Dogs. DOGS! Today's blog post is being brought to you by dogs. Yup, it has pretty much gone to the dogs, to be sure. MOUSES!
I was sitting here at my desk this morning, minding my own business, when I happened to look out the window and what did I see? You guessed it, dogs. Dogs minding - or rather doing - their business, I might add.
Again I must say, MOUSES!
Funny thing 'bout dogs; they sure do have their peeps well trained. I mean, you see 'em walking their peeps here, there and just about everywhere and that, my friends, is what I wanna blog about today.
Well that and run-on sentences.
Fooled you! There will be no talk of run-on sentences in this post. I might use one or two or maybe even three but I'm not gonna talk about them except, of course, for my brief mentioning of them and that, my friends, is for sure. MOUSES!
But let's get back to those dogs.
Ever notice how dogs have to be walked? Huh? Ever notice that?
Now personally, I enjoy a nice walkabout, myself, but not when the weather is nasty and stuff. I like walking about the garden when it's sunny and the temperatures are just right. Not too cold and not too hot. Know what I mean? And although I have been known to go for a walk in the yard when it's snowing, I don't want to go outside when there's a blizzard a-blowing and I certainly don't want to go out in the rain. Rain is just... well... icky. MOUSES!
But dogs have to go outside for walks, no matter what the weather. Whether it's cold or suffocatingly hot or snowing or pouring or blowing up a storm, when you're a dog, you need to go outside for your walks. That kind of sucks if you ask me. MOUSES!
And it's not just the dogs, either. The peeps have to go out walking 'em, too.
I've heard some peeps say they like walking their dogs 'cause it keeps them healthy and stuff. I can see that. Kind of.
Yup, I can kind of see how having to walk a dog might give a peep a reason to go out walking but when you think about it, peeps can go out walking pretty much any time they like so technically speaking, they don't have to have a dog in order to take a walk. I mean, if it's exercise they're after, peeps can simply go do their exercising without any dog being required.
You don't need a dog in order to exercise.
Never once have I heard a peep say, Boy-oh-boy, I'm the luckiest peep around 'cause my car broke down last week and now I have to walk to work and the grocery store and to my doctor's appointments and when going on dates so really, because I've been forced to leave the car sitting in the driveway while I walk just about everywhere, I'm the healthiest person around.
Of course, there was that guy from Canada Post who claimed senior citizen peeps WANTED to walk on slippery sidewalks in the dead of winter to struggle through drifts of snow to pick up their mail at one of those gigantic super-sized mail boxes because those senior peeps wanted to get out and get more exercise. Yeah, there was that guy. Of course, I'm not sure he was walking along those same streets. Nah, he probably drove his car.
Need I say it? Sure, why not? MOUSES!
But once again, let's get back to those dogs.
This is not an anti-dog post. No sirree, I'm not an anti-dog kind of cat. This here post is actually pro-dog. Or rather, for the dogs, so to speak... type... whatever.
This here post is about a newly invented invention of mine. Well technically speaking, I haven't actually invented it yet. I'm still in the planning stages and whatnot but once I have a working prototype, I'm planning on presenting it on that television show where cats and peeps present their business ideas to these financial bigwigs and get money to make 'em happen and stuff.
Well actually... if I'm gonna be really technical... so far...
So far there haven't been any cats appearing on the Dragon's Den. Nope, so far only peeps but I figure there's a first time for everything so why shouldn't I be the first cat to appear on that show, ready to start up a business and stuff? Huh? Why not? MOUSES!
And when you're a cat like me with such a great idea as mine...
Well I think the Dragon's Den is the PURRfect fit and will be lucky to have me, to be sure. MOUSES!
So here's what I'm thinking...
You take a big plastic box, kind of like a litter box but bigger in size. Four by four feet should do nicely but unlike a kitty litter box, it will have lower sides. Yeah, only an inch or so of rim is necessary as no litter is required because as we all know, doggies don't like to bury their... uh... you-know-whats as do we cats. And in the middle of the box, will be a fire hydrant for the peeing station and below that, some sort of catch-all for the uh... liquids. And next to the box will sit a box of poop bags and disinfectant wipes, for easy clean-up.
But that's not the whole thing! Oh no, the litter box part of the the litter box sits next to a circular wheel - pardon the redundancy - that is wide enough for a dog and a peep to walk, side-by-side. Just like they make 'em for gerbils and whatnot only bigger on account of the dogs and the peeps who will be using them, instead.
The beauty of my indoor doggy toilets - which is my working name for now - is that dogs and peeps can still get their exercise and do their daily constitutionals but they can do so, from the comfort of inside their own home. No rain or snow to contend with. No icy cold winds. No cars madly beeping their horns. No mailmen yelling when you chase 'em. None of that nasty stuff at all!
What's more, my indoor doggy toilets will answer the age-old question of who let the dogs out? The answer, of course, will be no one for no one need let the dogs out if said dogs are doing their business indoors. MOUSES!
When you think about it, it's pure genius, really. Yup, pure genius for sure. Just goes to show you, it takes a cat to invent an indoor doggy toilet with walking wheel accessory, to be sure. MOUSES!
And speaking of litter boxes, the peeps are still waiting on that permit from the Department of Environment for The Big Dig to begin in my backyard but we heard today that the permit has been processed and issued so that's some good news, for sure.