It's up! IT'S UP!
Hoo-hoo... THE CHRISTMAS TREE IS UP.
But boy-oh-boy, was gettin' it decorated EVER an adventure.
You all know 'bout naughty words and stuff, right? Well let me tell you, I HEARD QUITE A FEW of 'em last night.
Now, where should I begin?
At the beginnin', I suppose. That would make sense. I shall begin with the puttin' up of the lights.
Picture it: My house, three strings of lights, and a... Uh... Um... A peep.
You know, I think I'm gonna ask Santa to bring us a pre-lit Christmas tree next year, 'cause Peep #1 is ABSOLUTELY NO GOOD at puttin' on those lights.
On the other paw, I did have a lot of fun watchin' her try.
On the OTHER paw, it was pretty obvious she wasn't havin' any fun at all.
BUT ON THE OTHER PAW - which I can say on account of my bein' a cat, and cats havin' four paws - I don't really care. 'Bout the peep not havin' fun, I mean. My enjoyment of watchin' her strugglin' with the lights is far more important than her frustrations of dealin' with them, for sure.
Plus, I learned a few new swear words in the process, and this cat likes to take advantage of all educational opportunities, for sure.
AND DID YOU KNOW, once all the lights are up on the tree, if they're not DISTRIBUTED EVENLY, one has to take 'em all down and start all over again?
Well once the lights were all up - THE SECOND TIME - the REAL fun began.
Now to be perfectly honest, I will admit that at this point, the naughty words were no longer bein' said. Also, the peep's face was no longer red. But... But there was still a show to be seen, for sure.
Peep #1 thinks she can dance.
FYI, she can't.
But that didn't stop her from dancin' and prancin' around the rockin' ol' Christmas tree.
You should have seen her. She was boppin' this way and that to the Christmas music, while hangin' the ornamental breakables all over the...
Wait a minute. Did I say the naughty words had ceased? I think I did, but I shouldn't have, because...
Because this was about the time when the peep came face to face with the GIGANTIC metal mess.
Picture it: My house, an enormous mass of metal ornament hanger thingies lookin' like a big ol' mess of tangled up tumbleweed, and a peep.
AND DID YOU KNOW, if you untangle those ornament hook thingies, and then pile 'em up together after they've been untangled, they come to life and get all tangled up together again?
Oh, and did you ALSO know, sometimes they get lost in the tree?
Yeah, that happened quite a few times. EVERY SINGLE TIME a glass ball fell from the peep's grasp, even though the ball was caught and retrieved, the metal hanger was nowhere to be seen. I have no idea where they went, although I'm thinkin' it might be the same place odd socks disappear to from the dryer.
And judgin' by the peep's cries of anguish every time one of those metal thingies was lost, it must be easier to knit an entire sock than to untangle just one of those hooks.
So picture it: My house, a peep dancin' around the livin' room while more-than-occasionally yellin' out swear words, and me.
But the good news is...
Well the peep would say the good news is that I didn't get last night's escapades on film. And you know, she's probably right about that, 'cause boy-oh-boy would it ever be embarrassing...
But MY good news is that we now have a fully decorated Christmas tree all ready for Santa.
And ready for me to knock down... I mean, play... I MEAN, REDISTRIBUTE the ornamental breakables. Breakable ornamentals... You know, the glass balls and things.
So there are likely to be more naughty words bein' said, very soon.