Don't look at me, Peepers.
No seriously, don't look at me. I haven't yet finished my mornin' ablutions.
Go ask Andy for help, why don't ya. He doesn't care 'bout doin' mornin' ablutions. Have you SEEN the state of his tail?
Earlier this mornin'...
Hey Peepers, whatcha doin'? Somethin' stupid as usual?
I only ask 'cause uh...
'CAUSE WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S LOOKIN' PRETTY WEIRD.
You're hearin' a noise, you say. A strange noise. An annoyingly strange noise.
Hmmm... You don't say.
Oh yeah, you DID say.
No. No, I don't know what the noise is.
Oh yeah, I can hear it. I just don't know what it is and quite frankly, I don't care, either.
You think I should help you check it out. You think I should help. HELP. What do I look like, YOUR SLAVE?
You're thinkin' a mouse or somethin' might be behind the wall. Or in the shoe cupboard down below?
Hmmm... A mouse, huh? Ask Andy. He goes in that cupboard all the time. Goodness knows what he does in there. It's not like he fits into any of your shoes.
You'd like ME to go into the cupboard and see if there's a mouse settin' up house in there. Again, I repeat: What do I look like, YOUR SLAVE?
What? How come you're lookin' at me like that?
What do you MEAN I could be more cooperative? I suggested you go ask Andy, didn't I? How much more cooperative do you expect me to be?
But seriously, Peepers, what do you mean?
Excuse me while I go into the kitchen.
Okay, I'm back.
Why did I leave the room to laugh? Well, 'cause last time I laughed at you, I did it right in your face, and you complained it was rude
Okay, so let's get this straight. You're hearin' a noise and you're thinkin' it might be a mouse, and YOU'D LIKE ME to help you.
Excuse me, I have to go laugh again.
I'm back. Good to go now.
No, I don't mean I'm good to go into the cupboard. I'm mean, I'm done laughin' at you. You wanna check out the cupboard, you're gonna have to check it out yourself. If you get down on your hands and knees, I bet your head will fit in there, and...
Oh gosh, sorry 'bout this, Peepers. I really thought I was done before, but...
Okay, I'm back. And this time, I really am back for good.
What's so funny, you ask?
Well the thought of my helpin' you by goin' into that cupboard where Andy hangs out was pretty funny, for starters.
Then there's the image of you stickin' your head in that cupboard where Andy hangs out. Well that's pretty funny, too.
And then there's the fact that the noise you're hearin' isn't even comin' from the cupboard in the first place.
No seriously, it's not.
Yes, yes, I KNOW you've been lookin' about in the sunroom, tryin' to track down the noise for the past forty-five minutes.
Yes, yes, I KNOW a whole forty-five minutes of lookin' for a noise is a very long time, but..
BUT LOOK UP, PEEPERS. LOOK WAY, WAY UP.
Yeah, that's the ticket.
And speakin' of tickets, I bet I could have sold tickets to this little mornin' escapade of the peep's and made enough money for a whole week's worth of nip. MOUSES!
Okay Peepers, see that dragonfly caught between the blind and the skylight? THAT'S who has been makin' the funny noises.
Don't get all huffy with me. Not MY fault you wasted the last forty-five minutes lookin' for a mouse.
AND BY THE WAY, THE STEP LADDER IS IN THE KITCHEN. TRY NOT TO FALL FROM IT WHILE RESCUING THE DRAGONFLY!
'Cause we all know you're gonna try.