Sunday, 29 April 2018

whappity-whap

HEY PEEPERS!  Keep it down over there, would ya?  I'm tryin' to take a nap.

Yeah, I know I had a nap earlier.  What's your point?

Peepers, that was my mid-mornin' nap.  Before that, I had my early-mornin' nap.  Now it's time for my late-mornin' nap.  In case you hadn't noticed, it's eleven in the mornin'.  Eleven in the mornin' is prime nappin' time, if you ask me.

Well you SHOULD have asked me.  Had you asked, you wouldn't be wonderin' why I'm tryin' to take a nap right now and, MORE IMPORTANTLY, you wouldn't be interruptin' my attempt at takin' it.

For mousin' out loud woman, EVERYONE knows cats need lots of naps.  Naps are how we cats maintain our beauty.

Don't look at me like that.  Have you never heard of beauty sleep?  Lots of naps is how we cats stay lookin' as good as we do.

Speakin' of which...

Speakin' of which, YOU COULD DO WITH A FEW NAPS THERE, YOURSELF, PEEPERS. MOUSES!

Just makin' an observation, is all.

So anyway...

So anyway, you think you could keep it down?  Like I said before, I'm tryin' to take a nap.

What?  What?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?

Of course I do.  I know perfectly well that I was up at three o'clock in the mornin'.  I was up playin' with that plastic ball toy you bought us the other day.  Peepers, have you noticed how it makes lots of noise as it hits the walls when bein' whappity-whapped down the upstairs hallway?  It's a great toy, Peepers.  Thanks so much for gettin' it for us.  That was a super thoughtful thing for you to do, and...

Peepers, it's really not nice to interrupt a kitty when said kitty is payin' you a compliment.  Your constantly interruptin' me is one of the reasons I hardly ever compliment you in the first place, and...

WHAT.  What now?  What are you babblin' on about this time?

I thought I already answered that question.  YES, Peepers, I am aware I was awake at three o'clock this mornin'.  Like I said, I was whappity-whappin' that plastic ball down the upstairs hallway.

Yes, the hallway right outside your bedroom door.  That's the one.  You know of any other hallways up there?

Actually, when I think about it, I bet my whappity-whappin' of that ol' plastic ball is probably why I'm so desperately in need of my late-mornin' nap.  I bet I wore myself right out with all that whappin'.  I seriously need to start my nap RIGHT NOW, or else I'll be a sourpuss all afternoon.

You know...

You know, Peepers, if you got more naps in, you might not be so uh...  Um...  Cranky.  Know what I mean?

Why do you keep askin' me if I'm aware I was up at three o'clock in the mornin'?  I ALREADY TOLD you I was.  I already told you I was up, playin' with that new plastic ball toy you got us, whappity-whappin' it down the upstairs hallway, seein' how many times I could get it to hit the walls in one go.

FYI, in case you were wonderin' there, Peepers, the answer to that question is six.  I can get the ball to hit the walls six times in one go down the hallway.  As you might have heard, I tried to beat that record numerous times, but six is kinda the limit.  Of course, there is no limit to the number of times a kitty can try.

What's that, Peepers?  Do I think my bein' up in the middle of the night is the reason I'm tryin' to have a nap right now?

I thought we already covered that point.  I thought I already told you it was.  You're startin' to repeat yourself there, Peepers.  You goin' a little senile or somethin'?

What?  WHAT?  You're babblin' again, Peepers.

Do I think my keepin' YOU awake in the middle of the night is the reason you're babblin'?

Hmmm...

No.  You babble on 'bout all sorts of nonsense, ALL of the time.  I'm not takin' the blame for that.  What does your constant need to babble have to do with me?

Actually, I have a better question, Peepers.  Why is your constant need to babble PREVENTIN' ME FROM TAKIN' MY LATE-MORNIN' NAP?  Huh?  HUH?  WHY?

Peepers, you'll have to excuse me.  I REALLY NEED my late-mornin' nap and for the nine lives of me, I cannot figure out WHAT you are babblin' on about.  Or WHY you're babblin' on about whatever it is you're babblin' on about, either.  You just keep on repeatin' some nonsense 'bout three o'clock in the mornin'.  But the one thing I do know is, your constant babblin' is preventin' me from gettin' to my nap, so...

So seriously Peepers, I'm gonna go into the other room and I'm gonna have my nap in there.  You feel free to babble on in here, in THIS room, about whatever you want to babble on about.

Just keep it to yourself, okay?

AND DO IT QUIETLY, TOO.

My gosh, I am in SERIOUS need of a nap.

Boy-oh-boy, if I don't get this nap in right now, my whole afternoon nappin' schedule is gonna be all out of whack, and if that happens, my evening naps will end up bein' pushed back.  I might even be forced to skip a nap or two.  Can't have that.  If I miss out on a nap, I'll be too tired to whappity-whap that plastic ball down the upstairs hallway again tonight.

