Wednesday, 24 December 2014

the naughty list

Thinking he heard an odd sound, Nissy stopped typing.  Silence.  "Nothin' there," and he shook his head.  "Must be hearin' things or somethin'."  He went back to work on his blog post but moments later, there was another sound.  Twitching his ears back as far as they would go, Niss hit save on the computer.  "I had best go check that out," and he padded toward the basement door. Creeping down the stairs, Nerissa peered around the corner.

"ALL ABOARD!" someone cried.

"SIVVERS!" Nerissa hollered.  "What the mouses is that...  that...  that train doin' in our basement?"

"I had nothing to do with it, Niss.  I...  Um...  I uh..." Seville stammered.

Nerissa stomped over to the opening in the basement wall and gave the train engine a kick with a paw.  "Ouch!  Seville, you've been messin' with whisks again, haven't you?  This here is a time vortex.  A TIME VORTEX!  You've gone and opened a time vortex in the basement wall!  When Peep #1 finds out about this..."

"But it wasn't me!  I'm telling you, Niss, I didn't do it.  At least not this time, anyway."

Nerissa stared hard at his brother before pointing to a whisk lying on the floor.  "Oh yeah?  Then where did that whisk come from, huh?  You gonna deny..."

"But that's not mine!"  Seville held up two whisks, one in each paw.  "See?  I admit that I was tinkering with the teleportation device, trying to increase the whisk eggbeater differential accleration ratio but I only had the two whisks.  That one there is a plant.  Someone is tryin' to frame me.  I swear!"

At that very moment, an elf hopped down from the train.  "Did someone say time vortex?  As in time travel?  Tsk, tsk, tsk...  Well that certainly explains how I made such good time getting here. But it doesn't explain why I ended up here.  Here in this...  basement," the elf sneered.

"Nothin' wrong with our basement," and Nerissa glared at the elf.  "Exactly who are you and how did you end up in my basement?"

"Colton , Sir.  At your service," and the elf stood at attention.  "I'm in charge of acquiring the coal Santa needs to fill the stockings for the children on his Naughty List, each year."  He slumped down onto the floor.  "I don't know what happened.  I negotiated a contract with a new mine and had no problems getting the needed coal but this map to get me home proved useless. Instead of taking me back to the North Pole it led me...  HERE!" and he flung his arms and the map up into the air.

Nerissa snatched the map off the floor and immediately noticed sticky paw prints all over it.  "From whom exactly did you purchase this map, Colton?"

"The Weasel Syndicate, of course," Colton snapped.  "Everyone knows they're the go-to guys when you need something in a hurry."

"That's true, Niss," piped up Seville.  "During the world-wide eggbeater shortage a while back, the only place I could get eggbeaters for our eggbeater-whisk time travelling-teleportation technology was the Weasel Syndicate.  That's where I bought those refurbished egg..."  Seville slapped a paw to his mouth.  "I tried to return the eggbeaters when they all started falling apart but the weasels wouldn't give me a refund.  Apparently, all sales are final."

Nerissa looked at his brother.  "Okay, seems like you're not entirely to blame for this fiasco, Seville. Clearly this is some sort of retribution by the Weasel Syndicate."  He bent down to inspect a rolled up piece of paper on the floor.  Seeing that it was Santa's Naughty List, he added, "We need to do something 'bout this train, though.  If we're not careful, we'll end up on this list."

"You're probably already on it," smiled Colton.  "The list is magic.  Names appear and disappear, automatically.  Creating a situation where Santa's coal train was drawn into your basement and away from the North Pole sounds like reason for the Naughty List to add your names to its ranks."

"BUT I WAS FRAMED!" Seville cried.

"Doesn't matter," grinned Colton.  "Naughty is naughty and the list always knows."

"And I..." began Nerissa.

"Naughty by association," Colton stated.  Unrolling the list he pointed to the bottom.  "I was right. There you are.  Nerissa the Cat and Seville.  Looks like you'll both be getting lumps of coal in your stockings this year."

"Awww...  MOUSES!"  Nerissa sat back on his haunches.  "But what if we were to help you find your way back to the North Pole?  Do you think that would get us off the list?"

