MOUSES! It happened again.
So the other night, Peep #1 was out and about, walkin' the streets of the neighbourhood at some ungodly hour, wearin' nothin' but her nightie... AGAIN.
This time, I knew she wasn't a ghost. This time, I knew it wasn't Hallowe'en in July. This time, I knew it was just the peep.
I knew the peep was just the peep and not a ghost or somethin' on account of her nightie havin' some flowers on it. Ghosts don't wear flowers. And I knew it wasn't Hallowe'en in July because it was already August. The very beginning of August, yes, but August, nonetheless. Can't have Hallowe'en in July in August. That wouldn't make sense.
But there was my peep, walkin' around in her nightie at quarter-to-two in the mornin', carryin' nothin' but a flashlight in her paw. She wasn't flashin' the neighbourhood or anythin' though. Like I said, she was wearin' a nightie. MOUSES!
Of course, you all remember that the last time this happened was when Peep #1 was out lookin' for my brother, Seville, and then my sister, Tess, magically escaped through the almost-closed livin' room window. Well this time, Tess was not involved. Seville was but Seville is not the one who ended up in the doghouse. It wasn't Seville's fault, at all.
This time, Seville was not the perpetrator but rather, he was the perpetratee. He was the victim. The victim of a great injustice. A crime, for sure. The crime of unlawful confinement.
Picture it. Quarter-to-two in the mornin', way past all our bedtimes - we're all supposed to be in the house, long before that - when Peep #1 realises that Seville isn't inside, sound asleep somewhere and dreamin' of nip mice and whisks. She goes lookin' for him. She calls his name from both the front and back doors but to no avail. Hmmm...
So that's when Peep #1 grabbed a flashlight and headed on outside. She walked up and down the driveway, usin' her soft, don't wake up the neighbours voice and callin', "Seville... Seville... Sivvers..." but it did no good. There was no sign of that marmie brother of mine. Not any sign, at all. So then the peep started walkin' up and down the street, still callin' his name.
I was watchin' Ol' Peepers' middle-of-the-night escapades from a window but couldn't hear her 'cause like I said, she was usin' her don't wake up the neighbours voice. I could see her though. Yup, I could see her prancin' around the neighourhood in her nightie, carryin' nothin' but a flashlight and I was hopin' and prayin' that she did not call too loudly and end up wakin' those neighbours after all 'cause I could just imagine who they might call. Perhaps it would be the men in blue but more likely, they'd be callin' the men in white who would cart her off to a place where she would be sportin' a nice little jacket that was particularly straight. And should that happen, my breakfast would most likely be late. MOUSES!
Anywho... Ol' Peepers was out there callin' and callin' for Seville. Eventually, she returned to our own yard but there was still no marmie brother in sight. Again I say... MOUSES!
Peep #1 continued to parade up and down the driveway for a bit. I was later informed that the reason for this secondary paradin' was that the peep thought she could hear Sivvers cryin'. It was not, as I first suspected, a desire to start up a one-peep parade.
The peep thought she could Seville cryin' very faintly. His voice was so plaintive. She couldn't tell where it was comin' from. Was he hurt somewhere? In the garden? In the ditch? Was he okay?
Finally, the peep wondered if... Could it be? No... IMPOSSIBLE. No one had been in the garage all day long, but... Hmmm...
So Peep #1 went over to the garage and opened that ol' garage door. And what before her wondering eyes did appear? Why, that marmie brother of mine, of course. It was my brother, Seville and believe-you-me, he was awfully happy to have been found. Out of the garage he leapt and started purrin' and speakin' to my peep, tellin' her all about the terrible thing that had happened.
While it was true that Peep #1 had not been in the garage that day, the same could not be said for Peep #2. Around four in the afternoon, said second peep had gone into the garage to get a broom. The garage door had been left open for only a short little while but with us cats, a short little while is really all it takes. Mischief comes lookin' for us, you see. We don't look for it. It just appears and asks us to cooperate.
Anywho... Around four in the afternoon, the garage door had been open and when Peep #2 was closin' it afterwards, said secondary peep did not - as any good peep should do - double check to make sure no one was in there, left behind. So the door was closed and that, my friends, was that.
Unfortunately for Seville, the garage door closin' was like the slammin' shut of the bars of a jail cell and thus began his period of unlawful confinement. His almost ten-hour-long ordeal. The horror! The horror of all horrors! He had done nothin' wrong. He had simply co-operated with our long-lost pal, mischief. Okay, maybe not so long-lost but definitely a pal.
Seville is still quite upset about the whole affair. Physically, he's fine. Emotionally however, he's a wreak. Can you blame him?
I'm thinkin' of takin' a couple on-line legal courses so that I can act as his lawyer. You know, in case Seville wants to take legal action against Peep #2. I'm thinkin' he could sue for nip and I, as his lawyer, would receive a percentage of the nip which sounds pretty good to me. In fact, it sounds so good that I might encourage a couple of my sisters to accidentally get themselves locked in the garage by Peep #2, as well, but we'll wait and see how Seville's case goes, first.
Meanwhile, Peep #2 is currently residin' in the metaphorical doghouse of all doghouses. Can't reside in a real doghouse on account of us not livin' with any dogs and therefore, not havin' a real doghouse in which to reside. But the point is bein' made and bein' made well, I can assure you. Yup, the second peep is in the doghouse, for sure.
By the way... Anyone out there know the standard percentage of nip a civil lawyer who happens to be a cat with just a couple on-line legal courses under his collar can charge from a nip settlement? Anyone? Anyone at all? Surely someone must know. MOUSES!