HE STARTED IT.
There was an incident.
Well I'm calling it an incident. Peep #1 is calling it an all-out brawl but what does she know? She wouldn't know a brawl if she walked into the middle of one and it smacked her upside the head. I mean, it's not like she participates in brawls on a regular basis or anything like that. I don't even know if she has ever participated in one. Maybe she has NEVER participated in a brawl and if so, she's hardly qualified to determine if something is one or not. In fact, she's not qualified at all! All-out brawl... MOUSES!
Anyway, there was a brawl.
I MEAN INCIDENT!
Now the peep has me confused and everything. MOUSES!
So there was this incident involving a couple of marmalade cats, one of whom might have been me. Okay, FINE. One of 'em was me but I'm telling you right here and right now... It wasn't my fault. Plus, he started it, for sure.
So the peep took me aside and gave me a 'talking to'. You ever have a peep give you a talking to? Let me tell you, it's something I intend to avoid in the future.
She was all like, "What do you think you're doing?"
And I was all like, "He started it!"
And then she was all like, "I don't care who started it. You should have put an end to it."
And I was all like, "That's what I was trying to do when I gave him the smacky paws."
And then she was all like, "Giving your brother the smacky paws is no way to put an end to a fight,"
And I was all like, "IT IS IF YOU SMACK 'EM HARD ENOUGH!"
And then she was all like, "You're the oldest boy, Seville, and as a world-famous blogging kitty, you have a lot of responsibilities resting on your shoulders. I expect you to take the high road when things like this happen."
And I was all like, "Take the high road! You mean like walk along the top of the deck wall instead of walking across the deck itself? What does that have to do with giving my brother the smacky paws? MOUSES!"
And that was when the peep threw her arms up in the air and walked out of the room. 'Bout time, too. Needed to get back to my... um... incident.
To be perfectly honest, I'm not really sure who started the brawl... I mean, incident. One smacky paw led to another which led to another which led to another which led to some growling which led to some howling which led to Peep #1 racing into the room which finally led to that talking to. I actually have NO IDEA who threw the first paw. It's not like it was all caught on tape or something for the peep to watch later, like in a hockey game or whatever, and for that, my friends, I can be truly thankful, for if the peep were ever to start setting up hidden cameras around here, goodness knows what she might catch me doing when I thought no one was looking. MOUSES!
But back to that incident.
Truth be told, I have no idea what it was even about. It's not like Rushton said, "Yo, Sivvers! Your mama wears army boots." Not like he said anything like that, at all. And I'm almost certain I didn't say that to him.
Now it might have been 'cause I told him I was gonna spill the beans on him and I have to admit, I did do that.
Well technically, I spilled the beans on him.
Oh yeah, that's what I said!
Yeah, I was up on the island and the peep had this container of jelly beans, left over from Easter, up there. Well the lid wasn't on properly and the container was clear plastic so I could see through it and it was very obvious that those beans looked like they might be rollable beans on account of their having some roundness to them in parts. So I got the thing open and spilled the beans onto the island. A number of 'em rolled off the island and as Rushton just happened to be hanging around on the floor down there, those beans spilled right on top of him, so yeah, technically I did spill the beans on him, after all. He wasn't too thrilled with that but it's not like I did it on purpose or anything. MOUSES!
Okay, you've got me there. I did spill the beans on purpose. It was the part about spilling 'em on Rushton that was by accident. MOUSES!
On the other paw, maybe he just looked at me the wrong way. Or maybe I looked at him the wrong way. Like I said earlier, I'm really not sure who threw that first paw.
Peep #1 wanted to know if I had a learned a lesson and I said, "Lesson! Who said anything about school?"
But truth be told - and let's just keep this between us 'cause I wouldn't want the peep thinking she had taught me anything - I did learn a lesson from this little incident. I learned that if you're gonna have an incident with a marmalade brother, make sure you do so without any peeps finding out. Incidents are one thing but those talkings to? Those talkings to are pretty much the most awful things to happen to blogging marmalade kitties, ever. MOUSES!