Sunday 7 May 2023

misplaced aggression


Hey Saffy, what's up?  You're lookin' a little olive 'round the gills.


It's an expression, my man.  It's just an expression.  I'm not sayin' your charcoal grey furs have suddenly turned green.  Just means you look like you're feelin' unwell.


Well yes, the expression usually is green around the gills, but I'm tryin' to expand my vocabulary, you see.


MOUSES!


So anyway...  What's up?


Uh-huh.  Uh-huh.  Interestin'.  Hmmm...


So you definitely heard her usin' the term misplaced aggression, huh?  You're sure that was the term?


THEN WHAT ON EARTH DID YOU DO?


MOUSES!


Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.  Uh-huh.  Again, interestin'.  Very interestin', indeed.  Hmmm....


And you're sure you did nothin' at all.  You're sure you didn't lash out at her or anythin' like that?  You're sure you weren't upset with someone else and decided to take it out on the peep?  You're absolutely positively really and truly sure?


You are sure, you say.  Well not to worry, Saffy, my man.  I know the peep and I know her very well.  Peepers never holds cases of misplaced aggression against us cats.  Never!


Believe me, I know.


MOUSES!


SHE SAID WHAT?


ARE YOU SURE?


You're sure you heard Peepers say that if it happened again, she would put a stop to it, herself?


YOU'RE REALLY SURE?


And uh...  Ummm...  Well exactly how was she gonna put a stop to this case of misplaced aggression of yours?  I mean, you've already been neutered.  There's not much else she can do.


MOUSES!


SHE SAID WHAT?


Oh.


Wait a minute, ol' brother of mine.  Methinks you've got your tail in a twist, all for nothin'.  I don't think Peepers was talking 'bout you, at all.


BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE ANY SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS, Saffy, my man.  Peepers can't unfriend you or block you or anythin' like that in an attempt to put a stop to any outlandish and outrageous comments you make, on account of your not bein' on Facebook or Twitter to say stupid stuff in the first place.


I, other the paw, have to be super careful, for sure.  What with my blog and my fan page on Facebook, and all; not to mention my account over on Twitter.  Yup, I have to be super careful of what I say all the time, which is why...


Which is why I NEVER post stuff when I'm nipped.


MOUSES!


I once knew this cat who used to get nipped all the time before takin' to the keys, postin' all kinds of naughty stuff.  It was not a pretty sight, to be sure.


What did he say, you ask?  What did he SAY?


I have no idea, to tell you the truth.  What I meant was, it wasn't a pretty sight to see.  He once posted this picture of himself all nipped up like no cat has ever been nippered before.  His tongue was hangin' out and lollin' about; and there was drool drippin' down from his dewlaps.


Dewlaps.  You know, means jowls.  Like I said, I'm tryin' to expand my vocabulary, you see.



MOUSES!


But my point is, Saffron, that cat lay there lookin' just like a dog.


Not a pretty sight, at all.


MOUSES!


*******************************


And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.

6 comments:

  1. Great advice to never tweet when having nip. :)

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  2. Yep, no nip posting is a good thing you two!

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  3. We're glad to hear it couldn't have been Saffy, on account of him not having any social media accounts. Who could Peepers have been talking about, Sivvers???

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  4. Yikes, a kitty just laying there??? We don't think either of you two do any of that...right??!

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  5. Seems like The Peep is barking up the wrong tree, Saffy.

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  6. I have to say, social media is a bit of a field filled with adits and tunnels filled with anthracite substances. I'm expanding by vocab (and contracting it too). Best never to imbibe the nip beforehand. After is OK, but ne'er before.
    Toodle pips and purrs
    ERin

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.