Put some clothes on out there. I said, PUT SOME CLOTHES ON.
Oh yeah, it is pretty hot out today. 30C last time I checked and 30C is pretty hot to be sure.
Hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk, or so they say. Although to be perfectly honest, I have never ever - ever! - in all my nine lives, seen anyone fryin' eggs for their brekkies on the sidewalk. Of course, I'm not one to watch the cookin' channels and stuff. Mainly on account of those kinda channels never featurin' recipes usin' catnip, you see. For I know, there might very well be a whole series devoted to sidewalk cookin' and such. Cookin' eggs, meltin' butter, and makin' hot tea.
What? What's that, Peepers? What's that you're babblin' on about now?
Well that's just great, that is. Great you have some clothes on, I mean. Glad to hear you're not out there dancin' and prancin' around in the yard wearin' nothin' but a pair of earrings and a couple of rings. But guess what, Peepers. I WASN'T TALKIN' TO YOU.
That's right, my friends. I wasn't talkin' to Peep #1 when earlier, I told someone to put some clothes on themselves. Wasn't talkin' to the second peep, either. I was talkin'...
No, there aren't any stranger peeps in our yard wanderin' around nekkid.
I don't think.
Perhaps I should check.
Nope, there are no stranger peeps out there nekkid and that, my friends, is a good thing, for sure.
But back to the other nekkidness and to whom I was speakin'. It was to Saffron I was sayin' these things.
I know, I know... I know what you're thinkin'. You're thinkin' Saffy doesn't wear clothes and you are absolutely right about that. But the thing is...
The thing is...
The thing is, with all this heat and humidity we've been havin', Saffy has taken a liking to lyin' out on the driveway or deck or anywhere else, and in full public view...
In full public view...
In full public view, he is airin' out parts that shouldn't need airin'.
Okay, so maybe they do.
But you don't wanna air out your parts best left private with everyone out there a-lookin'.
That's right, that brother of mine is out there right now, lyin' on his back with his hind legs spread apart, with all of his private parts very...
That's not a word, you are sayin'?
Well perhaps it should be. My brother is out there right now, committin' acts of indecent exposure, he is. Indecent exposure, I say. Exposin' parts best left hidden by his very furry tail.
I know it's hot out there. I REALLY DO KNOW it's super-duper hot. I'm feelin' the heat, as well. But the thing is...
The thing is...
The thing is, if that darn brother of mine is feelin' so hot, MAYBE HE SHOULD GO LIE UNDER A TREE OR A BUSH OR SOMETHIN' LIKE THAT, AND NOT BE LYIN' OUT THERE ON THE HOT OPEN DECK IN FULL VIEW OF EVERYONE.
Sights like that are not fit for an innocent peep like my Peepers to see.
Remember to mask up, too.