How totally undependable! That's right... undependable... TOTALLY! Of course, I'm talking 'bout the peep. Peep #1, to be exact.
A few weeks ago, peep #1 made me a promise. She promised, no more flower shows. I thought she was telling me the truth. I thought I could trust her. I thought that when she gave me her word, she would keep it.
Well, you can imagine my surprise yesterday morning when the peep got up bright and early. Well, it was early. I'm not too sure how bright she was. You know peeps. Anyway, it was earlier than normal for my ol' peep to be getting up.
She was rushing around trying to get stuff done in, if you ask me, a somewhat frazzled state. But the stuff she was doing wasn't the important stuff like washing my plates and serving me my breakkie. No, instead she was making coffee, checking e-mails and getting dressed in a dress. And she was gathering things like a notebook and pen. I thought to myself, this can't be good and, as usual, I was right.
I was staring at her with that cold hard stare we cats have perfected beyond the point of perfection and she must have felt the back of her neck burning from my laser beams beaming right through her 'cause that's when she said it. She said, "Nissy, peep #2 will be up shortly. Peep #2 is going to get you your breakfast this morning. I have to go to a flower show."
Well, those words nearly knocked me right off my paws. Yes, all four of my paws. All four all at once. I felt like I had taken a blow to the head with a big ol' puffer fish or something. I couldn't believe my ears. Flower show? Flower show??? There were to be no more flower shows! I thought that had been decided.
The peep then explained that she wasn't helping to organise this flower show nor was she entering anything in it. She was going to be one of the judges at the show. She said this was completely different from the aforementioned atrocities. I gave her my most doubtful, truly perplexed ears look. Hmmm... I thought. This peep is making stuff up as she talks. She's just making stuff up out of her head!
Well, before I knew it, the peep was out the door and I was left to my own devices. I sat there, in the middle of the kitchen floor, barely noticing when peep #2 arrived, asking what I'd like for my breakkie. I was in a state of shock, I suppose. I barely even remember eating my breakkies although they must have been good 'cause apparently, I cleaned the plate right up.
I was still sitting there when peep #1 arrived home. Okay, I actually had quite a busy day in between filled with naps and grooming and naps and exploring and more naps but when I heard her car pull into the driveway, I made a bee-line for the kitchen and posed exactly where she had seen me last. We cats have the give-the-ol'-peeps-the-guilt-trip down pat, you know. Wanted to give her the impression I had been pining all day for her. Pining accompanied with grave indifference, of course. It worked, I think.
Worst thing was, the ol' peep seemed to have enjoyed judging the flower show. She said the flowers were all super pretty. She was raving on and on and on about some kind of stinky old roses. Okay, she didn't say stinky. She said beautifully fragrant. I was translating there. Anyway, I'm thinking she'll be planting some of those stinky roses in my garden next summer 'cause the peep would simply not stop blathering on about them.
What I'd like to know is this.... where's the nip? Shouldn't flower shows have nip? If you're gonna go judge a flower show, ol' peep of mine, make sure there are some classes for nip, okay? And there should be samples of the nip to bring home, I should think. Bring home for us cats... not peeps. I mean, isn't nip the the most important kind of flower in the whole wide world? In the entire universe, perhaps? I should think so! MOUSES! Don't peeps know anything?
I totally agree with you! Nip should be a part of everything of course!!!
ReplyDeleteevidently not Nerissa,Oh dear you poor thing left all on your own with not to give you breakkie and cuddles poor baby boy*Speedy's mum is give you a ear scratch*
ReplyDeleteThat was very rude of the Peep not to bring home some great and fresh nip for that kitty. That Peep was very norty. She needs some punishment for sure. Hope all of you have a great day.
ReplyDeleteNo brekkie, neglected, no nip! No presents for you. What is the world coming to?
ReplyDeleteLuv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
The only kind of flowers I care about are nip flowers - your human should be judging the fragrance of THOSE!
