Sunday, 3 April 2016

he started it

HE STARTED IT.

There was an incident.

Well I'm calling it an incident.  Peep #1 is calling it an all-out brawl but what does she know? She wouldn't know a brawl if she walked into the middle of one and it smacked her upside the head.  I mean, it's not like she participates in brawls on a regular basis or anything like that.  I don't even know if she has ever participated in one. Maybe she has NEVER participated in a brawl and if so, she's hardly qualified to determine if something is one or not.  In fact, she's not qualified at all!  All-out brawl...  MOUSES!

Anyway, there was a brawl.

I MEAN INCIDENT!

Now the peep has me confused and everything.  MOUSES!

So there was this incident involving a couple of marmalade cats, one of whom might have been me.  Okay, FINE.  One of 'em was me but I'm telling you right here and right now...  It wasn't my fault.  Plus, he started it, for sure.

So the peep took me aside and gave me a 'talking to'.  You ever have a peep give you a talking to? Let me tell you, it's something I intend to avoid in the future.

She was all like, "What do you think you're doing?"

And I was all like, "He started it!"

And then she was all like, "I don't care who started it.  You should have put an end to it."

And I was all like, "That's what I was trying to do when I gave him the smacky paws."

And then she was all like, "Giving your brother the smacky paws is no way to put an end to a fight,"

And I was all like, "IT IS IF YOU SMACK 'EM HARD ENOUGH!"

And then she was all like, "You're the oldest boy, Seville, and as a world-famous blogging kitty, you have a lot of responsibilities resting on your shoulders.  I expect you to take the high road when things like this happen."

And I was all like, "Take the high road!  You mean like walk along the top of the deck wall instead of walking across the deck itself?  What does that have to do with giving my brother the smacky paws? MOUSES!"

And that was when the peep threw her arms up in the air and walked out of the room.  'Bout time, too. Needed to get back to my...  um...  incident.

To be perfectly honest, I'm not really sure who started the brawl...  I mean, incident.  One smacky paw led to another which led to another which led to another which led to some growling which led to some howling which led to Peep #1 racing into the room which finally led to that talking to.  I actually have NO IDEA who threw the first paw.  It's not like it was all caught on tape or something for the peep to watch later, like in a hockey game or whatever, and for that, my friends, I can be truly thankful, for if the peep were ever to start setting up hidden cameras around here, goodness knows what she might catch me doing when I thought no one was looking.  MOUSES!

But back to that incident.

Truth be told, I have no idea what it was even about.  It's not like Rushton said, "Yo, Sivvers!  Your mama wears army boots."  Not like he said anything like that, at all.  And I'm almost certain I didn't say that to him.

Now it might have been 'cause I told him I was gonna spill the beans on him and I have to admit, I did do that.

Well technically, I spilled the beans on him.

Oh yeah, that's what I said!

Yeah, I was up on the island and the peep had this container of jelly beans, left over from Easter, up there.  Well the lid wasn't on properly and the container was clear plastic so I could see through it and it was very obvious that those beans looked like they might be rollable beans on account of their having some roundness to them in parts.  So I got the thing open and spilled the beans onto the island.  A number of 'em rolled off the island and as Rushton just happened to be hanging around on the floor down there, those beans spilled right on top of him, so yeah, technically I did spill the beans on him, after all.  He wasn't too thrilled with that but it's not like I did it on purpose or anything.  MOUSES!

Okay, you've got me there.  I did spill the beans on purpose.  It was the part about spilling 'em on Rushton that was by accident.  MOUSES!

On the other paw, maybe he just looked at me the wrong way.  Or maybe I looked at him the wrong way.  Like I said earlier, I'm really not sure who threw that first paw.

Peep #1 wanted to know if I had a learned a lesson and I said, "Lesson! Who said anything about school?"

But truth be told - and let's just keep this between us 'cause I wouldn't want the peep thinking she had taught me anything - I did learn a lesson from this little incident.  I learned that if you're gonna have an incident with a marmalade brother, make sure you do so without any peeps finding out. Incidents are one thing but those talkings to?  Those talkings to are pretty much the most awful things to happen to blogging marmalade kitties, ever.  MOUSES!

38 comments:

  1. Our servant had to use a broom to break us up once. Because all she could see was a furious ball of CAT. Calo and Sammi, reporting from the Bridge <3 <3

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  2. I so agree, Sivvers. I had a talking to from my Mom today as well. You see, I BIT her, through her thick sweater and turtleneck and made marks for FOUR teeth! And all she was doing was putting me down and rearranging by blankie.

