Wednesday 25 September 2013

as old as the hills

We've got a birthday comin' up at my house this week.  Day after tomorrow, Ol' Peepers turns...  She turns...  Hmmm...  just how old does she turn?  You know, I don't know.

Bein' an investigative reporter and a member of the Feline Bureau of Investigation, I set out to determine just how old the peep would be turning.  It wasn't easy.

Apparently, her age is top secret, known only to a select few on the planet.  Birth certificates have been tucked away in locked drawers to which there are no keys and witnesses to the event have been silenced.  I knew the truth was out there, somewhere, but where?  WHERE?

Then I realised that I already knew...  kind of.  I've always known that my peep #1 was as old as the hills.  I've said it more times than I remember.  I've said it more times than the peep cares to remember.  I concluded that all I needed to determine was the age of the hills.  Then I would know the age of the peep, as well.  So I cried aloud, "Internet, don't fail me now!"

Firstly, I needed to identify the hills.  We live in a valley so there are hills to the north of us as well as to the south.  I discovered that the North Mountain was formed in the Triassic Period and could be anywhere between 200 and 250 million years old.  Hmmm...  could my peep be that old?  What about the South Mountain?  Turns out that that one is even older.  It was formed during the Devonian Age and is between 360 and 420 million years old.  Could my peep be that old?

Are there any younger hills here in Nova Scotia?  Younger hills to which my peep's age could be compared?  How 'bout those mountains in Cape Breton about which I've heard.

An investigator's work is never done and I immediately set out to find the age of the Cape Breton Highlands.  Ol' Peepers was gettin' older by the minute.  I found references to those mountains bein' as young as 750 million years old.  The word billion was mentioned, too.  MOUSES!

To be honest, I'm not quite sure how accurate my sources are.  Peep #1 doesn't look a day over 500 million.

I was back to square one.  She's as old as the hills and the hills are pretty old.  That's all I know.  Again I say, MOUSES!

Anywho...  I figured that if Ol' Peepers was THAT old I had better get her a prezzie or two.

As luck would have it, I already had one on paw.  Not that long ago, I was the lucky winner of a t-shirt from RC Tees.  I won it in a giveaway over on my pal Layla's blog, Cat Wisdom 101.  Since I myself don't wear clothes - 'cause I'm a cat - I figured I could give the peep the shirt.  What a plan!  WHAT A PLAN!

All I needed to do was wrap it.  So I snuck into the little craft / sewing room that's not much bigger than a closet and dug out a gift box, tissue paper and some ribbon.  This was a mistake on my part.

Let's just say that the spool of ribbon was confiscated by the peep before I could use it, the tissue paper has been shredded and the box has seen better days.  I had the best of intentions but...  but...  BUT I JUST COULDN'T HELP MYSELF!  I mean...  there was tissue paper and ribbon and a box...  What do you expect from a cat?

I did however, manage to keep the peep from seein' the t-shirt.  Thank goodness for that.  She will get her prezzie and it will be a surprise even if it isn't wrapped. 

And as a bonus prezzie, I'm gonna toss in some seeds, as well.  I sent my brother Rushton out to gather them.  Those weeds the peep was tryin' to grow in the ditch are settin' seed and my brother was able to brush his big floof of a tail all over the seedy weeds and collect 'em .  We gathered the goldenrod seed, brought them into the house and smooshed them together into a little pile which we then pushed under some stuff where the peep will never look. 

Of course, I did consider putting 'em in a gift bag but Rushton was quick to point out that a bag wasn't gonna fair much better than boxes and tissue paper so, in the end, we decided to settle on just putting 'em in a pile.  Sure do hope Ol' Peepers doesn't decide to do somethin' stupid like vacuum or dust or whatever. 

And there might be another prezzie or two comin' her way.  We still have two days.  A lot can happen in two days, you know.  One never knows what eleven cats might come up with in two days. 

