Okay, so she's never actually done this before.
Scratch that. She's never done EXACTLY this before, but I'm pretty sure she's come close.
So this is what happened at my house, the other day:
There was the peep, trottin' out to the garage to...
Now when I say trottin', I don't mean trottin' like a horse or anythin' like that. The peep was just trottin' like... You know... A peep.
So anyway, there was the peep, trottin' out to the garage to get somethin'. It doesn't matter what she was gettin'. That, my friends, is completely irrelevant to my story. What does matter is that whatever it was she was gettin' was in the garage, it was nighttime, and it was super, super dark on account of the sky bein' clouded all over. There was not even a single star in the sky. No sign of the moon, either.
Did I mention it was dark?
So there was the peep, trottin' and walkin' across the driveway, when I heard...
Ow... Ow... Ow... *SOB* Ow... Ow... Ow...
Okay, so I didn't hear the mouses part. That was somethin' I, Seville the Cat, added from my perch at the window, inside.
One minute those Pots of Potted Peppers Plants were sittin' on the driveway mindin' their own business, and the next...
The next minute they were...
Let me put it this way: The peep walked right into those Pots of Potted Peepers - I mean, PEPPERS. She walked right into those peppers, and before she even knew it, she was FLYIN' right over 'em, too. Yup, and before she even knew what was happenin', she was comin' in for a hard landin', right on her knees.
Scratch that. She flew over those potted peppers and landed, HARD, on ONE knee. The other knee's landin' was softened by a now dead nasturtium plant growin' next to the peepers... I mean, PEPPERS.
And FYI, that now dead nasturtium plant wasn't fully dead 'til the peep crashed and landed right on it.
The peep, bein' a peep, started cryin' and whimperin' like no one has ever cried and whimpered before.
Okay, scratch that, too. I've heard people whimper and cry way worse on TV, to be sure.
Now the thing is, this is not the first time the peep has accidentally done somethin' stupid outside. I'm assumin' the other times were accidental, too, but of course, one never really knows for sure. After all, the peep is...
But although this might not be the first time she has allegedly injured herself, accidentally, this was definitely the time she managed to hurt herself the most. She couldn't even climb up and down the stairs afterwards. Least not without cryin' in agony.
That reminds me, I need a new pair of ear plugs. The peep's cries of agony are even worse than her attempts at song.
But back to the peep.
Scratch that. Back to the peep and how this stupid behaviour of hers has affected MY LIFE.
For a whole day after the incident, Peep #1 was out of commission on the anythin'-to-do-with-the-bendin'-of-the-knees front. And, as you can imagine, this was EXTREMELY INCONVENIENT for ME. I mean, I had to wait a whole extra five minutes before she could muster up the strength to get me my treats.
Can you believe it?
And I wasn't just inconvenienced by the tardiness of treats. I was inconvenienced with the serving of my meals, too. Every Single Meal, the next day, was served late. EVERY SINGLE ONE! Seriously, if I didn't know better, I would say she fell into and over those Pots of Potted Pepper Plants on Purpose, just to make me wait for my din-dins and beakkies, not to mention my treats.
And litter box duties? I was forced to watch her hobblin' over to the boxes, and...
Okay, so watchin' that was actually kinda funny. So funny, in fact, had I not been so weak from not gettin' my meals served to me on time all day, I would surly have thought of sellin' tickets to all the other neighbourhood peeps.
But back to the peep.
And her stupid ol' injured knee.
And how that stupid ol' injured knee has been affectin' ME.
You should have SEEN the peep goin' to sit down on the chesterfield. There I was, LEFT WAITIN', for goodness knows HOW long, while she managed to get herself sittin' down before I could jump up onto her knee, and...
Well we won't go into that.
Except to say, her cries of pain were EXTREMELY UNPLEASANT to MY sensitive ears.
Really. You'd THINK a peep would be more considerate than that.
But OH NO... Not MY peep.
Everythin' is always about her and HER stupid ol' knee.