home improvements with Seville

Hello there.  I'm Seville and WELCOME to my new home improvement show, Home Improvements with Seville.

Today I'm gonna show you how to panel a wall.

Now you might be wondering why I, Seville the Cat, am interested in panelling walls and truth be told, I was kinda wondering 'bout that myself, especially when I discovered just how hard wall panelling is to do.

Did you know that if you're a cat without opposable thumbs, you need to use both front paws to hold the hammer while hammering?

Did you know that when you use both front paws to hold a hammer while hammering, you have to balance on your two back paws?

Did you know that balancing on your two back paws while hammering with a hammer with your two front paws is super hard to do?  Did you?  DID YOU?  I do.  NOW.  MOUSES!

One moment I was doing the ol' balancing act on my two rear paws while hammering away with the hammer and the next moment?  Why I was down on my tail, and there was a hammer flying - no, soaring - through the air like it had grown wings or something.

And let me tell you, my friends, what goes up must always come down.  MOUSES!

Luckily for me, the peep didn't really need that ol' china mug anyway.  She still has the other ones in the set.  Those others were meant to be back-ups, I do believe.  Good thinking on the peep's part when she ordered four of 'em, way back when.

And it's not like it was one of my water or food dishes or anything actually important.  MOUSES!

But speaking of tails, I have a word of advice.  Well technically, I have more than one word but nevertheless...  Never let your tail drift between the hammer and what you are hammering.  MOUSES!

Now back to the panelling of the walls.

Why, you might ask.  Why would a cat like me wanna panel the walls of his office?  Well I'll tell you why, for sure.


Nerissa's Life, the blog, has had the good fortune to be named as a FINALIST for BEST HUMOR BLOG in the 2016 BlogPaws Nose-to-Nose Pet Blogging & Social Media Awards.  This is a great honour, for sure.  One of the greatest honours, in fact, that can be bestowed upon a cat.  Or a dog.  Or even a rat!

To be one of the four finalists this year...  WOW. Let's just say, I've been pretty nipped up since I heard on Tuesday and truth be told, there's still more nipping to do.  MOUSES!

And I'm in such good company.  Amazing company. My good pal Erin from Erin the Cat (Princess) - she's a princess, you know, Katie & Waffles from GLOGIRLY and MK & BC from Momma Kat and Bear Cat are all finalists, too!!!  All such funny blogs.  Stiff competition, for sure.  Just about the stiffest I could ever have imagined.

But I know, you're asking yourselves, Why the mouses is Seville not getting to his point and more importantly, WHAT the mouses does all this has to do with panelling walls and a home improvement show?

Very good questions, indeed.

So here's the thing.  It turns out that the four finalists were chosen, and the winner will be chosen, by a panel of judges.  A panel of judges.  A PANEL, my friends, of judges.  You see where I'm going here, right?

Clearly, the judging of this here award involves panels and panelling so you can imagine how distraught I was to discover that I have no panelling at all.  I, Seville the Cat, am panel-less!

Well I was panel-less until I started my new home improvement show and prepared for this episode on panelling.

Well actually...  Technically...  If you really wanna to get down to the nitty-gritty of things...  I still kinda am panel-less on account of this panelling thing being way harder than I thought it would be. MOUSES!

Excuse me for a mo.

PEEPERS...  I need another bag of ice for my tail!  The stuff you gave me before has all gone and melted on me.

Like literally on me.  Literally.  My fur is all wet from the melted ice and everything.  MOUSES!

Anyway, the plan is that once I get these panels up, I'll need to find me some judges and then figure out a way to incorporate 'em into the panelling.   We'll do that in episode two.

Episode three of Home Improvements with Seville will discuss the need of a good supply of ice when doing home improvements with hammers.  Especially when using those hammers while nipped.  MOUSES!

                               *****************************************

You can check out all forty-eight finalists, in this year's twelve categories, by visiting the BlogPaws announcement, on their site.  Simply click on the Nose-to-Nose Awards' name, highlighted in red, up above.

I'm in the Petties...

Did you hear?  DID YOU HEAR?  I'M IN THE PETTIES THIS YEAR!

I am so excited.  I can hardly believe my good fortune.  I'm a finalist for the Funniest Blog or Blogger in the Petties. Can you believe it?  MOUSES!

As you can imagine, I was pretty excited when I found out about this.  I was practically over the moon.  I was lyin' on the couch in the family room when Peep #1 came in to tell me.