MOUSES!

30 comments:

  1. More naps! Why didn't I think of that? that is exactly what we peeps need! More naps!

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    1. Seriously. More naps means less cranky peeps. FACT. purrs

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  2. Now I know where Brother Simon learned the trick on bouncing the ball along the wall in the wee hours. MOUSES!

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    1. Yeah, I teach classes in the art. Night classes. MOUSES!

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  3. Your nap schedule sounds perfectly reasonable to me, Seville.

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    1. You and me both. It's a VERY REASONABLE schedule, for sure. purrs

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  4. Well, if humans will sleep at these strange times, what do they expect! Best do more practice at 3AM and get the peep used to it, then they can join your early morning playtime and the late morning nap too!
    Toodle pips and purrs
    ERin

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    1. Now THAT'S a plan. Three o'clock in the mornin' playdates EVERY night. The peep'll be used to it in no time. Thanks! purrs

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  5. Everyone should know how important our naps are. We count ours, so when our Mom comes to interrupt, we simply meow a number and she knows what number of nap we're currently enjoying. Like this: "Meeee-hree." That means we're in nap number 3 and seriously? Who interrupts nap 3? "Meee-oooleven." That means we're in nap number 11 and no one, NO ONE, should interrupt until we have number 12 firmly under our belts. How else can we play at night if we don't have at least 12 naps in??

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    1. Exactly. We NEED our naps so that we can play durin' the night and still be well-rested the next mornin'. MOUSES!

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  6. Naps are very important to us cats. And so what is wrong with playing at 3 in the morning. Great time to get some fun going. You all have a great day.

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    1. Nothin'. Nothin' at all. Playin' at three in the mornin' is PERFECTLY REASONABLE to me. MOUSES!

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  7. Yup, Seville...Humans are so grumpy they don't get enough sleep!

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    1. They sure are. They really need to take more naps. MOUSES!

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  8. Really, it's just so inconsiderate if your perp to disturb your rest. And honestly, we'd think after ignoring your thoughtful warning the other day, she'd have more respect for you now. You did try to help her, after all.

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    1. Seriously! First she doesn't listen, and THEN she disturbs my naps. One of these days... ONE OF THESE DAYS... MOUSES!

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  9. Hey Seville -- at my house us cats get even with our hoomons by doing little irritations while they sleep. My baby bro Rabbit likes to bite Mom's toes. Or chomp her arm, usually cuz he's always haungry. Zooming across pillows is huge here too. Or...barfing outside the bedroom door around 3 am. That's always good for Sleepus Inpurrruptus.

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    1. Oh yeah. Middle of the night upchucks gets peeps up EVERY TIME. MOUSES!

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  10. Seville, I have it down to a science! Now, I do whap stuffs around, but nothing too noisy. What's noise is my really stentorian announcements. They peel paint off the walls. I bring something in for her from 1100PM onward with JOYOUS loud and enthusiastic announcements. Each one and Bring plenty. I expect to be thanked...even if it is weakly. I am napping as we meow but I can dictate this straight to the computer. Siri reads my thoughts wonderfully well.

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    1. Wow. I've never peeled the paint off the walls. I bet the peep has broken a glass window or two though when she used to caterwaul. MOUSES!

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  11. Thank you, Seville, for confirming that I'm doing the right thing when I race around using Grammy as a spring board as I keep out insurgents by flinging pingpong balls at them.

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    1. Ping pong balls? Oohhh... I bet those make a LOVELY sound when whapped along an upstairs hallway. MOUSES!

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  12. Seville dude, buddy we have the same issues too! Why can't a kitty get his zoomies on at 2.39 am and take the dogleg staircase so fast mew have to go around on the walls [it's like the cage of death - so much fun!] then hurtle into the hallway, crash into a chair, send that skidding on its wheels, then leap off that into the kitchen and through to the lounge and back again and then leap onto the peeps bed from 8ft away and land with huge thwump! Like what's the purroblem???? Seriously I don't think I'll effur understand them! MOL

    Big hugs and congrats and the 6 bounces, that's impressive fur sure!

    Basil & CO xox

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    1. I need a chair with wheels. That sounds like SO MUCH FUN! MOUSES!

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  13. Sounds like you are getting seriously nap deprived! If I were you I would keep an eye on your whappity whap ball in case it suddenly and mysteriously disappears.

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  14. Oh no, you can't miss a nap! Missing a nap would be like missing a meal, the sky falling or pigs flying! EEK! I bet you'll beat your record of 6 bouncie balls whappin' the walls. Tee hee hee. Paw high fives! -Valentine (& Mom) of Noir Kitty Mews

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    1. Thanks! Gonna try to break my record tonight. Again. MOUSES!

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