Wednesday, 5 October 2016

never mind


Hey Peepers!  You have any green yarn handy? Light green?  A sage colour or somethin'?

What's that, Peepers? You wanna know why I'm lookin' for yarn?

Ummm...  Never mind.

No, I MEANT to say, WHAT'S THAT, PEEPERS?  I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Whew!  That was a close call, for sure.

Oh hello there, Peepers.  What am I doin' diggin' around in your bag of knittin' stuff, you ask?  Um... Uh....  Er...  Nothin'...

Mouses woman, can't a kitty do nothin' and not get asked more questions than they asked durin' the Spanish Inquisition?

By the way, how many questions did they ask durin' the Spanish Inquisition?  You happen to know that, Peepers?  'Cause if you don't know, maybe you should take a moment to go look it up.  In fact, you could go look that up right now.

And you could let me get back to doin' nothin'.  MOUSES!

Now where was I...

What's that, Peepers?  Do I happen to know where your yellow yarn is?  The yarn you used to make that teddy bear?  Hmmm...  Nope.  I don't believe I do.

At least I don't know where it is now.  Last time I had it, it was over there by that chair.  But I have no idea where it got to after that.

I mean, no.  NO.  No, I do not know where your ball of yellow yarn is.

Why do you ask?

Actually Peepers, you should ask Andy.  He looks like a yarn thief, for sure.  MOUSES!

For mousin' out loud, Peepers!  Stop walkin' into the family room and surprisin' me like that!

I TOLD you, I'm not doin' anythin' by diggin' through this bag of toys...  I mean, this bag containing your knitting things and stuff and...

I'm not doin' nothin' at all!  I mean, I'm doin' nothin'.  I mean, I'm not doin' anythin'.  I mean...

Now see what you've done?  You've got me all confused.  I'm even usin' double negatives which YOU KNOW I never do and...

Andy!  Not right now.  Not in front of the peep!  

Ummm...  I have no idea why Andy just ran into the family room with a ball of sage green yarn in his mouth and dropped it by my paws before exclaimin', "I found the green yarn!"  I have no idea why he did that at all.  I uh...  Um...  Er...

Andy, SHHH....  Stop explainin' stuff to the peep. And for mousin' out loud, stop USIN' MY NAME while you're doin' your explainin'!

Andy, why don't you go look for stuff somewhere else.  In another room.  You can come back once I've gotten rid of the peep.

Pardon me, Peepers?  Yes Peepers.  Yes Peepers, I know.  I know I'm not allowed to play with balls of yarn and stuff.  I know I'm not allowed to play with yarn at all.

Yes I know, Peepers.  I know how you keep your knittin' stuff out of our reach on purpose.  I know you never leave it unattended.

I told you, Peepers, I know!  I KNOW THAT PLAYIN' WITH YARN IS SUPER DANGEROUS FOR KITTIES on account of if we swallow it, it can get us all plugged up in ways I don't want to even think about bein' plugged, and make us kitties require surgery and stuff but...

BUT ALL I WAS DOIN' WAS LOOKIN' FOR A BALL OF YARN!  I WASN'T GONNA ACTUALLY PLAY WITH IT!

I mean, all I was doin' was diggin' through this bag of toys...

I mean, all I was doin' was lookin' through your knittin' bag...

I mean, I WASN'T DOIN' NOTHIN' AT ALL!

Awww...  MOUSES!

Hmmm....

By the way, Peepers.  You ever find out how many questions were asked durin' that ol' Spanish Inquisition?  'Cause if you still don't know, you really should look that up.  Like, go look it up right now.  I'll even let you borrow my computer to do so, if you want.  My computer that's in my office. In my office which is over there.  Not here.  Not this room.  Not this room with your bag of knittin' and stuff and...

I told you before.  I was NOT gonna play with your yarn.  I wasn't.  REALLY!

Besides, balls of yarn don't even roll properly.  They're not round, you see.  Proper balls are supposed to be round and they're supposed to roll and...

What's that, Peepers?  How do I know 'bout balls of yarn not bein' round and not rollin' properly?

Well...  Well...

Well because I'm a super smart kitty and I KNOW 'bout geometry and shapes and stuff like that.  I know all about it!  I just know.   I know even without having any first paw experience with the actual rollin' of those balls of yarn, or anythin' like that.

ANDY, I told you!  Wait until AFTER the peep has left the room before you bring that...

What's that, Peepers?  What is Andy wantin' to bring into the family room now?  Uh...  Um...  Er...  Never mind.

MOUSES!

16 comments:

  1. I never understood the fuss over nomming yarn by some cats and even dogs. It doesn't smell like toona or chiken. It isn't melty in our moufs. It gets caught between our toofs and clear...CLEARLY...gets wound around our tonsils. Still... I'm sure most four-leggeds aren't interested in eating yarn. Hoomons really need to chill out. And that's all I'm gonna say about that.

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  2. You sure spin a good yarn Seville!

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  3. We hate it when the humans catch us in the act of doing something of which they don't approve. Sounds as if you need to have a meeting with your fursibs, Seville, and let them know they should be more discreet. We sure wish we knew what your plans are for that sage-colored yarn. XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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  4. I get the feeling you were less convincing than usual, Seville.

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  5. Hehehe. I have the same problem with mice, and them unraveling too, a leg here a tail there. purrs ps did you find the yellow yarn?... I think I may have seen it under one of my sofa's. ERin

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  6. MOL..completely innocent, huh...MOL :D Pawkisses for a Happy Play...Day :) <3

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  7. I should stop while you are ahead if I were you Seville. You're digging yourself deeper and deeper. By the way, why do you want the green yarn?

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  8. Poor Seville. Trying to manage all sides at once AND stay out of trouble :)

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  9. Nice post. I really enjoyed reading it!!! Have a great busy day!!!!
    Dana

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  10. dood...we think noe matter how ya look at thiz....green side...yellow side....rolly side....yarn side....doez knot roll two well kinda side....ewe N andy iz still ...in trubull!! ♥♥♥☺☺☺ { did ya find any nip in de knittin bag bye any chance ~~~~ } !!!

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  11. I still want to know what you want the yarn for if not to play with it. I have lots of green yarn you can have :) My hubby and I are Polish so when he questions me I call it the Polish Inquisition.:)

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  12. Have a wonderful weekend!

    Noodle and crew

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  13. We're not sure if you really convinced them, Seville... Purrs

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  14. What a woolly state of affairs Seville, we enjoy a good yarn at the best of times and speaking of such-like, have mew tried cotton bobbins, embroidery thread and ribbon, they all make fur a really fab time - although the P.A. disagrees with that most vehemently - can't think why! MOL

    Purrs

    Basil & Co xox

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  15. Oh, Seville, string in the paws of felines does tend to freak out the 'rents.

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  16. Sigh, that would be TKS. I, Savannah the Cat, never ever never dig in any bag or box or nothing. But TKS, she is inside a bag before the humans can sit it down. They have to be extra special careful to not let her get paws on ribbon, cellophane and what not

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.