Picture it...  Nova Scotia, Canada...  My house.  "Nissy," the peep said.  "Guess what.  You're a finalist for Funniest Blog or Blogger in the Petties."

Well I sat right up right there and then and exclaimed, "I am?  MOUSES!"

Seville was lyin' on the floor and started laughing.  He was laughing so hard, he rolled over on his back and his belly started shakin' like a bowl full of jelly.  Of course, Seville has no jelly in his belly. He's a cat.  Cats don't eat jelly.

"They think you're funny!" my brother sputtered between fits of giggles.  "That's hilarious!"

"Uh...  yeah.  That's the whole point, Sivvers."  I looked up questioningly at the peep.  "That is the whole point, isn't it?"  I looked back at my brother and narrowed my eyes.  "Just what are you talkin' about there, marmie?"

Then it hit me.  What if I'm a finalist for bein' funny?  What if it's not for bein' funny as in ha-ha but rather, funny as in... off?  MOUSES!

That very morning, when the power came back on after bein' off for three and a half days 'cause of nasty ol' Hurricane Arthur, the peep had checked on the milk in the fridge and she had said, "Ewww...  This milk smells funny."  Funny...  FUNNY.  MOUSES!

My jaw dropped and my whiskers drooped.  My tail gave a little tremble.  I, Nerissa the Cat, did NOT want to be a carton of sour milk.

That's when the peep scooped me up in her arms and gave me a little congratulatory snuggle.  "You're a finalist because your blog makes people laugh," she explained.  I glared down at Seville but he didn't notice on account of his fits of the giggles.  Apparently I had made him laugh, all right. Once more I say, MOUSES!

But what does it all mean?

Well for starters, it means that I owe each and every one of you out there who nominated me, a big ol' THANK YOU!  I am honoured.  I'm at a loss for words.  I'm speechless. Well...  maybe not quite speechless.  I do - as you know - have a tendency to ramble on just a tad.  Just a teeny-tiny tad.

Anywho...  I LOVE YOU ALL!  How's that for bein' short and sweet, huh?  Short, sweet and oh-so-very true.

But now comes the hard part, I'm afraid.  Now the VOTING begins.

If you would like to see Nerissa's Life WIN the Pettie for Funniest Blog or Blogger, you can vote for me once a day, every day, from now until August 7th.  It's a Thursday.  I checked.  Not sure it matters but I checked anyway.

To vote, all you need do is go to the Petties website by clicking here...  THE PETTIES;  or over on the badge I've put up in my sidebar.  Once there, click on "finalist voting" in the upper bar, on the right-hand side.  You'll be directed to sign in with e-mail or Facebook and then a ballot will pop up. You'll find Nerissa's Life in the Funniest Blog or Blogger category.  Just click on the little circle to the left of Nerissa's Life to vote and then click on "submit ballot" at the bottom and viola!  Your vote will be cast.

You can also vote in all the other categories, if you so desire.  If voting in more than one category, be sure to do all categories before hitting "submit ballot" 'cause you only get the one ballot each day.

Winning this award would mean so much to me.  Winnin' an award like this would mean that cats and peeps out there enjoy readin' my blog.  It would mean that twice a week, every week, my blog posts bring a little joy into the lives of my readers...  my pals...  all of you.  And it's you for whom I blog in the first place.  Without all of you, what would be the point?  I might as well just be keepin' a diary or somethin'.  You know?  Of course you know.

But do you know what else?  IT GETS BETTER.

The winners in each category get to choose the shelter or rescue of their choice to receive a donation of one thousand dollars.  ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS!  Can you believe it?

That means, IF NERISSA'S LIFE WINS, the peeps at the Petties will donate one thousand dollars to the Homeless Animal Lifeline in Manalapan, New Jersey 'cause that's the rescue group I've chosen.

The Homeless Animal Lifeline, also known as HAL, is an all-volunteer NJ 501c3 nonprofit charity. They work closely with shelters and rescues, helpin' to save as many lives as possible through foster programs and the like.  And they go that extra mile to help save the lives of kitties that are hard to place.  Special needs kitties.  Kitties that might need some extra medical attention which is expensive.

HAL is super small but they do so much good, often workin' with very little. Receiving this money would mean the world to them.  I just know it would. PLEASE HELP ME WIN THIS FOR HAL.

Remember...  you can VOTE once a day, EVERY DAY, from now until the competition closes and let me tell you, I need every vote I can get.  MOUSES!

Come sing with me!  I'm in the Petties... I'm in the Petties...  I'm in the Petties, this year.