Colton thought for a moment.  "It might.  Do you have an accurate map?"

"I have better than that," Nerissa grinned.  "I have a radioactive reindeer dust tracking compass!  Be right back."

Moments later, Nissy returned carrying his compass.  "I use this to track all reindeer activity in Nova Scotian airspace each December but I think I can use it to track our path back to the North Pole."  He peered into the tunnel.  "Yup, just as I thought.  The confined space of the tunnel is magnifying the effect of the dust's radioactivity.  It's like a beacon pointing to the North Pole.  When we encounter diverging tunnels, the compass will tell us which one to take."

"I'll take that," and Colton grabbed at the compass but Nissy drew back his paw.

"No way, Colton.  I'm not lettin' this out of my sight.  Seville and I are coming with you.  I wanna make sure our names disappear from that list."

The two cats and the elf began their long journey to the North Pole. Nerissa and Seville kept themselves entertained by singing Christmas carols while Colton recited the names on the Naughty List.

Seville leaned over and whispered in Nissy's ear, "I think the elf thinks he's one of those actors who can recite the telephone directory and sound interesting."

"A phone book would be far more interestin', I should think," was Nissy's reply.

After what seemed like days but was really about forty-five minutes, the three finally arrived at the North Pole.  "And I suppose you'll be wanting to meet with Santa, yourself?" Colton asked Nissy.

"Of course.  Gotta make sure my brother and I are off that Naughty List and back onto the Nice one."

"Why of course you're on the Nice List, Nerissa.  You came all the way here to the North Pole just to find that out?  Whatever made you think you wouldn't be?" Santa asked.

"Well 'cause of...  Um...  Never mind, Santa.  Not important, really."  Nerissa pressed his lips together, hoping he hadn't given Santa any ideas.

Turning to leave, Nerissa stopped in his tracks.  "Santa?" he asked.

"Yes, Nerissa?"

"Uh, I don't know how to get home.  I don't think Seville and I can get back to Nova Scotia usin' the same way we got here.  You have any eggbeater teleportation devices handy?"

"HO! HO!! HO!!!" Santa laughed.  "We don't use eggbeater teleportation technology up here at the North Pole, little one."  Smiling, he bent down to scratch behind Nissy's ear.  "But I'll tell you what I can do.  I can loan you and your brother a reindeer and sleigh to take you home.  You'll be back with your peeps in the twitch of a whisker."

"That would be great, Santa!" and Nerissa began to purr.  "We'd appreciate that a whole lot.  THANK YOU!"

"Quite all right, my friend.  And Nerissa..."

"Yes, Santa?" Nissy replied.

"Nerissa, you and your brother might want to brush some of that Naughty List coal dust off your fur before you return home.  I can't imagine your Peep #1 will want you tracking that into the house."

"Yes Sir.  Santa...  Sir.... Uh...  Yup, I'll get right on that." and Nissy hurried off to find the waiting reindeer and sleigh, wondering exactly how much of his recent activities Santa knew.

"MOUSES!" Nissy whispered aloud to himself.  "I wonder if Santa knows 'bout my radioactive reindeer dust tracking compass.  I wonder if I'm even allowed to have such a thing.  Hmmm.... Best not to mention it to anyone.  Bad enough that that elf already knows."

And as Nerissa and Seville's borrowed sleigh took flight, Nissy was sure he heard a joyous cry of...

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL 
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

90 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you, too. This is your first one, huh? MERRY CHRISTMAS! purrs

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  2. Great story Nissy! A true Christmas classic!!! I absolutely loved it!

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    1. I'm hopin' some peeps will read it to their little ones, tonight. purrs

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  3. Replies
    1. And Merry Christmas to you, too! purrs

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    1. Yup, tomorrow is the big day and tonight is the big guy in red's busiest night of the year. MERRY CHRISTMAS! purrs

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  5. Tee...heh...heh...Funny !
    Meowry Christmas to you & fameowly too :)

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    1. And a very Meowry Christmas to you, too. MERRY CHRISTMAS! purrs

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  6. Another job well done, helping others! We'd say you earned yourself a permanent place on the Nice List.

