Whatcha doin' there, Peepers? Just what is it that you're doin'?
Actually...
Actually, now that I think about it, it's probably best you don't answer. You know, pretend like you're pleadin' the fifth. And I say pretend, on account of us not havin' that fifth pleadin' thing around here.
What? What's that, Peepers? What's that you babblin' on about now?
I read. I watch TV. And some of it's even Canadian.
WHICH IS WHY I know all about all of these things. I know all about how you can and cannot avoid self-incrimination, dependin' upon your locale.
Locale. It means...
Oohhhh... So Peepers knows what the word locale means.
Fancy.
Schmancy.
Not.
MOUSES!
But now let's get back to this mess.
Yes, Peepers, mess. Mess. That's one right ol' mess you've got there.
WHICH IS WHY I didn't need you to self-incriminate yourself by answerin' my earlier question. I, Seville the Cat, am perfectly capable of lookin' at what you're doin' AND SEEIN' WITH MY VERY OWN TWO EYES that what you are doin' is makin' a mess.
MOUSES!
What? What's that, Peepers? What's that you're babblin' on about NOW?
Why the mess, of course. That big ol' mess you happened to make.
MOUSES!
You know, if I, Seville the Cat, were to track in copious amounts of soil and earth and... Well let's just call a spade a spade - no pun intended - and say what it is: DIRT. And if I, Seville the Cat, were to track copious amounts of DIRT into the house after diggin' in the garden, I'd be gettin' a right tellin' off, I would. A right tellin' off, for sure.
Who am I kiddin'? I'd be gettin' a right tellin' off just for doin' the diggin'!
So why-oh-why is it that you, Peepers, think it's okay for you to go diggin' in the garden for several hours before trackin' all this dirt into the house, when you know darn well that if I were to do the same, I'd be gettin' in trubs.
Trubs. It's short for trouble. That second syllable was slowin' me down.
MOUSES!
And THEN, as if that weren't enough, YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY to complain 'bout your muscles bein' sore?
WELL!
Well it serves you right, ol' Peepers-be-jeepers of mine. All that diggin' and delvin' and makin' a mess FOR HOURS ON END was BOUND to make you all sore. You might THINK you're a spring chicken but honestly, you're more like a grizzled old hen, and...
WHAT DID I SAY?
By gosh and by golly, some peeps get all offended by the littlest of things.
MOUSES!
And if ANYONE has a right to be offended, it's not her, but rather, it's me. Why just last week, I spent a good hour diggin' in the garden right where she planted those stupid lettuce seeds, and what did I get?
NOTHIN' BUT GRIEF.
MOUSES!
*******************************
Remember to mask up, too.
Us peeps don't do too much diggin' around here Seville!
ReplyDeleteShe should have let you do the digging. At least her muscles wouldn't hurt.
ReplyDeleteAs always, you make a great point, Sivvers. There really shouldn't be a double standard with the tracking the dirt in the house thing. Did you plant some nip where those lettuce seeds were? Because that seems like a better use of the garden, amiright?
ReplyDeleteThere is always something
ReplyDeleteWell, forgive her a wee bit, cause maybe she was planting more nip for you along with others things for herself...us pups see similar stuff here, too! but she doesn't plant anything fo rus...Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteDishing the dirt, eh Seville?
ReplyDeleteWe think the solution is for YOU to do the digging - and for HER to do the cleaning-up afterwards, don't you agree, Seville (mol)?
ReplyDeleteI'd have thought you'd have a man date to dig, Seville. And if the peeps can track dirt in, then that is just cause (that's a legal term, I think) to do likewise and also complain about it to your union rep.
ReplyDeleteToodle pips and purrs
ERin