I've been snooping. I admit it. It had to be done. MOUSES!
Actually, the peep is the one that says I've been snooping. Originally, I was investigating. Apparently, according to the peep, investigating and snooping are the very same thing. I disagree but as Peep #1 was dishing up breakkies at the time we were having the snooping versus investigating debate, I decided at the last minute to allow her to win.
Actually, I allowed her to win round one. After I ate my breakkies, I informed Peep #1 what I was doing was far more like investigating than snooping after all. MOUSES!
Snooping and investigating really aren't the same thing, you see. If they were, why would we need two different words? Doesn't make any sense to me at all that there would be two words if snooping and investigating were one and the same. Don't you agree?
But they're NOT synonyms at all. Well, at least not in my book. Maybe in someone else's book but in mine, they're not. They're not cinnamon, either. Or cloves or nutmeg or...
Gosh this blog post is getting a little spicy, even for me. MOUSES!
But back on topic. In my mind, snooping is done when someone is minding someone else's business out of curiosity or mischief making or whatever. Investigating is when the cat making the enquiries is doing so out of necessity and as we cats are by nature curious, snooping is always necessary.
MOUSES! I think I just admitted that snooping and investigating are one and the same. Gosh darn it.
Well investigating sounds way better than snooping so I think I'll stick with that no matter what the peep says.
You know, Nissy was a bit of an investigative reporter. He was NOT a snoopigative reporter. There isn't even such a thing as a snoopigatvie reporter. Is there?
But also, Nissy was a cat. Snoopy is a dog. Totally different species.
And isn't there some Snoop Dogg person out there? See? Snoop DOGG. Clearly snooping is not for cats. Must be a peep and doggy thing, I think. Makes sense to me!
Anyway, I was snooping...
I MEAN INVESTIGATING!
While INVESTIGATING Nissy's office the other day, I came across his stash. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I came across a big old stash of the nip or something and to be perfectly honest, I was thinking that I would come across something like that, too, while snooping... INVESTIGATING Nissy's office. Unfortunately, no such luck.
What I did find though was a whole whack of books. You should see them all! I always knew that the peep and Nissy had shelves and shelves of cozy mysteries and I had a couple up there, myself, from taking that Kitty Lit. 101 course with Niss.
Oh, by the way, I'm going to be attending summer school classes on the Kitty Lit. 101 front so I'm currently in search of some good summer reading material but I'll write more about that in another post.
Anyway, Nissy had a stash of books that I didn't even know about. Not cozy mysteries but...
No, he did not have a stash of questionable reading material and calenders and stuff. Nissy was a gentleman, for sure.
What Niss had was a stash of books that helped him write. It's true. For starters, he had multiple dictionaries. One of them was three volumes big. Can you believe it? It took the dictionary peeps three whole volumes to write all the definitions of all the words out there and even with all that space, they still didn't manage to include the word MOUSES! Some peeps and their dictionaries... MOUSES!
But Nissy's stash contained more than just dictionaries. He had several books on grammar, too. No wonder he always knew whether to use lay or lie or me or I although to be perfectly honest, he did sometimes mess up on the was and the were. Not the simple cases but with those tricky ones. You know... When you're talking about one thing that contains more than one item. Always a trickster for sure. Were? Was? MOUSES!
And by the way, I looked through his entire stash and every single book on grammar had all comments about run-on sentences inked out. Not nicely inked out, either. No ruler-straight line crossing out the paragraphs. To be honest, I think someone just took a bottle of ink and tossed it all over the pages. Someone was a little touchy on the run-on sentence subject, if you ask me.
I think it was the peep. MOUSES!
And speaking of Old Peepers, I found a few notes of Nissy's, some of which pertained to her. He had written down some laws. I'm not sure if they were his own personal laws or laws he was going to try to get passed once he was appointed to the Senate. Or maybe both. I'll blog more about these laws in the future but I think there's time to tell you about a couple right now.
Nissy's Law #2: When in doubt, ask the peep. It's an interesting law because, as you know, Nissy's Law #1 was, "when in doubt, BLAME the peep." Seems to me that these two laws are slightly contradictory but I suspect that contradiction in law is nothing new. But he had this specific law written down on a scrap of paper in one of his grammar books. I think perhaps it applied only to grammar. I think that maybe the peep was his back-up grammar book but - and I'm going out on a limb and just thinking aloud here - I'm not sure what good the peep would be with any of his questions. As Nissy always said, his grammar was far better than that of the peep's and it's no wonder. Look at all the books he had on the subject!
Of course, I have no evidence that he ever read any of those books... MOUSES!
Oh no, I do. He blacked out all that stuff about run-on sentences but then, like I was thinking before, I'm not sure that Nissy was the one who did that as I find it far more likely to have been the peep who did it which means I have no evidence at all as Nissy had a true love of writing and books and I just can't see him making a mess of the books with ink like that. Gosh, he didn't even like my turning down the corners of the pages. Always insisted that a bookmark be used. Always said he didn't want any of his books to have dogs' ears. Or maybe he said dog eared... Boy, this subjuect is making me dog tired, for sure. MOUSES!
But you know, asking the peep for help with tricky grammar is pretty smart. If she gets it wrong, it's all her fault. And that brings us right back to Nissy's Law #1: When in doubt, BLAME the peep. My brother was a GENIUS, for sure.
Yup, Genius should have been his middle name. MOUSES!