Wednesday, 24 April 2019
we're not speaking
Hey Peepers, you hear that? I'm not speaking to you.
Well I was just wonderin' if you KNEW I wasn't speaking to you. I thought maybe you might have been thinkin' it was merely COINCIDENTAL that I've turned 'round in this chair so that my back is to you, at the same time while I'm not speaking.
You know, to you.
Well yeah, I had to say something. I had to say something so that you KNEW I wasn't speaking to you.
Boy-oh-boy Peepers, you sure are slow on the uptake.
So anyway, like I said, I'm not speaking to you.
Er-hm... You wanna know WHY I'm not speaking to you, Peepers?
Er-hm... HEY PEEPERS! Aren't you wonderin' why I'm not speaking to you?
*nothing but the sound of a cat's tail impatiently tapping*
PEEPERS! In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not speaking to you, AND THE REASON I'm not speaking to you is because you took me to the doctor yesterday for blood work and stuff, and ALLOWED them to steal my blood.
Allowed? What am I sayin'? You PAID 'em to steal my blood, Peepers. Personally, I think they should be the ones payin' me. Don't peeps get paid for sellin' their blood?
Not in Canada, huh?
Still, I'm very upset with you for lettin' that nurse steal my blood. I mean, I NEED my blood. They stole so much, I feel downright faint.
*holds paw to brow and feigns fainting, collapsing backwards in the chair*
So now I'm not speaking to you, Peepers. Hope you're happy with what you've done. Hope you're happy with the decision you made. Hope you're satisfied. Hope you're...
ARE YOU PAYIN' ATTENTION TO ME PEEPERS?
Sorry for yellin' there, ya ol' peep. I wasn't sure if you were payin' attention or not. I wasn't sure if you were aware how upset I am with your actions, and that uh... You know... That I'm no longer speaking to you. You were bein' awfully quiet, you see, and...
ARE YOU STILL PAYIN' ATTENTION TO ME PEEPERS?
Boy-oh-boy I'm tellin' ya, my peep can be downright rude. What good is my showing her my displeasure of her actions by not speaking to her, if she doesn't notice I'm not speakin'?
So anyway, Peepers, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm not speakin' to you, AND SINCE I'M NOT SPEAKING TO YOU, I can't get into a lot of the details as to why, BUT LET IT BE KNOWN that I am very displeased. Yes, definitely. VERY much so. I'm VERY DISPLEASED with your actions yesterday, and to let you know JUST HOW VERY UPSET I AM, I'm gonna lie here on this chair with my back to you, and bury my head in the corner, right under this throw pillow and...
AND NOT SPEAK TO YOU.
I can't hear you...
Nope, I can't hear you, Peepers. I can't hear you at all. I can't see you, so you can't see me not seeing you, and I can't hear you, either. Nope, I can't hear anythin' with my head half-buried under this pillow, and...
I TOLD YOU I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
AND I TOLD YOU I'M NOT SPEAKING TO YOU, EITHER.
Boy-oh-boy, that ol' peep of mine just can't get it through her thick skull that I'm not speaking to her.