Sunday 24 November 2013

little glass houses

People who live in little glass houses really shouldn't be throwin' stones...  or somethin' like that.

Hmmm...  little glass houses.  I don't know anyone who lives in a little glass house.  Not a real glass house, anyway.  Most houses 'round here are constructed from wood and stone and bricks and whatnot.  The only parts made from glass are the windows.  Oh, and there are probably some glasses in the cupboards and maybe on the peeps' noses but that's not the same as bein' a house made from glass, I should think.

Of course, plants sometimes live in glass houses.  My peep sure would like a proper glass house for her plants.  But even those are sometimes made from things other than glass these days.  And who would ever dare throw a stone at a house filled with plants?  Why, that would just be rude.  It would be mean, too.  Especially if those plants got all frosted and killed 'cause of those stones and all that broken glass.

Anywho...  I'm really bloggin' about a different kind of glass house today.  I'm bloggin' about a metaphorical glass house which, ironically, contains no actual glass.  MOUSES!

I'm bloggin' about the metaphorical glass house in which my stalker, Mr. Anonymous Spam, lives.  Yeah...  ol' spammy spam-spam is back.

Mr. Anonymous Spam has been leavin' a bunch of comments on my blog again.  The other day, there were three or four of the things.  A couple more, the day before that, too.  But a month or more ago, he left a real doozy of a comment.  It was such a doozy, I wrote it down and saved it 'cause I just knew I would wanna blog about it sometime.  Well, my friends, that sometime has arrived.

A month or so ago, I awoke to find this...  this...  this comment awaitin' moderation on my blog.  Ol' Mr. Spammy wrote, "of course like your web site but you have to check the spelling on quite a few of your posts.  A number of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very troublesome to inform the reality on the other hand I'll certainly come back again.  Visit my web-site:  couponing"

Yup, that's just what that ol' spammer guy wrote.  I didn't change a thing except for removing his website address.  Didn't think I needed that.  Didn't want it, either.

Well Mr. Spam, I have news for you!  First of all, let's talk about the issue of the spellin'.  Hmmm...  you're not perfect, you know.  You're not perfect at all.  For instance, I believe you spelled the word "to" incorrectly.  I think you actually meant, too, although to be honest, I'm not positive 'cause quite frankly, your comment didn't make a whole lot of sense.  Your problems appear to go way beyond that of issues with spelling.

You find it troublesome to inform me the reality of what?  The reality of all my spellin' mistakes?  I wasn't quite sure 'cause you didn't really specify what that what was.  I had to guess.  And I assume it is you who likes my blog although you never really said.  Again, I was left guessin'. 

And a comma or two might come in handy there, you ol' spammy spammer.  A few commas might make it easier for cats and peeps to understand what you're actually tryin' to say.  I have to admit, my punctuation is never perfect but that's 'cause I like to use a colloquial style of writing.  My very own colloquial style.  That's why I sometimes use punctuation that might be frowned upon by a grammar professor at Oxford or Cambridge or someplace like that but that's just my style.  And, I like to start sentences with "and" and "but" a lot, too.  But I try to do it sparingly.  And only when it fits in with my style.  Actually, that last and and but were somewhat gratuitous.  They really weren't warranted.  I could have rolled that all into one sentence but I was tryin' to give you an example, Mr. Spam.  Yes, indeedy, I was.

All I can say is this...  at least MY blog makes sense...  sort of...   well, most of the time.  MOUSES!

But back to the spellin'.  I've said it before and I'll say it again...  a lot of the words I use on my blog are not yet found in spell checks and dictionaries and whatnot.  That's not my fault.  It's not my fault that the dictionary writers have not kept up with the my latest inventions.  That's right...  I invent words.  I invent 'em all the time.  That's what we innovative writer types do.  When there isn't an appropriate word available, we invent one to suit the occasion.  Not my fault the dictionary peeps can't keep up.  Not my fault at all.

And let me just remind you that the inventor of the word always determines the spellin' of said word.  It's a fact.  I should know.  I should know 'cause I am an inventor of words.

Perhaps Mr. Spam, it is the dictionary peeps to whom you should be sendin' your comments.  Perhaps you could offer them a coupon or two for some of my newly made-up words.  Or perhaps you could take advantage of some of those coupons yourself.  Do you happen to have any coupons for books on the subject of grammar?   Just wonderin'.  Just thinkin' you could use one.  Just suggestin' it might be an good idea.  'Nough said.

MOUSES!


50 comments:

  1. We have moved our Mr. Spam to the bottom of our biggest litter box and he doesn't say much lately!

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  2. You can turn that off in Blogger's settings;-)

    Mine's off.

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    1. Oh no! I like havin' the moderation on. That's how I prevent that ol' spammy spam-spam from gettin' his comments published. Moderation is the best! purrs

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    2. Oh no, I meant you can turn off Anonymous from commenting. I have that;-)

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    3. Oh yeah... I had totally forgotten about that settin'. I didn't use it 'cause every now and then, some of my pals from twitter and whatnot comment as anonymous but they're different. One can always tell when the comment is legit and when it's just spammy spam-spam spammer. purrs

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    4. You tell him sweetie love ya blog going to friend ya on fb so I can read it daily. Thanks to nephew Pingus page I found you and great reading. Hugs

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  3. The nerve if anyone human or inhuman critiquing a kitty's spelling! You spell right good! MOL

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  4. We already loved your previous post about Mr. Spam, which was very... hem... understandable. Spammer seems to be slow to understand ! We totally agree with Brian about the bottom of a big and deep litter box. Purrs

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  5. Hmmm, sounds like Mr. Spammer needs a little litter kicked over him! MOL!

