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    Replies
    1. TELL me about it! It's like it was hidin' in plain sight. MOUSES!

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  4. Well, I'm glad you found your heart. Your Peep should thank you for discovering all that faulty stuff in your house, some kitty could have gotten hurt. πŸ˜‰

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    Replies
    1. She should, shouldn't she. I'm thinkin' of chargin' her for my advice. purrs

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  5. Mouses!! How the nip can a red nip heart nip outta your sight Seville?

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  6. For a moment there, I thought maybe it was in San Francisco and Spitty had taken it. Isn't there a song about that?

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  7. Seville, I was really caught up in your plight, worrying about your nip valentine and those faulty hangers and shelving...sheesh, you've got a lot to cope with! Around here, toys end up in shoes, not so much pockets.

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    Replies
    1. Boy do I ever. The struggle is VERY real. MOUSES!

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  8. I've heard about hoomons leaving their hearts in San Frisco, and how sometimes hearts get broken. But this is the first I've heard of hearts being made of catnip. This is a good thing, as Martha Stewart says. Glad you found your heart, Sev.

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    Replies
    1. Nip hearts are a SUPER DUPER good thing, for sure. I wonder if Martha ever makes 'em. purrs

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  9. Now that you mention it, I have a nip heart and it is missing too. A conspiracy? MOUSES!

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    Replies
    1. Your nip heart went missin', too? MOUSES! It does sound like a conspiracy, for sure.

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  10. dood !!!!! wear haz ya been...did ya take a blog brake ?? ...we haz knot seen a post frum ya in like 9 yeerz ~~~ anyway, good ta see ya bak, happee bee lated 2018 N if de peeperz doez knot give ewe bak yur nip heart bye fryday; order 17 on amazon...all
    ya knead iz her cell number now !! ☺☺☺♥♥♥

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    Replies
    1. I'm here! I wonder if maybe the e-mail notifications for my blog got messed up. I've heard of stuff like that happenin' before. purrs

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  11. Ooops, them pesky hearts just keep popping up where you least expect! Must have been as spacial anomaly of some kind. I bet it won't be there tomorrow!
    Toodle pips and purrs
    Erin

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    Replies
    1. Spacial anomaly... SPACIAL ANOMALY... In my very own house? MOUSES!

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  12. Whew, glad you found your heart... it's always in the last place you look, right?
    xxoo

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  13. Well done for searching for your red heart your bound to be tired after all that. So happy you got it back now we can all relax. xπŸ˜»πŸ’œπŸΎπŸΎπŸΎ

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    Replies
    1. You know what? YOU'RE RIGHT! I was SUPER tired after my nip heart search. I ended up takin' a nap. purrs

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  14. Maybe my Millie is looking for something when he constantly knocks our coats on the floor :) Glad you found your nip heart :)

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    Replies
    1. Could be... Could be... That's the main cause of coats fallin' on the floor, you see. purrs

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  15. Whew, Seville. So-o glad you found your red heart, 'cause you can't be without it on Valentine's Day. I was so-o worried that maybe that lil' elf sitter that was hanging around at the last holiday may have hauled off to the North Pole for some reason. Hugs!

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    Replies
    1. There are elves who steal nip hearts? What is the world comin' to. MOUSES!

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  16. * Falls of her chair in a fit of giggles *

    Seville you are a coat wrecker!!

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    Replies
    1. I'm a coat "decorator," too. You should see the pretty patterns I made on Peep #1's black jacket with my fur. purrs

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  17. Well Detective Seville, you managed to solve "THE CASE OF THE MISSING HEART" didn't you! It was right where you left it all along!

    Hugs, Teddy

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    Replies
    1. It was. Although... I'd SWEAR it wasn't there all the time. MOUSES!

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  18. Replies
    1. Oh, it is. It's a sport, too. I'm hopin' it makes it to the Olympics some year. purrs

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  19. Hiding in plain site!? How decidedly sneaky! You sure Mason didn't have something to do with that?

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    Replies
    1. To be honest, I'm not sure if it was the nip heart or Mason that was bein' sneaky but SOMEONE was bein' sneaky, for sure. MOUSES!

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  20. Phew! I am relieved you found your nip heart in time for Valentine's Day. That doesn't mean to say you won't lose it again before then. Don't let it out of your sight!

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    Replies
    1. Those nip hearts... A kitty can NEVER let 'em out of sight. I'm thinkin' I need to tag it with a GPS. purrs

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  21. MOUSES! Those red nip hearts move all around the house, Sivvers. So they might not be where you're looking, when you're looking.

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    Replies
    1. They're like those stone angels on Dr. Who. MOUSES!

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  22. "Climmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmb ev-reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee coat...untilllllllllllllll you finnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd your hearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt" *Just doesn't have quite the same ring to it, does it?*

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.