We've also all decided to take a pledge to try really, really hard on the peep's birthday to be nice to her and well-behaved.  We're not makin' any promises.  There are no guarantees.  The pledge is to try and that's about as good as it gets. 

But it won't be as difficult as it sounds.  There are only twenty-four hours in a day and we'll probably spend at least eighteen of them napping.  It's pretty easy to be good while you're napping.  And since the peep is quite possibly 500 million years old, she'll probably be in need of a nap or two, too.  And when the peep's asleep...  Well, never you mind.  That's for cats to know and peeps to only possibly find out.

Anywho...  if you happen to talkin' to the peep the day after tomorrow, you might wanna wish her a Happy Birthday or somethin'.  But be sure to raise your voice really loudly and speak super clearly when doin' so 'cause...  well...  'CAUSE SHE'S AS OLD AS THE HILLS! 

47 comments:

  1. Wow we cannot believe it!
    Our Dad says he is "Older than Dirt" so he must be right there with your peep.
    Crazy. Who knew they have been around since the dawn.
    Purrs to the Peep!
    Timmy

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  2. Sooooo old? Are you sure they're not vampires?

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    1. No,vampires can not be vegetarian lol.And I am sure she is????? .....Um? Err? Okay I'm gonna be nice n' say....45? I am not sure....I am no where close to 45,myself LOL! I have a lot to go for!

      RM~

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  3. It's funny but our Mum says she is older than dirt too. Fancy your peep taking your ribbon away before her present was dressed up in fur and treat crumbs. They often do silly things though as they get older.
    Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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  4. Oh Nissy - I knoze you twied to be good and wrap prezzie - but temptation was just tooooo strong.
    Peep loves you anyway and will also love the prezzie - gives her nose kisses from me

    Belle

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  5. Gives her nose kisses from my brofur too - *turns head** ok, ok, @Fussyfussycat I told him

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  6. Hi Nissy, I just want to remind you to not tie the ribbon too tight, or put too much tape on the package. Make opening the gift as easy as possible for the one who is old as the hills. Like most people, she is still probbly younget than our peeps. - Scooter

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  7. Timmy Tomcat stole our comment. Our Mom is older than dirt, we know that for a fact. So being older than the hills is not so bad. We sure hope that the Mom has a great day. Take care.

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  8. Happy birthday to your old peep, Nerissa! Kitties trying to be good and a t-shirt and some seeds...sound like a great birthday!

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  9. Hi Nissy both my pawrents had purrdays this month and they were so old I couldn't even count that high. We hope your peep has a great birthday and we know you are going to help make it memorable!

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  10. From the comments we think there are a lot of VERY old peeps out there - ours included.

    The Florida Furkids

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  11. Well Nissy, I'm the first to admit that I truly AM older than dirt and it's not so bad after all to be that old! I hope your peep enjoys every minute of her birthday - birthdays are wonderful when you have great friends and YOU do and I do and that's the best present there is!

    Sammy sends HUGS and I do too!
    Pam

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  12. hehehe you're not supossed to ask a ladies age Nissy,xx Speedy

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  13. Nissy, I'm sure you'll think of something that doesn't involve dirt! Anyway your mom can't be any older than 39.

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    1. Ah yes... thirty-nine... I have heard that some peeps turn thirty-nine multiple times.

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  14. dood...yur mom iza wee babe if her bee az old as de hillz...R food serviss purrson wuz ther de day de wheel wuz act shoe a lee invented...her rememburss it well... aza pterodactyl flew bye...happee birth day ta yur mom; we hope her day is filled with best fishes, birthday wishes, cake N mice creem and yur dad gets her a 2014 FURRAreez car in red....ore green az de hills !!! XXX happee day nissy's mom, heers ta az manee mor az there bee hillz on earth !! ENJOY ~~~~~~~

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  15. Sheesh! Nissy if your ol' peeps is as old as the hills, then mine is as old as the mountains!!! I think they must elebenty billion years old!! Frightening! Pity she ain't as wise as her years, though!! Mouses!!!! ;)

