Yeah, I'm a week late with this post. Sorry 'bout that.
Some of you - okay, most of you, 'cause like I said, I'm a week late with this post - may already know that June 24th was World Cat Domination Day. We cats are so very fortunate that Sparkle from the world famous blog, Sparkle the Designer Cat was given this event as his tenth birthday present. What a great gift, huh? I mean, let's face it... we all know that cats are taking over the world but... well... this just makes it all official.
Closer to home, I've been taking over some stuff myself. For instance, several months ago, I took over the peep's twitter account. She started it up for herself last November but within a couple of weeks, it was my account... all mine. And what an improvement my taking over the account made. She had, like, thirty followers or something like that. I have well over twelve hundred... almost thirteen! People like cats. No, people love cats. Once cats and their peeps out there knew the account belonged to a cat, the followers appeared. How great is that? I'll answer that question. Super great, I think.
But it doesn't end there. The other morning, the peep went to check on her e-mail and there were over one hundred messages. I guess she was thinking to herself that she had become oh-so-popular overnight. Well think again peep #1. Almost every one of those e-mails was for me. That's right... me! You see, between my twitter account, my facebook page and my blog, I'm one pretty popular cat. It's only a matter of time, I think, before that e-mail address is officially mine, too. Only a matter of time...
Here in Canada, today is a special holiday. It's Canada Day! Yeah, my country - the one in which I was born - is having a birthday. Not much of one though, from what I can see. I woke up this morning expecting all sorts of wonderful birthday celebrations for such a wonderful day celebrating such a wonderful country but there wasn't a catnip plant in sight. Can you imagine that? No nip on a birthday? Who's running this shindig anyway? Obviously, it's not a cat. If it were, there would be cat treats and birthday cake made of Fancy Feast pate and cream and nip. Oh, there would be lots and lots of nip. There would be great fields of the stuff. A sea of nip. Oh, what a wonderful sight that would be to behold. Of course, we cats might all be in a state of perpetual highness from all the nip but that's a chance I'm willing to take.
I'm thinking that we cats need to start our domination of the world here in Canada. We need to take over Ottawa, I think. I'm sure we could do better. Scratch that... I'm positive we could do better. First thing to do is pass a law that people grow more of the nip. Yes, we'll call it the Nepeta cataria law. Every garden in the country should be required to grow at least one patch of the stuff. As for farmers' fields? Well, let's convert one percent of all fields into nip growing ones. One percent isn't a lot. I think a law like this would be more than fair. And, of course, the law must provide for equal access of the nip to all cats. Hey, I'm even willing to throw in some access to dogs and bunnies if they're interested. Don't think they are but laws should be fair to everybody, you know.
So, that's my plan. We cats should start dominating the world right here in Canada. Sparkle, my friend, thanks so much for getting the ball rolling on this one. By Canada Day next year, there will be fields of nip growing in this great country. Nip for all. Oh, what a happy Canada Day that would be.