Okay, so it's been 'bout five hundred and seventy-one million, five hundred and thirty-six thousand cat seconds since this ol' pandemic thingy began, give or take a nanosecond or two. But startin' tomorrow, almost all peep restrictions will be gone in Nova Scotia. Yup, startin' tomorrow; no masks, no social distancin', no nothin' ('cept in schools, hospitals, jails, congregate livin' situations, and stuff).
Not sure how peeps are gonna react to all this newfound freedom, they'll have. I mean, some are thrilled but others aren't happy at all, so...
So my bet is...
My bet is, THERE'RE GONNA BE CAT FIGHTS GOIN' ON ALL OVER THE PLACE!
'Cept they'll be with peeps, not cats, of course.
When a good squirt from a spray bottle doesn't work nearly as well.
But all kiddin' aside...
All kiddin' aside, I do hope peeps out there will behave themselves. Like I said, you can't spray a peep with a spray bottle or water pistol and expect them to behave.
Well you can, I guess, but it's not likely to happen. Their behavin', that is.
Thing is, those darned spray bottles aren't nearly big enough to have any kinda measurable effect!
Believe me, I've tried.
So the peeps - MY peeps - are still gonna be maskin' and stuff. They're still gonna be wearin' their masks when out in indoor public spaces, just like Nova Scotia's top doc recommends, 'cause masks help slow the spread which helps in bringin' this ol' pandemic TRULY to an end. Like, really and truly, and not just 'cause we're tired of it all.
Plus, Peepers says she has saved billions and billions AND BILLIONS of dollars on lipstick these past two years. 'Cause you know, wearin' lipstick under a mask is as silly as heck.
What's that? What's that, Peepers? What's that you're babblin' on about now?
Correction: Peepers says she saved 'bout thirty bucks.
On the lipstick, that is.
But anyway, MY peeps are still gonna be maskin' and social distancin' so if you happen to be out and about and see Peepers in her mask, don't get too close. She's social distancin', you see, and...
And she's been practicin' her Miss Piggy karate chops to keep others at bay.
HAI - YA!
She's actually kinda good.
Remember to mask up, too.