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  6. I think Mr. Spam needs to focus on his own spelling errors!

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  7. I've re-read the Spam's spelling post and cant' stop laughing! What a joker!! Mouses indeed! Take care
    x

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  8. Mom says Mr Spam's comment reminds here of some of the instructions she's gotten lately. She laughed really loud when she tried to read the one to her monitor!!

    The Florida Furkids

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  9. Furry well miaowed , Nissy !
    Me too have the settings on moderation , so me too get spammed now and then.
    Some can actually be amusing to read :)
    XOXO

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  10. I find it most entertaining when spammers tell me my posts are well-written and informative... and they are commenting on a Wordless Wednesday post!

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  11. Huh. Some peeps are just RUDE! But as always, you told 'em off really well, NIssy.

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  12. You tell them Nissy,Thats partly why we have moderation on too,but I had a very rude comment once not fit for my pals eyes,xx Speedy

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  13. You are so right Nissy.. We used to have another blog and we were getting 200 spam messages a day so we switched to blogger and hardly get any now. The spam people are a true pain in the you know what. Take care and have a great day.

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  14. You tell him Nissy. I could never understand the idea of what they get out of spamming. Most of us check our blogs daily and removed stuff like that. So what's the point.

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  15. The spammers are just crazy, aren't they, Nissy? They can make for some good entertainment, though. Thanks for sharing the funny one with us.

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  16. Mouses! This was funny. I'm sorry Mr. Spammy is bugging you but he did provide good material for a post, MOL. I have to laugh when they obviously think they are being so clever, offering helpful advice and such and then, oh yeah here is my link. Like we are so dumb we don't know what they are up to.

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  17. I have heard of that creep! YOU tell him Nissy!

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  18. Some spam is so silly. We rarely get any so we are lucky. Lee and Phod

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  19. Spammy spam visit my email a lot. Maybe he will come back and comment about this post. LOL.
    Sue B

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  20. Horrible small people making nasty comments and hiding behind Anonny Mouse. Hit the delete button on them.

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  21. I guess I am not popular enough for the spammity-spam-spammers to visit cause I think I have only had one or two in the past three+ YEARS! Apparently, Mr. Spammer is SELECTIVE. You should be flattered.

    In other news, I never really noticed that adorable little beige-ish/brown-ish spot you have on your little chinny-chin-chin. We lubs it. We aren't spellin' so good neither. Do you think Mr. S might visit me now?

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    Replies
    1. Maybe the spammer is scared to spam you as you're a king and all. He might have thought spammin' a king would get him in trouble or somethin'. purrs

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    2. About the beauty mark on my chin... *blushes*

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  22. Mr Spam has been hitting me big time too, but thankfully most are not making it onto the blog, just via email, it is annoying as heck!

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  23. We think Mr. Spammer has waaaaay too much time on his hands for leaving comments on all our blogs!

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  24. Those darn spammers huh?!!
    Loved reading your post.
    Http://ownedbyahusky.blogspot.ca

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  25. well Nissy, at least your Mr Spammy is in a language you can read and quote. Thanks Cod my WP blog catches all the Mr/Ms Spams...'cuz mostly...I can't even translate them...they are in languages I cannot even use translator ...just sayin'

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  26. heh. And you got a great blog post out of Sir Spamalot! But we're not sure he's a guy. Which is confusing. Nevermind.

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  27. I'm almost scared to say it...but I don't get very much spam at all.
    We just ignore and delete anything if it comes in.
    Do you have your comments setting set to allow anonymous comments? We don't anymore and that has cleared up 99% of the spam.
    Some still gets through though.
    ; ) Katie

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    1. Yeah... I think that's my problem. I've left that setting on 'cause a couple of my pals don't have blogs or twitter accounts and if they wanna comment, they do it anonymously. They're definitely real pals and not spammers. But on the other paw, if Mr. Anonymous continues to spam me, I shall continue to mock him. What more can a cat do? purrs

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  28. Yikes we hate Mr.Spammer so we got rid on blogger and never been happier. The cheek of them. Have a marvellous Monday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  29. Wow I love it, you so nailed him!!

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  30. So that pesky Spammer is at it again huh Nissy? Well, we have visits from Spam-a-holics too but we just delete and move on. They are a pain I agree. Isn't it sad that so many humans have nothing better to do than Spam the heck out of our bloggies and emails??? I may have to do a special Sammy Whammy on them!

    Kitty Hugs, Sammy

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  31. Nissy we got so tired of spamming OLD comments that we finally turned off the Anonymouse comments. Yeah it does stop people without a google account from commenting but we were having to close comments on old post from eons ago and that was frustrating. I mean why would they target a post 6 years old and visit it 800 times? ARGH

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  32. Yup, we get fed up of spammers too, Kizzie says she would bat them if she could.

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  33. I used to see quite a bit of Prof Spammer until I cut him off at his anony-mouses bits!!! He is dead to me!!

    Great post Nissy! :)

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  34. Nerissa, you told Mr. Spammer off, right some good!

    Mindy
    Moe
    Cookie
    Mike

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  35. That Spammer needed a lesson. You told him, Nerissa!

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  36. We certainly love your technique of mocking the spammer. Especially if you can't turn on anonymous filtering!

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.