Yesterday, ol' peepers looked at me and asked, "And are you going to drink that milk, Nissy?" I must admit, I was a little confused about the question. Firstly, there was no saucer of milk waiting for me to drink it and secondly, the peep knows I prefer cream over milk. I mean... just what was she gettin' at? MOUSES!
Apparently, I've been milkin' stuff for all its worth. At least, that's what peep #1 says. Personally, I don't see how that's possible. I don't have any cows to milk. No goats, either. Really, I don't think I'm milking, anything.
I think my problems came to a head with my desire to use up a whole half of the family room couch, yesterday. I just didn't feel like sharing. I didn't feel like sharing with my sister Constance and I certainly didn't feel like sharing with any ol' peeps. What I felt like doing was stretching out from the tip of my tail to the tips of my paws and when I do a stretch like that, I take up a lot of room. I'm a pretty long cat, you see, so I need my space.
Besides, the other half of the couch was still available. A peep could have moved my Auntie Blossom and sat down, there. Plus, there was always the floor...
When I didn't want peep #1 to pick me up and move me over to the side a bit, I gave her that look I've been workin' on for the past few weeks. That oh-woe-is-me-pity-the-kitty-with-the-sore-knee look. It's a pretty good look. Quite effective.
At least it was quite effective up until sometime yesterday. Apparently, the peep has come up with some countermeasures and those countermeasures for my oh-woe-is-me-pity-the-kitty-with-the-sore-knee look are a "you gonna drink that milk" coupled with a narrowing of the eyes and a pursing of the lips. Those countermeasures are somewhat effective, themselves. MOUSES!
So I nicely reminded the peep about my leg. You know the one. The one from which my doctor shaved off all the fur! I stretched it out so that she could get a better look. Usually, that tactic works like a charm but this time, no luck. She wasn't fallin' for it.
That was about the time when ol' peepers reminded me what had happened the day before yesterday. I was over by the big ol' oak tree, standing guard. There's a gigantic grey squirrel who hangs out over there and I wanted to tell him he should hang out, elsewhere. Also, nosey neighbour cat walks past that tree when he comes over - uninvited - and I wanted to remind him that he was... well... uninvited, if you know that I mean.
While I was standing guard, the peep was busy watering the roses in the pots. One moment I was at the tree and the next, I was over by the garage chasing Mr. Chipmunk with my brother Rushton. We were trying to corner him over by the corner of the garage when ol' peepers came over and ruined the sporting event by helpin' Mr. Chipmunk get away.
"You were over by that tree," the peep said, pointing to the oak. "How did you get here so quickly?" she asked. I turned tail and walked away. I should have hobbled. I really should have put on a bit more of a limp. My walkin' away gracefully after participating in a squirrel chasin' event likely signified to the peep that my knee was pretty much better. MOUSES!
And I may have possibly added to the ol' milkin' theory later on, when I jumped up onto the chair in my office. That's the chair that sits next to my desk which holds my computer in my office. It's my chair. I need it to write my blog.
Well, at the time, ol' peepers happened to be sittin' on my chair but she wasn't using up the whole thing. She was sort of perched on the edge and there was plenty of room for me to get in between her and the back of it. Plenty of room for me to squeeze my way in there and then, gradually, push her off.
I mean... I needed to work on my blog and so I needed access to my computer. Ol' peepers was only borrowing it for somethin' silly like workin' on her silly book. My blog is far more important than her book. People read my blog.
To make my point, I pointed over to my 2013 Best Blog Writing Nose-to-Nose Award. I wanted to remind the peep just who was the writer in this family. Apparently, my little reminder was unappreciated. Apparently, I've been milkin' that trophy of mine for all it's worth, too. Well, that's accordin' to the peep. Personally, I think she's just jealous. She has never received a trophy for any of her writing. I think that says it all.
Then, the peep had the audacity to remind me that I have still not officially accepted the last few awards given to me by my pals in the blogosphere. I had to admit, she had me there. I have been slackin' in that area but still, she didn't have to remind me.
So I made ol' peepers a little promise. Within the next two weeks or so, I promise to officially accept the awards I have received from my pals and to pass them along. Plus, I'm gonna introduce a brand spankin' new award to celebrate my reaching fifty-thousand hits on my blog. So stay tuned 'cause there's big news on its way, for sure.
And I'm gonna ask the peep to make sure there are saucers of milk and cream for everyone. Milk... cream... whichever they prefer. Don't worry. You won't have to milk the cow, yourselves. I promise you that.
Our cats don't get milk or cream. Our people are mean like that.
