I, Seville the Cat, have concerns.
That's right, my friends, CONCERNS.
So anyway, I bet you're all wonderin' about what I am concerned, AND I bet you're all thinkin' it has somethin' to do with the peep.
Well... Yeah. Why else?
So here's the thing.
Scratch that. So here are the things.
Here, at my house, we are not yet ready for Christmas. We're not even close! Our house is decoration deficient, for sure. The tree is still not up. The halls are not yet decked. There isn't even a bough of holly to be seen! AND, with Canada Post's rotatin' strike earlier this month, I don't know if Santa even got my letter!!!
Oh, and I'd like to add to that list, the lack of festive sounds and smells comin' from the kitchen. No nip cookies bakin'. No niptinis bein' stirred. I haven't even detected a whiff of a nip sprig on cheese.
Plus, the peep SERIOUSLY needs to do somethin' with her hair. I mean, if Santa gets a look at that... WHATEVER it is on her head, he'll probably climb right back up the chimney without leavin' a thing.
That is if he got my letter in the first place.
WHAT IF Santa didn't get my letter at all? What if he's thinkin' I don't want prezzies for Christmas? What if... ?
But back to that tree.
Or MISSIN' tree, that is.
Yup, you heard right. The Christmas tree is STILL not up, and it's less than two weeks 'til Christmas. Oh sure, the peep did bring out the heavy duty vacuum and give the livin' room a really good clean, but to be honest, I think she just did that to annoy me.
And yeah, she even used the new pet mess carpet cleaner on some uh...
AND WHO THE MOUSES MAKES A CARPET CLEANER SPECIFICALLY FOR PET MESSES, ANYWAY?
I DON'T CARE HOW WELL IT WORKS!
It's insultin' as all get out.
And whatever you're thinkin', those messes?
THEY WERE NOT MADE BY ME.
It was some other orange kitty, for sure.
Oh yeah, 'bout that missin' tree.
It is still not up.
It's still undecorated.
And that, my friends, is a moused-up, peep-caused travesty.
Seville, she's obviously broken Section 15, Paragraph 26, Line 133, that states in the Cat Contract: "All Christmas Trees and Decorations must be installed and approved by all cats on or before December 1 of every year."ReplyDelete
Messes, really? Messes are in the paw of the beholder!ReplyDelete
We are not prepared for the holidays either, Seville. In fact, we are really not doing them at all this year.ReplyDelete
There's still plenty of time Seville. Christmas is still a year and two weeks away. I assume you were talking about Christmas 2019. If you were referring to Christmas 2018, you may be in trouble. I hope Santa got your letter at least. I mean how else is he going to know that you want nip, nip and more nip?ReplyDelete
You are not alone, we don't have anything here. But we celebrate my birthday instead and so I will get a card and sit back with Mrs H and enjoy a log fire and cream nip liqueurs and dream of mice and a white christmas, maybe even a white christmas mouse–or two ;)ReplyDelete
That is a travesty, Severs! What is your mom waiting for? My Mom got a lil' tree set up but it's still naked -- no ornies, no garland -- naked! Can you believe that?! Our moms have some 'splain'in to do! My mom's hair looks like a birdie nest each and every day, but I never see any birdies come out of it! Winks.ReplyDelete
Ours goes up about now. Comes down 12th night (which most Americans don't appear to know about and when the tree is meant to come down).ReplyDelete
Our mom put up our tree, but stopped there. We could use some more festive decorations, that's for sure. And don't even get me started on our mom's hair! Merry Christmas to your family from ours.ReplyDelete
Mouses, indeed, Seville! How else are you going to get in some batting practice and tree falling drills purrfected!?ReplyDelete
I do hope that Saint Nick got your letter! That would be terrible if he got the fursibs and not yours!
Best of luck, Seville. Mayhaps you need a little help from an elf?!
Those are genuine concerns. Maybe you can email Santa. Not sure what you can do about the other problems though :)ReplyDelete