Aloha, my friends. ALOHA!
Seville the Cat here, reportin' from Hawaii.
Not even close, my friends. NOT EVEN CLOSE! Not only am I not in Hawaii, I'm not even anywhere warm, at all. Not anywhere even close to warm, my friends. Not even close!
Last night, you see, we had...
Oohhh.. This mornin' offered up a chilly reception, to be sure. Why, I could practically see my breath in the air.
And when I say practically see my breath, what I REALLY MEAN is that had I gone out first thing in the mornin', I'm pretty sure I would have seen my breath, for sure. However, I, bein' the ever-so-sensible cat that I am, stayed inside 'til it got a bit warmer.
The peep's plants, however, were not so lucky. They had been out all night, and...
Well frosted they got, for sure.
The tomatoes? They're dead. Not that they were doin' all that well while alive, but at least they were still breathin'.
The basil and rosemary plants, she brought inside. Good thing, too, on account of the state of those tomatoes who had been left outdoors. Did I mention they were dead?
And the lettuce is...
Well actually, the lettuce is still growin' very nicely.
'Cept for the ones someone sat upon and squished, the other day.
And if you happen to hear any reports of lettuce plants havin' been sat upon and squished by an incredibly handsome marmalade cat....
IGNORE 'EM, for those reports are the very epitome of fake news, for sure.
Maybe in a I-had-my-paws-crossed-behind-my-back-when-I-told-the-peep-it-wasn't-me kinda way.
And in related news...
You have any idea how difficult it is for a cat to cross his paws BEHIND his back? We cats are simply not built that way.
And as for the nip...
Well let's just say, I'm pretty sure the peep WOULD LIKE to claim that the one little survivin' nip plant we had, was killed by last night's frost, but truth be told, it was lookin' as bad yesterday, BEFORE the cold arrived, as it does today. Truth is, it was a sorry excuse for a nip plant before, and is equally as sad, today.
What? What's that, Peepers? What are you babblin' on about now?
I did too.
Yes, Peepers, I did. I did tell my readers we had a killin' frost last night.
No, Peepers, I did not. I did not tell my readers that it was the frost that killed the nip plant, for that, ol' Peepers of mine, would have been a lie, and...
What do you mean I should have helped you grow the plant? Growin' nip is YOUR job. Imbibing in the nip is mine. And...
And actually, I did help. There was that day, remember? That day when I felt so sorry for the little tyke of a plant, I tried to give it mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. You know, to bring it back to life.
Okay, so it might have been more like an into-my-mouth-the-nip-went kinda resuscitation, but still...
But still, I only ate two leaves.
I left the other three.
And in related news...
It has been ruled MERELY COINCIDENTAL that the squished lettuce plants that were supposedly sat upon by an incredibly handsome marmalade cat, happened to be growin' right next to the pot containing the nip plant requiring mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. You know, the nip plant with only five - I mean, THREE - leaves.