ReplyDeleteGlad you are feeling better.
Lee and Phod
Dang squirrels are always causing problems Nessy. I know you will figure out how to milk the situation for a while longer!
ReplyDeleteSo you won't be able to milk it so much for half the couch, but we are very glad your knee is doing so well. And we look forward to seeing about your new award.
ReplyDeleteWe say, "milk it for all it's worth", Nissy! MOL! Why bother havin a bum knee if you can't use it for special treatment? Of course as a kitteh you should always have special treatment. HahahaMeow!
ReplyDeleteI am glad your knee is better Nissy. That was sneaky of the peeps to catch you running around though. I can't think what she means about you doing the milking though.
ReplyDeleteWe don't get milk or cream because our Mum doesn't like them!! What about us cos we don't know if we like them or not as we've never had any!
ReplyDeleteLuv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
Oh thank COD, we don't have to milk the cow or the goat to get a sip of milk. Sure sounds like your hurt leg is all healed up but you better be careful Nissy, or you will be put on bed rest again. Take care.
ReplyDeleteOn the one paw, we are glad your knee is better but really, a slight hobble would have given you more *milk*.
ReplyDeletethis is great news you're back to your normal self WooHoo,now for lots of fun Nissy,xx Speedy
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome that your knee is so much better, Nerissa... but not so awesome that you unintentionally spilled the beans to your human!
ReplyDeleteOh, no, you forgot to hobble!! Blame Mr. Chipmunk for blowing your cover. On the other paw, we are glad that you are healed up.
ReplyDeleteWell you just has to come up wid somthing else to use on da peeps so them still know your knee is not all well yet. These things take a long time and you have to keep the peeps in line somehow.
ReplyDeleteWe don't think you could ever be a slacker either.
Seriously, Nissy, your humans are sympathy-impaired. They should have been fussing over your poor sore paw, and giving you cream. Lots of cream.
ReplyDeleteNissy I am SO SO glad you are that much better! You can still get sympathy from your mom..trust me.
ReplyDeleteC'mon, you KNOW you can wrap ol Peepers around your little paw with some sad ears and a little peep-y mrrrow. Work it, Buddy!
ReplyDeleteOkay, where should we go first? How 'bowt the Yukon? Should stay light up there for quite awhile, eh?
Nissy, we are glad you've improved so much. Your mom should be sooo much more sympathetic though. Perhaps a hairball yakking is in order here?
ReplyDeleteLooks like your human is a little jealous, indeed!
ReplyDeleteMine does this all the time.
Purrs
It does sound as if the jig is up and there's no more fooling the peeps about the condition of your leg. Just let it go and start doing more and more of the things you missed while you were laid up. Can't wait to see the awards you've received as well as the new one you're developing. Have a great week. Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Josette
ReplyDeleteGreat news Nissy that you are well on the way to recovery but bummer you got caught out. We suggest a bit of post convalescence depression as that may help you milk it for a while longer. Have a marvellous milking it Monday.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes Molly
I've never had milk or cream *sad eyes* So pleased to hear that your leg is improving - tho you may need to get better at hidding this fact from the peeps!
ReplyDeleteNissy you must remember that knee of yours - use it to your best advantage...hobble if you have to - drag it behind you if you need to but USE IT BUDDY....yep - you'll have cream every morning if you look pitiful enough (although I have to say the knee actually is looking quite well!).
ReplyDeleteKitty Hugs, Sammy
I'm so glad your leg is doing better, Nerissa. 50000 hits, that's a lot of hits, we just celebrated our 1000 hits... So you had the couch almost for yourself...MOL...of course you have to stretch out and use the whole area. Looking forward to your milky-way-pawty.. with cream please. Pawkiss ;)
ReplyDeleteOh gosh, use that knee WHENEVER POSSIBLE! A sad-eyed look thrown in every once in a while won't hurt and those cows will be handing over the cream paw-over-hoof! You'll be chin-deep within no time! Purrs....
ReplyDeleteNissy, the first rule of milking-it-for-all-it's-worth is to limp at all times. You never know who's watching! Sheesh! You are obviously a novice at the limping lark! In fact I'm feeling a bit limp myself tonight!! ;)
ReplyDeleteGlad you're doing better though :) xx
Thanks for being such a great Lord Chancellor, nerissa. You know, it is now your duty to take over and Rule Wisely as Simba suggested. You and your Tribe will surely do a better job than those humans!
ReplyDelete50,000 hits!! That is pawsome! APAWS!!
ReplyDelete