One hundred weeks.
One HUNDRED weeks.
One hundred WEEKS.
...AND IT FEELS LIKE A CENTURY, FOR SURE.
Not that I'm complainin', mind you.
Well, not any more than usual, I mean.
'Cause even though bein' cooped up here with a couple of good-for-nothin' peeps for five hundred and forty-four million, three hundred and twenty thousand cat seconds has been an immeasurable BURDEN upon my soul, it's all for a good cause, I think. I mean...
Well I mean, keepin' my peeps home as much as possible durin' this ol' pandemic thingy has kept 'em safe, you know? Safe from gettin' sick. Safe from them makin' someone else sick if they actually had gotten sick, themselves. Oh, and safe from landin' in jail for givin' some maskless wonder a good kick in the tail for invadin' their personal space at the grocery store.
Gotta watch out for Peepers with that last one, you know, on account of her weird ability to kick really, really high when needed.
Cat legs just don't do that, I find.
Did I mention how this has all been a burden upon MY soul?
Yup, I think I did.
But worth repeating, to be sure.
And thank goodness my peeps ARE, in fact, doin' what's right and followin' public health protocols and stuff. 'Cause if they weren't...
If they weren't...
If they weren't, and they happened to get really, really sick or end up in jail or whatever...
WHO THE MOUSES WOULD FEED ME MY BREKKIES AND DIN-DINS?
And that, my friends, would be a real calamity, for sure. Why, I'd have to go out and find myself a new couple of peeps, and then...
And then, I'd have to start training 'em all over. And let me tell you somethin', my friends. The trainin' of peeps wears upon my brain, for sure. These things called peeps are very difficult to train, you see. Difficult as all get out. At times, their trainin' appears to be impossible!
Believe me, I know. After all these years, Peepers STILL insists on fillin' the kibble bowl with mainly kibble, followed by a light sprinklin' of treats.
WHEN WE ALL KNOW IT SHOULD BE THE OTHER WAY 'ROUND.
Nope, don't wanna have to start over with the peep trainin', at all.
So there you have it. I've had these peeps on my paws now for five hundred and forty-four million, three hundred and twenty thousand cat seconds, BUT DUE THEIR KEEPIN' THEMSELVES SAFE, I'll have 'em on my paws for millions of cat seconds more, and...
Wait. One. Minute.
I'M GONNA HAVE 'EM ON MY PAWS EVEN LONGER?
Oh my mousie mousin' mouses.
Remember to mask up, too.