Two nights ago, my brother Seville did not come home. The peep called him and called him and called him but there was no sign of that big ol' marmalade dude. Not a trace. Finally, she had to give up. She told me what a good boy I was coming in even though staying out in the mild - gosh, it was downright balmy - night air must have been tempting. She picked me up and hugged me and kissed me 'til I squirmed and thanked me for being such a good boy. I thanked her lettin' me down eventually 'cause the kisses were getting suffocating.
Well, you can imagine how frantic my peeps were - especially peep #1 'cause she franticifies so easily - when Seville wasn't waiting to get in at the window, yesterday morning. Out she went, calling and calling and calling some more.
Now, you know how my peep does her caterwauling thing, right? Yeah... some people call it choral society practise but I call like I see it. Or in this case, hear it. It's caterwauling! Anyway, I guess all that caterwauling practise has paid off 'cause when peep #1 calls for any of us cats, you can hear her for miles. I'm not exaggerating. Once, peep #2 was on the phone with a friend in Washington DC while the first peep was calling for one of us. The friend, hundreds and hundreds of miles and a whole country away asked, "What's that!" Well, that was my peep caterwauling! See? She can be heard for miles. Yeah, I know... you're thinking the phone helped but really, the phone probably wasn't necessary. She's that loud. And the sound just kind of travels.
You know... now that I think about it... I should get the peep to give a call out to the International Space Station. I'm still lookin' for an astronaut up there to read my blog, you know. Hard to believe as it is, I haven't yet had one. I bet if the peep crawled up onto the roof of my house and called in that space and time travelling voice of hers, those ol' astronauts would hear her. I was watching The Big Bang Theory not that long ago and Howard was up there and thought he could hear his mom's voice from Earth without the phone or whatever it is astronauts use. My peep's voice isn't as irritating as Howard's mom's but I'm sure it's just as loud. Oh and don't worry about the peep bein' up on the roof. It's not scary up there or anything. I go up there all the time.
Anywho... the peep was out there calling for my brother yesterday morning. It wasn't long before my sister Beatrice appeared by her feet. Then, my brother Rushton. Once Mason was there I had to join in, myself. The peep thinks this is kind of cute when we all appear like that and wonders why we don't know our names. We know our names, you ol' peep. We're just coming over to tell you to be quiet. Those of us with sensitive ears are extremely sensitive to the caterwauling.
Once, a few weeks ago, my peep was out there calling for my brother Rushton and who arrives on the scene? Nosey neighbour cat, that's who. There he was, rubbing up against her ankles, trying to ingratiate himself into her good books. I tell you, those two bonded when the peep looked after him for that week back in August. It's disgusting, really.
But what's in a name? You call for a cat, you get a cat. Okay, maybe it's not the right cat. The cat you were calling for. But it's a cat! Just be happy with what you get, peep. That's what I say.
Eventually though, the peep's calling did work. A couple of hours later, Seville arrived. He didn't appear upset or anything. He just sauntered toward the peep and when he got close enough to her he asked, "You were looking for me?" He acted like it was the first time he had heard her calling all morning. Yeah, like that's possible. I'm surprised the neighbours hadn't called the police! Noise pollution or something.
Well, Seville got his punishment, all right. I saw it with my very own eyes and am still cringing at the memory. He got scooped up into that ol' peep's arms and he was kissed all over the top of his head. Then he was cuddled and hugged and kissed some more. Oohhh... oohhhh... the horror! All that kissing. All those peep germs. My poor brother.
After my brother was punished with all the kisses, he was carried inside the house like a baby and given extra yummy food. Of course, we all went in for some, too. It was only fair as when the peep had called for Seville earlier, we had all responded. The peep tried telling us that we had all had our breakfast and that Seville needed his. I explained to the peep, in no uncertain terms, the reality of the situation. I explained to her that if Seville's name was good enough for us earlier, then it should be good enough for her, now. We came when she called for Seville outside, so we should all reap the rewards for answering her call. I'm not sure that she bought the explanation I gave her but she gave us some of the extra yummy food, anyway. I say, if I have to answer to Seville's name on occasion to get the good stuff, I will. After all, I mean... really... what's in a name?