Sunday 8 November 2020

thirty-four weeks


BRING ON THE NIP. 


I said, BRING ON THE NIP!


Peepers, are you listenin' to me?


Well then, WHAT'S KEEPIN' YA?



BRING ON THE NIP!!!


I know, I know...  I know what you're thinkin'.  You're thinkin', why am I celebratin' havin' been cooped up in this here ol' house for thirty-four weeks with the peeps?


And in case you didn't know, thirty-four weeks is like two hundred and sixty-two MILLION, one hundred and eighty thousand, eight hundred seconds, in cat time.


MOUSES!


Well...


WELL...


Well truth be told, I'm NOT celebratin' bein' cooped up in this here ol' house for two hundred and sixty-two MILLION, one hundred and eighty thousand, eight hundred cat seconds, at all.


I mean, who would be so stupid as to be celebratin' that?


MOUSES!


What I'm celebratin' is the fact that I, Seville the Cat, HAVE NIP.


MOUSES!


That's right, my friends, my 2020 harvest has been completed and we now have A WHOLE WHACK of nip in the house.


I SAID, WE HAVE NIP IN THE HOUSE!


And it's not just any ol' nip, either.  This here catnip is primo, premium, high-grade stuff.  Organically grown, and everythin'.


NO...  No, I didn't fertilise it by sprayin'.


And thankfully, no one else did that, either.


I did what any gentlecat farmer would do.  I used sheep poopies for plant food.


But they were WELL COMPOSTED poopies, for sure!


Which makes 'em okay.


Or so I am told.


MOUSES!


But the thing is...


THE THING IS...


THE IMPORTANT THING IS, as COVID-19 numbers are surgin' in various parts of Canada as wave two of this pandemic thingy is in full force here, now, it looks like I'm gonna be cooped up in this ol' house for millions and millions of cat seconds to come.



But...


BUT...


BUT AS ANY CAT WILL TELL YOU, IT'S WAY EASIER TO BE COOPED UP WITH A COUPLE OF GOOD-FOR-NOTHIN' PEEPS WHEN YOU'VE GOT A FULL HOUSELOAD OF CATNIP ON BOARD.


MOUSES!


 ***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.

15 comments:

  1. That evil virus is surging where we live too Seville...it sure is getting old!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We were doin' so well but peeps have been slackin', I think, and the numbers are goin' up. On the other paw, with numbers bein' so high outside of the Atlantic Bubble, more cases are bound to trickle in here. But ON THE OTHER PAW, if we cats were makin' the rules, there'd be no problems. MOUSES!

      Delete
  2. How exciting that you have your nip crop, Seville! Tell your humans to stay safe.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's doin' her best. Before the peeps go anywhere at all, they ask themselves, "Is this really necessary?" Downside is I'm havin' to find stuff for them to do. Thinkin' about not usin' the litter box for a bit and let them play Find the Poopies. MOUSES!

      But yeah, havin' my own nip crop is THE BEST. purrs

      Delete
  3. Seville, not that We are after your nip supplies or anything like that (mol), but maybe We can hop on Our Magical Flying Carpets and pop over for a visit?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just make sure you use the invisibility cloaking devise on your carpet when enterin' Canada on account of the Federal Quarantine Act bein' in place. purrs

      Delete
  4. Yes Covid is one terrible scourge. We hope you get the nip you need buddy. We got a mousie last night but not a nip one. I's not telling who did it but I was up and about along with... *Names removed by request*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehehehe.. Yup, best you redact those names, for sure. MOUSES!

      Delete
  5. Our nip is drying inside now too. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yoo-hoo! YOU'VE GOT NIP TOO!

      By gosh and by golly, I'm a poet and I didn't even know it.

      MOUSES!

      Delete
  6. The Covid numbers here are astronomical, and it's scary as all get out, Seville!
    At least the Eastside Cats give me some relief from the stress.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We cats do that well, don't we. Relieve stress, I mean. I'm constantly havin' to remind my peeps to thank me for that, though. Glad to see YOU appreciate your kitties.

      Hey, PEEPERS! You could learn somethin' from this. MOUSES!

      Delete
  7. We definitely need our catnip Seville.x

    ReplyDelete
  8. Severs, I don't take to fresh nip, myself, but I'm glad Mom has stocked up on burger meat and whipped cream. Tee hee hee.

    ReplyDelete

I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.