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  16. Hmmm, This has gots mes to thinking...Kozmo is 3 this year, me is 16 next May, the hairy slobbery sister Bob was 13 in July and Jo-Jo is .25 of a year. Dad had a birthday in August and he was 63 his is older than Mommy. My Human Brother Kent turned 42 in August too...so Mommy is older than him so she is between 42 and 62 me shall has to do more investigating....
    Me will come back and sing your Mommy the Birthday Song!!!
    Kisses
    Nellie

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  17. Hope your mom has a wonderful birthday.
    Sue B

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  18. My human hates those derogatory terms about age like "old as the hills" and "older than dirt." She decided some decades ago to never get old, so these terms will never apply to her! All that said, your birthday presents to your human sound way better than what I've given mine the past couple of years - a hairball on the carpet. And, BTW, she never says "Thank you."

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  19. From one Peep to another I am as old as the hills too and when it is my turn to have a birthday I am tellin!!!
    Happy Birthday a little early

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  20. Our mom is older than dirt. Which is older, hills or dirt? We don't know. Do you? Mom says we'll do our best to get back to say happy birthday. If we blow it; though, we're going to say now, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY NISSY'S MOM." Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Maurico, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona,Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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  21. If your Peep is as old as the Hills, *MY* Peep must be as old as.....as old as.....as old as...well, I don't even *know* what. Pluto? Mercury? The SUN????

    Well, Happy Birfday to her anyway.

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  22. Sweet Nissy we lives with old peeps too. Sorry the ribbon was confiscated they are lots of fun to play with. At least you got to have fun shredding paper and working over the box. We bet your peep is going to love the prezzies. Hugs and nose kisses

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  23. We hope you Mom has a great birthday, no matter her age!

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  24. Can I say happy birthday to your peep now, if not typist will be forgetting and she doesn't have the excuse of being as old as the hills - she is just rubbish!!

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  25. Happy birthday to your peeps Nissy. We don't count the years anymore....we'd rather forget LOL. Have a tremendous Thursday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  26. We hope your human has a very lovely birthday!!

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  27. Hi Nissy, So did your Human have a fun Birfday? Good. Now all the attention should be back on you, where it belongs, eh?

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  28. Awwwwww happy happy happy birthday to your beautiful and young at heart Peeps! And what a lovely pressie you have for her sweet Nerissa!! Yay! Take care
    x

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  29. Happy Happy Birthday to your peep, however old! We hope it's a wonderful day :-)

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  30. Happy Birthday to your sweet peep, we hope she has a wonderful day with lots of loves and attention. Hugs and nose kisses

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  31. Happy Birthday to the Peep. Hope it is a great day.
    ~Melinda from Texas

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  32. Happy Buurrrrthday, Peep #1. Don't forget to give the kitties each a cuddle today.

    And relax, you don't look a day over 100 million years, whatever Nerissa says.

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  33. MOL! Nissy!
    I hope you're human is having a Super Happy Purrthday!
    Purrs

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  34. I just KNEW Peep#1 was gonna be like REALLY REALLY OLD! Mouses! great investigative work Nissy...hope she likes those seeds...you might want to get just a few more and scatter them around so she can have like a seed hunt on her birthday...heh...heh

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  35. Sending Happy Birthday purrs to the ol' peepers whom we suspect isn't all that old after all. Purrs....

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  36. Guys, maybe she is older than 'nip?

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  37. We comed back to say Happy Birfday to Ol Peepers! If we didded our Maff right the day after Wednesday is Friday and that's today. As far as we know, anyway. XOXO

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  38. Happy birthday to your mom, nissy! Stay healthy and bootiful!

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  39. Happy happy birthday! You are only as old as you feel! Me-ommmmmm

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  40. I am here! Sorry I didn't get over here yesterday! HAPPY BELATE BIRTH DAY!!!:-)

    Ragdoll mommy~

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.