Birds of a feather...
THEY BE FLOCKIN' TOGETHER.
And when you think about it, they're not unlike those two freaky long-haired marmie brothers of mine. You know the ones: Rushton and Andy.
Yeah, those two are always hangin' out together. If you see one, the other is never far behind.
Behind? What am I sayin'? More likely, they'll be side by side. Side by side, schemin' and plottin' and conspirin' together. Probably against me. Those two are in cahoots, you see.
Of course, their constant hangin' out together does have its advantages.
Firstly, if I know where one is, I almost always know where the other is, too. It's actually easier to avoid long-haired freaky brothers when there's only the one GROUPING, so to speak, to avoid.
And secondly, if I feel the desire to smacky-paw one, I can smacky-paw the other at the very same time. Often with the very same smacky-paw, too! Kinda like killin' two birds with one stone.
Not that I, Seville the Cat, would ever kill a bird with a stone! Personally, I don't kill birdies, period. Killin' birdies does not bode well for the local channels of Bird TV.
And speakin' of birds...
Those birdies be flockin' TOGETHER, for sure.
Now I don't know what kinda birds they are, but there must be at least a MILLION of 'em.
Okay, so maybe not a million. Probably more like a couple hundred thousand.
Okay, so maybe not a couple hundred thousand. Maybe more like 'bout ten thousand.
Okay, so maybe not ten thousand. Now that I think about it... Well... Well it's probably more like fifty or so. Yeah, that sounds about right.
But it's the BIGGEST flock of fifty birdies, for sure. Biggest fifty bird sized flock, EVER. It's HUGE! It's...
Okay, so it's like a few dozen birds.
But you should see 'em, my friends. They've been performin' on the local Bird TV network for the last couple weeks.
Peep #1 puts out some bird food and the next thing you know, they're there, perchin' on all the trees, waitin' for the peep to go away so that they can come down and eat. It's really quite the sight to see.
They're not too talkative, though. More interested in eatin', I do believe.
And speakin' of eatin'...
A kitty should NEVER confuse Bird TV with a TV dinner. They are NOT the same thing, at all.
Not that I, Seville the Cat, would ever confuse the two. Like I said earlier, I'm not into the killin' of birdies.
Not even mocking birds.
Hmmm... But if we're talking 'bout turkeys...
But that doesn't count, for the turkey I eat comes out of a tin, and tinned turkey is decidedly different, somehow.
I'm not even sure it's a bird. It sure doesn't look like one.
Plus, tinned turkey is my favourite, and there's no way, no how, I'm gonna stop eatin' my favourite din-dins. I CERTAINLY couldn't stop cold turkey and that is for sure.
But seriously, I do believe, it is safe to say that those birdies flocking to my yard are safe and sound from me.
But from those two freaky long-haired brothers of mine...
Okay, so they don't kill birds, either. 'Cause you know, it's kinda hard for a turkey-sized cat to catch a lithe little birdie. By the time they caught up with one, they'd be all outta breath!
Well... Perhaps I'm exaggeratin' a bit. I must admit, my freaky brothers are actually very agile for their size. They're pretty quick, too. They're both Olympic champions when it comes to sprinting for treats.
Nah, even if we could, we cats would never kill any of the Bird TV cast. Not even for ratings! We cats are civilised creatures. We don't live in some kinda disreputable weird and surreal, reality television world.
Besides, although we like our food fresh, those birdies are just a little TOO fresh, if you know what I mean.
And speakin' of fresh...
Oh my mouses, you shoulda heard the lip that Blue Jay gave the peep when she slept in the other mornin' and was late with his food.