Sunday, 18 September 2016

quiet, you two

Be quiet, you two. MOUSES!

You know, a kitty makes a little noise at two o'clock in the mornin', and a kitty never hears the end of it.  But a peep makes a LOT of noise at eleven o'clock in the mornin', which is PRIME nappin' time, thank you very much, and thinks the kitties are bein' demandin' when they're asked to hush up.

Hush up...  Hush Puppies...  Hmmm...

Never mind, I've got nothin' for that.  At least not right now.  Perhaps I'll come back to it later. MOUSES!

But I would have somethin' to say 'bout that, if peeps had allowed me to enjoy my late morning - not to be confused with my early morning - nap in peace.

A kitty can't think straight when not allowed to get in both their morning naps.  MOUSES!

You know, we kitties need our sleep.  It's how we maintain our beauty, you see.

Well technically, that's not entirely true.  I mean, we kitties do need our sleep, but not to maintain our beauty.  We're NATURALLY beautiful, whether we get all twenty hours shut-eye in or not. Peeps, on the other paw, require copious amounts of beauty sleep, and even then, more often than not, they don't get enough.  Not nearly enough to be as beautiful as cats.  MOUSES!

But like I was sayin', I was tryin' to get in my late mornin' nap, when Peep #1 decided to make a whole whack of noise.  And Peep #2 joined Peep #1 and together, they made even more.

Apparently, they were havin' a conversation.

But did they have to have their conversation in the very same room where I was tryin' to have my nap?

No way, no how, could any stupid conversation between peeps possibly be as important as my late mornin' nap.  MOUSES!

Has no one ever told 'em to let sleepin' cats lie?  MOUSES!

Actually, that might have a different meanin' than what I mean for it to mean.

But anyway, I would have covered my ears with my paws, to keep out their incessant chatter, had my paws not already been busy coverin' my eyes, as SOMEONE had turned on the light.  Plus, you know, it was already daytime.

And although any conversation durin' my late-mornin' nap would have been bad, this one was particularly loud, and therefore badder than most.

Is badder even a word?  Hmmm....

Well word or not, it sounds like it means what I mean it to mean, so I'm usin' it right here and right now, for sure.  MOUSES!

So with my paws coverin' my eyes, I let out a loud meow.  "QUIET, YOU TWO!" I said.  Yelled. Whatever.

Well that did it.  Next thing I know, Peep #1 is bringin' up the two o'clock in the mornin' hijinks one of my fursibs and I had.

Like it's MY fault a peep can't sleep through a two in the mornin' hallway relay race, followed by a good ol' session of smacky paws.  MOUSES!

And speakin' of sleepin' through stuff, why just the other day, I heard the peeps complaining 'bout how they couldn't find a decent alarm clock.

Uh, HELLO?  Excuse me, but...  How many times have we cats awakened you peeps, BETTER than any alarm clock ever could, and got NOTHIN' for our troubles but complaints.  MOUSES!

Why just this mornin', around two o'clock or so...

Of course, cats don't necessarily awaken anyone at the time they want to be awakened, but that's neither here nor there, as it's far too trivial a matter to occupy the mind of a cat.  MOUSES!

But let me tell you somethin'.  When it comes to nappin', Anderson can nap with the best of 'em, for sure.

Whether it's early mornin'; late mornin'; early, mid or late afternoon; when Andy decides it's time for one of his naps, Andy takes it.  Peeps can be standin' right there beside him and Andy snoozes right on through.  Even when they say his name.  When they say it loudly, too!

Of course, open a bag of treats and Andy wakes with a start, dashes through the house, and arrives in the kitchen with his mouth wide open.

Nope, a peep can't open a bag of treats within a fifty-foot radius of Andy, without Andy hearin' said act, for sure.

A bag of treats is like Anderson's personal beeper, you see.  MOUSES!

Good thing, too, on account of Andy not wearin' clothes, and therefore not havin' any pockets in which to carry any other kind of beeper.  MOUSES!

But back to those hush puppies I mentioned earlier.

Now if you tell a puppy to hush, will it?  Or is it like with peeps.  Like with peeps havin' conversations durin' your late-mornin' nap, where you have to yell, "QUIET, YOU TWO!"

What's that, Peepers?  Hushpuppies are some kind of deep-fried food?  And a brand of shoes?

Say that again, Peepers.  YOU SAY PEOPLE ARE DEEP-FRYIN' AND EATIN' THEIR SHOES?

Bet those are tougher than the toughest of beef jerkies, for sure.  MOUSES!

Peepers, that's the craziest thing I have ever, EVER heard.  Crazier than squirrels makin' nut pies kind of crazy, for sure.  Peeps eatin' shoes and wearin' deep-fried food on their feet. Haha!  MOUSES!