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    1. Maybe she touched you on a sore spot or something. You have any of those? purrs

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  3. Oh my cat - you DID get a talking to! Oooh boy, it's the beans!!!

    Our sisfur Natasha does the kiwi version called 'wavy paws' and SHE gets a talking to as well *eyeroll*

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    1. You call 'em wavy paws there, huh? Those work the same? purrs

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  4. I though humans only got upset over spilled milk, but beans??? MOUSES fur sure!

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    1. Turns out, they get upset by both. Who knew? purrs

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  5. Me and Ernie have had some knock-down, drag-out fights and it gets us put into time out. Don't get put into time out. It's no fun at all. ~Wally

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    1. Time out? You willingly stay in a corner when your peeps put you in time out or are there doors involved... Hmmm... purrs.

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  6. Sorry to hear about the incident. Being you are a famous kitty, your peep needs to get you a security guard so there are no more incidences.

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    1. You know something? I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT! purrs

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  7. We totally agree. Best to keep your incidents to a time and place that your peeps won't find out. Of course, if you have any tattlers in your house, your still bound to get a talking to. MOUSES! XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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    1. Yeah, a couple of 'em DO like to tattle, for sure. MOUSES!

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  8. Yup, you're definitely right, Sivvers. Peeps are best when they don't find out about these incidents!

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    1. What they don't know won't hurt 'em and all that stuff. Right? purrs

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  9. You can't get along with everybody all the time, Seville - spats are just part of life. Humans should realize that, considering the spats they get into.

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    1. You are SO RIGHT, my friend. Peeps get into way more spats than kitties could ever dream of getting into and that is for sure. MOUSES!

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  10. Hehehe. You know, Seville, seems like your incident didn't amount to a hill of beans either! Well maybe a small pile on Ruston. Great post. purrs from your pal ERin

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    1. Those spilled beans didn't really pile up on Rushy. Rolled right of his back and everything. purrs

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  11. We're sorry you got a talking to ! Incidents happen sometimes, but we agree : it's better if they happen without any humans. Purrs

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    1. Yes, I believe you are right. Best to have our little incidents away from the prying eyes of the peeps, for sure. purrs

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  12. My mum used to have 3 brothers, two were house panthers and one was a tuxie. They all loved each other mostly, but every now and again they would fight like crazy with fur flying and screaming their heads off. When they had finished they would all go on the bed together and sleep like best buds again. Crazy!!!

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    1. And life is like that, isn't it. No need for the peeps to get into a dither when it's just something that happens. purrs

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  13. Now you have us jealous. We've never been able to spill the beans on each other, not even by accident. Does your brother know how fortunate he was it happened to him? He could have counted the beans, eaten some beans, played hockey with the beans, but no, he got into an incident. sigh.

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    1. Playing hockey with the beans would have been fun! purrs

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  14. You are lucky you has a brother to play smacky paws with or put the blame on. I has no one, so I'm the one M ALWAYS yells at. She did say the other night to a friend tho, now that I'm older, I hardly ever get into anything. In fact, she said I'm too lazy to get into anything to play with it! Pfffft Can you believe it? I tell you, these humans are getting out of hand!

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  15. Yeah Seville me's had more than one of those talkin' to's and they ain't all they be cracked up to be. Hope nopawdy got hurt in da brawl. Uh, me means incident.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi

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    1. We all survived the INCIDENT unscathed. purrs

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  16. BwA! HAA!!! HaaA!!!
    Now that mes gots nobody to smacky paws with mes can laughs and mes can says that!!
    And Seville, mes KNOWS that even if yous spilled the beans, its ALWAYS the other cats' fault...no matter what Mommys says!
    Kisses
    Nellie (on the other coast)

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    1. That's true. ALWAYS the OTHER cat's fault, for sure. MOUSES!

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  17. We don't understand how the humans always blame one of us when something happens. We happen to like a little game of smacky paws.

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    1. Yeah, what's wrong with a few smacky paws between friends? MOUSES!

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  18. I get that talking to every time I charge TKS for no reason and deliver a smack or three. She gets time outs, which is easier I think

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    1. Oh yeah, a time out without the talking to would be easier, for sure. MOUSES!

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