Happy Birthday to me.
Happy Birthday to me.
Happy Birthday to MEE-EEE....
Happy Birthday to...
What's that, Peepers? What did you say?
It's not my birthday?
It isn't? Really? Are you absolutely sure?
But technically, it could be my birthday. It's not like you actually know the actual day I was born. I mean, I arrived at the back door already all grown-up, so there's a good chance today IS my birthday after all.
What's that, Peepers? The chance of today bein' my actual birthday isn't actually good?
Whatever do you mean?
A one in three hundred and sixty-five chance, huh? Three hundred and sixty-five... And you say that doesn't take into account the fact that January isn't kitten season here in Canada. And that makes it even less likely. Hmmm...
Well it's somebody's birthday! I'm sure there's someone out there whose birthday it is. Like uh... Um... Uh...
I know! It's that Baby New Year's birthday, today. You know the one. The baby in the diapers. Looks a little like my pal Cupid, 'cept without the wings. And no bow and arrow. And I don't think he can fly or anythin'. And uh... Um... Sometimes he wears a big ol' top hat and... Hmmm...
But they do look a lot alike. I mean, they both wear diapers. In public. Don't bother covering 'em up or anythin'. MOUSES!
Baby New Year... The personification of the birth of the new year. 2017 is all of one day old. Well almost. Almost, here in Canada. Guess he won't really be a whole day old 'til tomorrow, right?
But back to my birthday.
Peepers, I don't see why we can't just say that January 1st is my birthday. I mean, odds or no odds... By the way, if you have no odds, does that make the odds better?
But I digress.
Fact is Peepers, as of right now, I don't have an actual birthday. I don't have an actual date of birth. And yet, I was born, and so I must.
So why the mouses can't we just say January 1st is my birthday and be done with it?
Do I have to explain everythin' to you, Peepers?
Everyone celebrates New Year's Day, BIG time. It's even a holiday in most places. So if I choose January 1st to be MY birthday, then everyone will be celebratin' on my birthday, and in a way, they'll be celebratin' me. All those New Year's Eve parties will be celebratin' my birthday to come. And then at the stroke of midnight, they'll be cheerin' my arrival. Then on New Year's Day, they'll be sayin' "HAPPY NEW YEAR!" which will kinda be like code for "Happy Birthday Sivvers!" 'cause you know, it'll be my birthday and everythin'.
What do you mean it doesn't work that way?
WELL IT SHOULD.
And you're sure that if I choose January 1st to be my birthday, New Year's Day won't be all about me?
You're quite positive 'bout that, huh? Hmmm...
Well I'm not gonna let that stop me from wishin' all my pals a Happy New Year.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!
And if my pals wanna wish me a Happy Birthday back, I'm okay with that. Yup, I'm okay with that, for sure. And please, feel free to send nip. MOUSES!