Can't stop now. GOTTA RUN. MOUSES!
Whew! That was a close one, for sure.
Let me catch my breath.
Okay, I bet you're all wonderin' what has my tail all twisted up in a dither. Well the thing is... The thing is... Well...
Well it all began the other day.
The other day, I happened to notice Peep #1's Facebook status. "Livin' room looks like the aftermath of a catnip toy factory explosion," or somethin' like that. I didn't think too much about it at the time because, truth be told, it did. I figured the peep was just - you know - makin' a public service announcement of some sort.
But then that night, I was watchin' television, and I heard the TV peeps talkin' about Boxin' Day Blowouts and the like. I assumed they were talkin' about the sales after Christmas but... But... But combined with the peep talking 'bout catnip toy factory explosions... Well... Well...
Well my mind got to thinkin', and when I start thinkin', I start...
No, I do not start smokin' at the ears.
When I start thinkin', I start connectin' the dots.
NO. Not the red dots. The elusive red dot is far too elusive to be connected to anythin'. MOUSES!
But back to those other dots.
My mind was a whirlin' like the peep with a Cat Teaser toy, after her fourth cup of coffee.
Talk of a catnip toy factory explosion led to explosions, which led to blowouts, which led to Boxin' Day blowouts which, of course, led to Boxin' Day, which led to BOXES.
NOW I bet you're gettin' the picture, for sure.
And then if that wasn't bad enough, I heard the peep say somethin' about cleanin' up the mess in the livin' room.
Well I got to thinkin' once more. Had any of us cats tossed our cookies in the livin' room since Christmas Day? Not that we actually ate any cookies to toss, but even so, we are not immune to tossing 'em without eating 'em, if you know what I mean.
But as the answer to the cookie tossin' question was no, I had to ask myself if any of us kitties had made any other messes in there. Had any of us pooped or peed where poopin' and peein' is not to be done?
Again, the answer was no.
So what the mouses was the peep talkin' about when she said mess?
And then... And then... And then...
And then it hit me like a tonne of bricks.
PEEP #1 WAS PLANNIN' ON CLEANIN' UP ALL OF OUR TOYS. MOUSES!
But deep down, I knew that wasn't the case, because those toys are ours and no one - I repeat, NO ONE - can clean 'em up on account of their not bein' dirty.
But what if... What if... What if...
What if she was gonna clean up all the other stuff? You know, like the tissue paper and worse than that...
So that, my friends, is the reason for my bein' so out of breath. I've been runnin' around, rescuing boxes from Peep #1. Rescuing 'em before the peep can get at 'em with the box cutter, and bag 'em all up for recycling.
Not that I consider recyclin' to be a bad thing. I don't! As a responsible citizen of this world, I consider recycling to be absolutely necessary.
AS LONG AS THEY'RE NOT RECYCLIN' MY BOXES. MOUSES!
So anyway, I don't know 'bout you, but my post Boxin' Day rush has been a real doozie, for sure.
What's that, Mason? I missed a box? And the peep has spotted it? And she has the box cutter in her paws?
Excuse me, my friends. It appears that my post Boxin' Day rush is not yet over. MOUSES!