Deck the halls with boughs of catnip. Fa la la la la... la la la la. 'Tis the season to be... nipped. Fa la la la la... la la...
Nah! That doesn't work. That doesn't work at all. Firstly, it's ALWAYS the season to be nipped. Everyone who is anyone knows that. And secondly, and perhaps more importantly, nipped and catnip don't rhyme. At least not with each other. MOUSES!
Oh hello there my friends. I was just singin' some Christmas songs.
And by the way, when I say singin', I mean singin', as opposed to caterwaulin', which is what Peep #1 is inclined to do.
And speakin' of caterwaulin'... You ever hear my first peep caterwaul? Take my advice. DON'T!!! It's a window shatterin', ear piercing experience, for sure.
And when I say window shatterin', I mean WINDOW SHATTERIN' as in, Peep #1 is no longer allowed to caterwaul anywhere near high-priced windows and the like. No more singin' in churches with those pretty stained glass windows. You have any idea how much those cost to replace? MOUSES!
And when I say ear piercin', I mean EAR PIERCIN' as in, you've gotta cover your ears or stuff 'em with cotton or somethin', and not the kind of piercings peeps get in order to wear earrings. MOUSES!
Now where was I?
Oh yeah. I need a word that rhymes with catnip. Hmmm...
Anybody out there have any ideas? I know there are lots of rhymin' words. Lots of words that rhyme with nip. But I've gotta be able to work 'em into my song.
Lip? As in fat lip? Hmmm... Not very Christmassy, I should think. Unless, of course, you're talkin' about peeps pushin' other peeps around while they're doin' their last minute Christmas shoppin'. Or rival Santa impostors, vyin' for the same street corner. Or when Uncle Jim Bob, whom you only ever see but once a year, has too much holiday punch before Christmas dinner, and decides the lampshade suits him better than the lamp, and then starts explainin' that when he's wearin' the lampshade, and can't see anybody, everybody at the table looks better. Or...
No... I really don't think I should use fat lip in my song.
Tip you say. Well yeah, I have to admit, that one is Christmassy. There have been many Christmases when I've imbibed in so many nip mice that you could TIP me over with a claw. True story!
On the other paw, I'm not sure I wanna admit 'bout that tippin' business after all. MOUSES!
Hip. Hip... Hip? Nah, I've got nothin' for that.
Sip huh? Well I do enjoy a good ol' sip of the nip wine. But can I work it into the song? I'm not sure. How 'bout...
Wait a minute! Wait a cotton nip pickin' minute.
And when I say cotton, I don't mean the kind of cotton you might stuff in your ears to avoid hearin' Peep #1 caterwaul. Or actually, maybe I do.
But back to my song. DIP. Dip could work. I KNOW I can work dip into my song.
And speakin' of dip, I sure could go for some sour cream, cheese and nip dip right about now. Mmmm... Mmmm... Little sour cream. Some grated cheddar cheese. Mix in a cup or two of freshly chopped nip. Maybe three. Maybe three cups of the nip. Scrumptiously delicious, for sure.
But like I said, BACK TO MY SONG!
How does this sound?
Deck the halls with boughs of catnip. Fa la la la la... la la la la. Scoop a paw full of the nip dip. Fa la la la la... la la la la.
Don't be stingy with the nip tea. Fa la la la... la la la... la... la... la. Lots of fresh catnip is the key. FA LA LA LA LA... LA... LA... LA... LA.
OH MY MOUSES!!! I'M A GENIUS. JUST CALL ME MAESTRO SEVILLE.