Wednesday 1 August 2018

ribbit

If I've said it once, I've said it a million and thirty-seven times:  I, Seville the Cat, live in a zoo.

MOUSES!

Seriously, I do.

MOUSES!


You all heard 'bout the mouse in the house...  I mean, garage, right?

Yeah, well he's gone.

Yup, it's true.  That ol' mouse heard 'bout how us cats were lookin' for volunteers to evict him, and he packed his bags, all on his OWN accord, and up and left the very next day.

Well...

Well at least that's our story, and we're stickin' to it.

MOUSES!

But now...

Now there's ANOTHER interloper livin' in that ol' garage.

Can you believe it?

MOUSES!

So a couple days ago, the peep was settin' down' a tray of plants in there - in that ol' garage, I mean - and the next thing she knew, somethin' jumped up in the air, almost hittin' her right in her face.

Right in her face.

Right IN her face.

Can you believe it?

MOUSES!

And the peep, bein' a peep, FROZE.  Just like a statue.

You ever notice that, my friends?  You ever notice that when peeps get scared or startled or the like, they freeze solid.  Solid, just like statues.

Stupid, really, when you think about it.  I mean, if there's somethin' out there that's scary - somethin' that might harm you in some way - your first instinct should be to get the mouses out of there, pronto.  Get the mouses out of the danger area, for sure.  Get the mouses away from whatever it is that's scarin' you.  You know?  Well that's what I'd do.

But peeps?  HA!  Peeps don't have HALF the common sense we cats have, so...

So instead of doin' the reasonable thing, they freeze.  Yup, just like statues.

MOUSES!

At least that's what the smart peeps do.

And when I say smart, I mean smarter than the other peeps.  I do NOT mean smarter than us cats.

MOUSES!

But back to the not-so-smart peeps.  THOSE peeps don't freeze like statues.  OH NO...  Those peeps go stickin' their noses right in whatever it is, that's dangerous.  HOW MANY LIVES would have been saved if only the peeps in those slasher movies did not go into the room from which the strange noises were emanatin', moments before?  Hm?  HM?  Answer me that, why don't you.  MOUSES!

When danger is lurkin', we cats don't freeze like statues, nor do we INVESTIGATE suspicious slasher killer sounds.  No, we cats are way smarter than that.  We cats high-tail it out of the dangerous situation like no one has ever high-tailed it before.

Or we hide under a bed.

Whichever one works best at the time.

You know.

MOUSES!

But anyway...

But anyway, Peep #1 is not as smart as a cat, but apparently is smarter than some other peeps, so...

So she froze solid like a statue.

And after thawin' a bit, she looked around for whatever alien entity had jumped up, nearly hittin' her right in the face.

Turns out, the alien entity wasn't an alien at all.  Nope, not even close.  Turns out, the alien entity was...

A frog.

Can you believe it?

MOUSES!

So now...

So now it looks like we have a frog livin' in our garage.  Hoppin' about and ribbitin' like he owns the joint.

MOUSES!

I'm not sure for how long he'll be in there - the frog, I mean - on account of my unwillingness to organise the troops...  I mean, my fursibs, for his removal.

Plus, I'm pretty sure little froggy frew got in the garage in the first place, due to somethin' THE PEEP did, so...

So if she wants rid, she's gonna have to do it herself.

Just like with the mouse.

MOUSES!

12 comments:

  1. A frog smacks her in the face, and she freezes?!? Sorry, but I'd be doing my best Usain Bolt impression, Seville!

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  2. MOUSES! She froze after the frog hit her in the face? Humans ... sheesh ... we will never quite figure them out!

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  3. MOUSES! She froze after the frog hit her in the face? Humans ... sheesh ... we will never quite figure them out!

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  4. I think you should keep him and call him Kermit!

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  5. I wish we had a frog in our garage! That would be fun. It's too dry here, though.

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  6. Dude, Seville, that critter may look like a frog but I bet it's an alien! If you see any sign of slime, get that critter Frog Marched out of there, pronto, else before you know it there'll be lots of baby aliens popping out of peep #1's tummy and you'll be..... OK so maybe I ate that strong cheese too late last night, but you know you can never be too careful!.....
    Purrs
    ERin the Cat (AKA Ripley-mouse hunter) Princess

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  7. dood....de food servizz gurl wooda done de same thing....freezed ta de exact spot til what ever it waz made it self known coz ya never noe when a.... vizshuz sum thin.... mite just pop out N yell ... TA DA ~~~~~~~~~~ !!! ☺♥

    N that kinda sir prize iz well.....ewe noe ~~ ;) ♥♥

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  8. A FROG in the garage. Where is your Get Ip and Go Seville. They don't bite (do they????)

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  9. Severs, you can send him over to my house, 'cause Mom and I really like forggies. They like to hang out on the pad in the hot tub to get daily spa treatments. Then in the evenings they frolic in the garden. Sometimes Mom will bring one inside just to let me have a peek before she takes it back outside. I'm only interested when they hop. Tee hee hee. Winks.

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  10. Well, Seville a frog is much better than a mouse. They do less damage so Peep #1 will have less to complain about how you cats aren't doing your job. I know it is her fault that they are in the garage but that doesn't stop us peeps from blaming the cats for not getting rid of them.

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  11. Now I know I was surprised you didn't all go out and catch the mouse, but I would advise against the frog. Eric and Flynn caught one when they were young and only licked it to see what it tasted like. It must have tasted bad because they both started frothing at the mouth and kept well away for ever after.

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  12. I guess a frog is not so bad, it could be worse- like a skunk :)

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