Sunday 24 September 2017

rocket man

Hey everybody!  You all know 'bout my brother, Andy, right?

And you all know 'bout his lactose intolerance, too.

Well let me just say...

Let me just say, Rocket Man was never in it.


So the other night, I was hangin' out with the peeps in the family room, tryin' to figure out a way to get Andy to leave the room, without the peeps actually KNOWIN' I was behind his leavin' the room, 'cause APPARENTLY, my doin' things to get Andy to leave rooms is frowned upon by those peeps of mine, when...

When all of a sudden, I started regrettin' I was anywhere behind that long-haired marmie freak brother of mine's behind, at all.


Like I said, Rocket Man was never in it.

MOUSES ANDY!  What the heck did you get into?

Truth be told, we may never know.

Actually, that's not quite true.  Nope, that's not true at all.  Andy knows.  Yeah, Andy knows what he got into, for sure.  But he's not sayin'.  He has taken the fifth, or whatever it is, and...

And the Peep?  Does the peep not know, you ask?

Well...  Well Peep #1 suspects she knows.

And of course, I, bein' nosey, and...

I mean, I, bein' the naturally-ever-so-curious-and-inquisitive - not to mention dashing - sort of fellow I am...

Well truth be told, I think I know, too.  Yeah, I'm pretty sure Peep #2 had some ice cream and then carelessly left the bowl on the kitchen table.

And the rest is history, my friends.  The rest is history, for sure.

But if only the smell were history, too.


Next time Andy, eat a plate of beans with your ice cream, why don't ya.

You know...

You know, I bet if Andy ate enough ice cream and beans, he could supply the world with some sort of alternative - and renewable - fuel.


And oh my gosh, we could offer charter trips to the moon and back!  Yup, our motto could be, To the moon and back on a single fart.


Maybe two.

Two toots to the moon! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Actually, Andy's lactose intolerance is really not a laughin' matter.

It's nothin' to sneeze at, either.

ACTUALLY, I bet a sneeze comin' from the opposite direction would act like a braking mechanism of sorts.


Hey Peepers!  Do we have any extra peepers?  I mean, peppers?  I mean, pepper?

What?  Why do I want to know 'bout the pepper you have on paw?

Uh...  Nothin'.  Nothin' at all.  Um...  Never mind.

Rats.  Caught in the act by the peep.

Well technically, the peep didn't really catch me doin' anythin'.  She just knows somethin' is up.  She just suspects I am up to some kinda mischief.  She just...

You are so right.  Peep #1 IS pretty suspicious by nature.

I have absolutely no idea why.


But back my plan.  All I need do is get my paws on a good supply of ice cream and peepers.  I mean pepper!  Yeah, all I need do is get my paws on a good supply of ice cream and pepper, and I should be all set.  With Andy's intolerance of the lactose, we'll be rakin' in the moolah, offerin' trips to the moon, and...

Why to the moon, you ask?  Why did I choose the moon?

Well...  Well where else would a lactose-fuelled rocket go?

Plus, everyone KNOWS the moon is made of cheese, and cheese contains lactose, and you know what that means.




  1. Oh my, down wind sure isn't the best seat in the house!

  2. I kind of like the idea of Andy supplying an alternative fuel source. Well, if there was some way to contain the smell!

  3. Bwhahahahahahahahah I love the moon trip. Nearly spilled by mug of coffee MOL!!!

  4. Hey, do you think Andy will be available for deep space exploration? Just asking as there has to be a planet made of nip somewheres out there, and one of cream too!
    Toode pip and purrs

  5. I bet Andy's belly was pretty angry at him for licking up that cream! I think I can hear it even here in O-R-E-gon! Tee hee hee. I think you'll make a kitty fortune, Seville, with your moon plan! I think you can get Andy on board with the plan, but not sure about his belly! Tee hee hee!

  6. Brilliant never laughed so much all the best for your brilliant idea....Andy's super high power fuelled rocket to the moon.xπŸ˜ΈπŸ˜ΈπŸ˜»πŸΎπŸΎπŸΎπŸΎπŸ’•πŸŒ›πŸŒŒ

  7. * helpless laughter *

    Oh poor Andy and his tummy. Will they be your fortune???

  8. **Two toots to the moon! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!** Seville that was FUNNY!!! But seriously dude, mew could use him as an alternative power source and cut down on all your household bills, be wurth thinking about, just feed him extra iScream and off mew go! MOL

    Big hugs

    Basil & Co xox


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