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    1. A permanent spot on the Nist List? How great would THAT be. It would be wonderful. purrs

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    2. Merry Christmas to you all.
      Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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    3. And Merry Christmas to you, too. purrs

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  7. Replies
    1. Merry Christmas! Just a few hours to go. purrs

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  8. Now that story is sure to be a Christmas classic. You should put all of your adventures into a book :) Merry Christmas, friends!!!

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    1. Oohhh... What FUN that would be! purrs

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  9. A very Merry Christmas to you Nissy and all of your family. That was such a good Christmas story.Thanks for that. So happy Christmas eve and a very Merry Christmas tomorrow.

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    1. Same to you. May we all be surrounded by family, friends and lots & lots of love. purrs

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  10. We sure enjoyed that one pal! Merry Christmas Eve to all of you from all of us!

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    1. Merry Christmas Eve to you, too! And a very Merry Christmas, tomorrow. purrs

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  11. I think we're forever stuck on the naughty list, but at least we get to have more fun that way lol merry christmas

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    1. Hehehehee... It does appear to be the list of fun. purrs

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  12. Merry Christmas Eve, Nissy.
    I hope you and your family have a wonderful Holiday.
    xxoo

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    1. Awww... Thanks so much, my friend and I hope the very same, for you. purrs

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  13. Whew*wipes paw across forehead*. You certainly missed that lump of coal trying to attach itself to you and Sivvers. Sending you my best ever holiday cheer. Paw hugs, Savvy

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    1. Merry Christmas Savvy! And Merry Christmas to Sage and your peeps, too. How's your mum feelin'? Hope she's feelin' well enough to enjoy the day tomorrow and spend lots of time with you. purrs

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  14. Merry Catmus Eve
    Annabelle * Boo * Ping * Jinx

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you, too. purrs

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  15. Wooo Hoo Nissy a great adventure,Merry Christmas My friend,xx Speedy

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    1. Seems sometimes like adventure is my middle name. MOUSES! purrs

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    2. Hehehe mine to i think,xx SPeedy

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    3. Yup, I have to agree with that, for sure. purrs

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  16. Best Xmas tale!. This could be a children's book. Merry, meowy, snowy white Christmas to the whole gang.

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you and yours! Remember, teleportin' is not for kiddies. Especially when there are weasels involved. MOUSES! purrs

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  17. We loved reading your adventures ! Meowy Chrissymouse and Happy Holidays ! Purrs

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you, too! May you be surrounded by friends & family and lots & lots of love. purrs

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  18. That is a great story, Nissy. Merry Christmas eve to you!

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    1. Awww... Merry Christmas Simba. I'm pretty sure there might be some toys and stuff waitin' for you tomorrow mornin'. I saw the list! purrs

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  19. Merry Christmas to you on this blessed Christmas Eve. Your stories are fabulous.
    Purrs, Angie

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    1. Awww... Thanks so much for writin' that. purrs

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  20. Merry Christmas to you all Nissy. Fank you fur bein' ow furiends. Weez hope all yous dweams come twu.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Lexi

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    1. And yours, too. Merry Christmas my friends. Merry Christmas to all three of you. purrs

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  21. Merry Christmas to you. That was a great story.

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    1. Awww.. Thanks! Merry Christmas Flynn. May tomorrow be very special for you. purrs

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  22. MomFOD's t shirt says "i've been naughty, so what." I think that's my life motto. Merry Christmas!!! - Crepes.

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    1. Hmmm... Maybe I need a shirt! Why didn't I think of that? purrs

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  23. What a great Christmas story. We love the idea of a time vortex... but we don't want to visit one ourselves. Merry Christmas!

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    1. I'm kinda used to 'em. Livin' with Seville, one never knows when a time vortex might suddenly pop up. purrs

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  24. That was a great story! Boy Nissy, you sure had to go on a big adventure to get off that naughty list! Maybe next year you will be a little bit nicer! ;p

    Merry Christmas to all of you sweetie and to your pawrents too :)

    the critters in the cottage xo

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    1. It sure was a close call. I'm super relieved I was able to get myself off the list. The naughty list is NOT the list a nip-lovin' kitty wants to be on. purrs

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  25. Merry Chrustmas dearest Nissy, fursibs and mommy and daddy. xox

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you and yours, Katie. A very Merry Christmas, indeed. purrs

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  26. Replies
    1. Hehehehee... You been into the nip? I know I have! purrs

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  27. Pawsome!
    Merry Christmas!

