Wednesday 16 February 2022

catfishing


Hmmm...


Okay, so I've got a question for the hive mind out there.  Catfishin'...  Now is that about cats who fish, or is it about the species of fish called catfish?  Anyone know?


What?  What's that, Peepers?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?


What do you MEAN catfishin' has nothin' to do with cats nor fish?  What do you MEAN?


It means that?


MOUSES!


Boy-oh-boy, peeps really are weird.


Lurin' someone into a relationship usin' a fictional online persona.  Like I said, weird.  Cats don't ever do that!  I mean, we cats rule the Internet, for sure, but our personas aren't fake.  OUR PURRSONAS ARE REAL!  As real as personas can get.


MOUSES!


So uh, why am I asking 'bout catfishin', you ask?  You wanna know if someone has been catfishin', me?


Well...


Well I think so, yes.  Maybe.  Could be.


But they're bein' real stupid about it, for sure.


MOUSES!


I mean, I'm a cat.  A CAT!  And if you wanna lure a cat into an online relationship usin' a fake persona, try usin' a picture of a sweet ladycat on your profile and not some stupid picture of a bearded man lookin' like he just fell off the turnip truck and accidentally shot himself in the foot while at it.


MOUSES!


And then you wanna try scammin' me with fake claims I won stuff, lurin' me to your "FAKE PROFILE" and askin' me to message you?


THEN TRY TELLIN' ME I WON CATNIP, Buddy, and not that other stupid stuff you're sellin'.


MOUSES!


It seems, as of late, some stupendously stupid peeps have been attemptin' to lure me into fake friendships by leavin' suspiciously spammy, scammy, not-too-subtle messages over on my Facebook fan page, and let me tell you somethin', my friends...


I HAVEN'T FALLEN FOR A SINGLE ONE.


Like I said, pictures of bearded turnip truck casualties don't work on me.


'Cause I'm a cat.


Offers of non-catnip items won't work, either.


Although to tell you the truth, I MIGHT have gone for some actual catfish with a catnip cream sauce.


MOUSES!


And...


Well actually, that's about it, I think.


And what I do with all these catfishin' freaks, you ask?


Well...


Well it's simple, really.  I report, block, delete, then repeat.  NEXT!


MOUSES!


Like we cats don't already have enough on our paws, these days.


MOUSES!



***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.

7 comments:

  1. dood....while cat fizh iz my tee tastee...we hope ewe guyz R knot bee in catfished ~~~~~~ hizzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    ReplyDelete
  2. Someone has tried it on us too. Twice. Grammmy took care of it. Not getting fished in. Nope. Grammy's too smart for that. Sounds like you and Peep #1 are too.

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  3. The catfish sounds good to me too Seville, let's eat!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'd not heard that term before, Seville, so thanks for the information!
    Once, I tried catfish at a fancy schmancy seafood restaurant, and I hated it; tasted like mud. Blech!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I am glad you are too smart to be fooled.

    ReplyDelete
  6. There are some really stupid (and weird) peeps, Sivvers. And yeah, who the heck went and named that "catfishing?" Make no sense at all. MOUSES!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I like catfish, but catfishing humans suck!

    ReplyDelete

I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.