Hmmm...  I wonder if Peep #1's lack of beauty sleep, due to my two o'clock in the mornin' relay race down the hallway and later smacky paw session, is causin' her to hallucinate.  Could be.  I know it's 'causin' her to be less than beautiful this mornin', for sure.  MOUSES!

32 comments:

  1. How totally unreasonable... I mean, to have an active alarm clock is the absolute must for any discerning household, and peeps should rise to the occasion and join the fun. purrs ERin PS an inquiring Princess such as I wants to know, was it a four paw by four paw smacky paw relay, and who won?

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    1. No winners on the relay front, I'm afraid, except for the fact that had lots of fun. Of course, that would make us ALL winners, in a way. Nice. MOUSES!

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  2. Seville, we are constantly amazed that humans do not care
    that they disturb our sleep. They act like it is not important :o
    But let us disturb theirs...
    Sheesh!
    Purrs Georgia and Julie,
    Treasure and JJ

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    1. I know! I KNOW! It's hard to believe they can be SO hypocritical and yet, they are. MOUSES!

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  3. The peeps really don't bother me my, I've learned to snooze right through their noise. Hey, I've tried eating shoes before, but not deep fried!

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    1. I'm thinkin' the sheoes might not be quite as tough, once fried. MOUSES!

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  4. Our Nin use to sing in the night. We never appreciated it enough!

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    1. Ballads? Did she sing ballads at night? purrs

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  5. Maybe the deep frying would make those shoes a little more tender? In any case, you're right ... peeps can be so rude about interrupting our sleeps. MOUSES!

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  6. Humans only think about their own comfort - they don't consider how much they disturb us kitties.

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    1. So true. SO true. They disturb us ALL the time, never giving it a second thought. MOUSES!

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  7. How can humans disturb our naps so often but complain when we wake them up occasionally ? Have a good week ! Purrs

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    1. I know! Sometimes, when I'm tryin' to get in a nap, it's like Grand Central Station 'round here. MOUSES!

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  8. Seville, mew need earplugs dude, that will solve all these little niggles!!! MOL

    Purrs

    Basil & Co xox

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    1. I need A WHOLE CASE of 'em, for sure. MOUSES!

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  9. I feel for you Seville. It's not the chatter that bothers me as much as turning on the lights when I am in the middle of a good dream, and about to catch the biggest tastiest mouse you ever saw. If my peeps have to get out in the middle of the night, you can be sure they have dimmed the lights as low as they will go. No blinding lights for them like I have to put up with.

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    1. Oh, that's THE WORST. Disturbed during a good mouse-chasin' dream? MOUSES!

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  10. Eating shoes??? Me thought they were just fur smelling. And peeples should hush their puppies and let you sleep.
    -Ellie May who likes smelling shoes.

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    1. I like smelling 'em, too. Of course, I also like Valerian Root. MOUSES!

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  11. Peeps can be so rude. It is bad enough they don't appreciate your alarm clock services, but then to have the nerve to interrupt a nap is unacceptable.

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  12. They just don't appreciate you, do they?

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    1. They most certainly don't. I'm gonna have to complain more about that. MOUSES!

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  13. "Like it's MY fault a peep can't sleep through a two in the mornin' hallway relay race, followed by a good ol' session of smacky paws."
    Hahahahaha. Oh, Seville, you crack us up every time. Peeps just have no clue, do they? ~Bear Cat

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    1. Nope. A clue could be standin' right there, in front of their faces, and they STILL wouldn't know it was a clue. MOUSES!

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  14. How totally rude!
    Never mess with a cat nap!

    Noodle and crew

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    1. Rude should be my Peep #1's middle name. Hmmm... I wonder if it is! MOUSES!

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  15. My main nap of the day *does* begin around 11:00 or 11:30. I sleep hard till about 6:00 when I get up for a little stroll and a snack and then the nap continues till about 10:00 or so. That worked great in the Summer when the Human would stay up and play with me till 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning, but NOW, well, NOW she says at about 10:30, "Sorry Spitty, gotta go to bed cause I have to get up for work in the morning." As if! If she loved me shed stay up and play with me even if it *would* make her tired the next day. Who cares about that??? She can just take a NAP, like all right-thinking beings. Right?????

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    1. Right. You're gonna have to rework her schedule, I think. Perhaps you can do that right after your next nap. PURRS

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  16. I have Mom L and Dad P trained. They tip toe around to make sure they don't disturb me when I am nappin. I leave the AM waking up alarm to TKS. She does it really well

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    1. Oohhh... How does Sage wake up your peeps? Any special pointers for the rest of us cats? purrs

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