Sunday 5 March 2023

tough luck, there, Peepers


Well that's tough luck, there, Peepers.


MOUSES!


Well don't look at me, ol' peep of mine.  It's not like I didn't warn you.  I've been warnin' you ever since that brother of mine came to live inside.


MOUSES!


'Cause you've been encouragin' him to sit on the chesterfield with you, all this time.  When he resisted, you SHOULD have left it at that.  But did you?  Oh NO...  No, you didn't take my advice when I told you not to encourage him to go up there and now...  Well now you have to live with the consequences of your actions, don't you.


Not a question.  Statement of fact.


MOUSES!


Well it's not my fault he has now taken up not just sittin' next to you, but rather, right in your spot.  It's not my fault when he stretches out like that, there's no room left for you.  I could have told you this would play out just as it has.


As a matter of fact, I think I did.


MOUSES!


But anyway, if there isn't enough room left on that there chesterfield for you, Peepers, why don't you just sit on the floor?


Hey, if we cats can sit on the floor, so can a peepIn fact...


In fact, as we cats are the superior species, perhaps peeps should ALWAYS sit on the floor.  Ever think about THAT?


MOUSES!


What's that?  What's that, Peepers?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?


No seriously, what are you babblin' about?  You're sputterin' or somethin'.  There's nothin' but incoherent gobbely gook comin' out of your mouth.


And when I say gobbledygook I definitely mean gook.  Or guck, that is.  Is that foam or is it drool formin' at the sides of your mouth?


Yuk.


MOUSES!


Peepers!  PEEPERS!  You need me to give you a good smacky-paw to the side of the head, or somethin' like that?  'Cause seriously, I'm willin' to give it a go.


It's not like I haven't done it before.


MOUSES!


Okay, slow down there, ol' peep of mine.  SLOW............ DOWN.  Slow down!  Take it one word at a time.  And um...


Well uh...


Well take this tissue and wipe that gook and/or guck away from your mouth, would ya?


It's grossin' me out like you wouldn't believe.


MOUSES!


Okay, I'm listenin'.  I'm listenin' to what you have to say, and what I'm hearin' is that you're afraid that if you were to sit on the floor, allowin' Saffron - and me, of course - your spot on the couch, you might not be able to get back up from said floor.


Hmmm....


Well that's 'cause you're old, there, ol' peep of mine.  I don't call you ol' peep for nothin', you know.


MOUSES!



*******************************


And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.



9 comments:

  1. WOW! Shock! Cat on the couch!!!!!
    Guess the peepers never heard the saying..."If you want to find the warmest(coziest) place in the house...get a cat!" MOL!!!
    We do our job well. Peepers, if ya snooze ya lose ;) MOL!
    Purrs, Julie

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  2. Show some respect to the elderly. :) Just kidding.

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  3. Us kitties always try to save some room for the peeps.

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  4. Maybe you can ALL have your own chesterfields, Sivvers! It will be like musical chairs!

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  5. Seville, it's too bad she didn't listen to you way back when!

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  6. Oh my!! We wold love to get on our peeps' couch, but we are not allowed in that room....

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  7. Sofa extensions is what you need. Every cat needs them, as well as extensions to the middle of the bed! And if they dont make them, well, they should! Plus peep hoists to raise the peeps up. Just like the nights of old used to mount their steeds. Not sure if they used them for their sofas also. Im betting they didnt as that armour would play havoc with the leatherette 🙂
    Toodle pips and purrs
    ERin

    ReplyDelete

I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.