    The Florida Furkids

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    1. MERRY CHRISTMAS! We're havin' a green one, this year, but it's okay 'cause... THERE'S NIP! purrs

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  28. Hope you all have a Joyous and Merry Christmas!

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    1. And you, too, my friend. Merry Christmas Cleopawtra! A very Merry Christmas to you and yours. purrs

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  29. Awesome story! Clooney Claus rewards the "naughty"! I'z here with your nip mice...Merry Catmas Nissy, Seville, Anderson, Rushton, Auntie Primrose & Mason...did I leave anykitty out? Happy Holidays to your Peeps!

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    1. Nip mice? NIP mice? The VERY best kind. purrs

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  30. Merry Christmas to you all! Have a wonderful time! :) xx Roxy & Tigerlino <3

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    1. Merry Christmas my friends! I'm purrin' that Santa was good to you and that you got some nip. purrs

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  31. Meowy Catmas to you and yours! Purrs from Deb and the Zee and Zoey Gang!

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you, too. To each and every one of you! purrs

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  32. Merry Christmas Nissy and family from all of us here at TEAM TNR and The ARC

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    1. Merry Christmas Sue! Merry Christmas to you and all the kitties. Each and every one of 'em. purrs

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  33. Oh Nissy what a fabulous story - as always......you always make me and Mom smile when we read them. I hope Santa Paws brought all of you just what you wanted!

    MEOWY CHRISTMAS
    Love, Sammy and Mom Pam

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    1. He brought me nip! HE BROUGHT ME NIP! And now I am... well... nipped. Oh how I love Christmas. purrs

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  34. Wishing you a wondrous and peaceful holiday!

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    1. Awww... Thanks so much. And I wish the very same, for you. Merry Christmas! purrs

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  35. • ★ Merry ★*♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•¸¸.•*
    ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•¸¸.•*★ Christmas¸¸.•*¨*•
    ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸.•★Kisses ★¨*•.¸¸¸.•★
    •*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•¸¸.•Nellie★•*¨*•

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    1. Merry Christmas Nellie! Santa bring you some nip? purrs

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  36. Wish you and your family a Merry Merry CATmas !

    XOXO

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas to you, too, my friend. purrs

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  37. Another classic tale for the holidays, Nissy! Merry Christmas to you and your peeps! We love and appreciate you!

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    1. Awww... Thanks so much. I really LOVE that word, "classic." purrs

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  38. Merry Christmas Nerissa!! And have a wonderful New Year, Too!
    Hugs,
    Samantha & Mom

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    1. And a very Merry Christmas and happy New Year to you, too! purrs

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    2. Another great story. Whew, I sure am happy you got off the naughty list and got back on the good list. I'd hate to see Santa give you a lump of coal!
      Hope you and your humans had a wonderful Christmas. By the way, Ann at Zoolatry did our pictures for Christmas. We aren't capable of doing anything half that nice., Love yours too.

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    3. Oh yeah... Can you imagine? Coal in my stockin'? MY stockin'? That would be a MOUSES! moment, for sure. purrs

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  39. Happy Holidays my kitty pal!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

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    1. And Happy Holidays to you, too! Hope your Christmas Day was wonderful. purrs

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  40. Great post :) Hope you had a great holiday!

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    1. I did! Christmas was absolutely wonderful. purrs

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  41. What a wonderful Christmas tale Nerissa! Hope you had a wonderful Christmas!
    Luvs
    Marty, Mom and the Gang

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    1. Awww... Thanks so much. I'm super glad that you enjoyed my adventure. Hope everhone did. purrs

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  42. Holey Moleys! You guys sure do have some wild adventures over there! Didja get all the coal dust out?

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    1. Yup. Light brushin' followed by spit and polish did the trick. purrs

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