ReplyDeleteIf there were Nip at the show, shouldn't YOU be the judge?
ReplyDeleteNo flower show is good enough unless there is nip.
ReplyDeleteThe TEMERITY of Peep #1 to lie like that is truly awful. We wonder, in a sick sort of way, just how low she'll sink?
ReplyDeleteGeeeesh - I don't know about this breed called humans! They certainly are different. #1 she has some nerve running off for the entire day and leaving you behind. #2 She should have at least stopped and found some nip for you as a reward. I'd put my paw down with her pal - you don't want her doing a repeat performance in a week.
ReplyDeleteI tried to grow nip in the house, didn't turn out well......
ReplyDeleteTruly, they just can't be trusted, furriends.
ReplyDeleteNope they don't...and what they also don't know is that the FIRST "peep" up is the "peep" who is supposed to feed breakfast...I don't care where she had to go!
ReplyDeleteCan't believe she walked OUT OF THE DOOR with you sitting there with NO BREAKFAST...........travesty
Actually, nip should be at every kind of show.....as hair decoration at fashion show, as book marker at book shows......
ReplyDeleteNip is our favorite flower. And if we were judging, it would win 1st prize everytime!!
ReplyDeleteThe back of disrespect is always a option! BTW mes gots your wonderful award this week! Me thinks yous invented the bestest!
ReplyDeleteKisses
Nellie
Ha ha ha ha ha! My Human was actually LAUGHING when she read about this travesty of promises cheaply made and thoughtlessly broken! *I* on the other hand see it for the tragedy it is--the loss of a Kitteh's FAITH in his Peep. That is a sad thing, Nerissa. (But wait--honestly, how much faith did you really even have left to lose? Hmmmm.)
ReplyDeleteA few lines that especially appealed to the Human were these:
This peep is making stuff up as she talks. She's just making stuff up out of her head!
This is what came to the Human in a moment of blinding realization in about her fifth year of teaching, when she finally understood that all those teachers and professors she'd been listening to for lo, the 17 oe 18 years of her formal education were just like her, blathering on endlessly as if they actually knew ==or worse, cared--about what they were talking about! Half the time they were thinking about what happened to J.R. and SueEllen on Dallas last night, or whether their dry cleaning would be ready after school, or what they might make for dinner.
She's never really been the same.
Hey Nerissa,
ReplyDeleteHmm...no breakfast and no nip? Come live with me. har har har *evil laughs*
Oh Nerissa....I feel your pain....just when we think we have a total understanding with our human - WHAMMO - they throw us the old curve ball. Looks like your peep's involvement with the flower shows will go on and on. Best get used to it. As long as your OTHER peep continues to feed you in her absence...well....I suppose you can excuse the occasional indiscretion right? We ARE after all superior beings and capable of forgiveness. I totally agree with you about the lack of "vision" with regards to NOT having a "CATNIP DIVISION" at the flower show. What's with that? There are perfectly lovely flowers on catnip plants!
ReplyDeleteKitty Hugs, Your Understanding Pal Sammy
I don't think humans quite "get" catnip. They're all about tulips and big showy flowers.
ReplyDeleteA flower show without nip???? What are peeps like? They’re one petal short of a bloom for sure!!
ReplyDeleteWhat is the point of flower shows if there isn't any nip?
ReplyDeleteNerissa, we forgot to say how beautiful that picture is of you standing proudly amongst the trees and flowers!
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't see any reason whatsoever for her not to shower you with fresh nip now.
ReplyDeleteANOTHER FLOWER SHOW? How many times do they have to show yer Mom what "flowers" are before she catches on? Is she remedial ("Srsly fergetful")? We mean, really, OUR Bein is kinna slow, but even HE knows what flowers are.
ReplyDeletewow! I think maybe you outta get your #1 peep back into training...mine don't do that kinda stuff...ya know...tell untruths...maybe a good whack along side the head could help until you can get her back into training...or try a choke chain, I hear they work wonders on canines so they outta work great on peeps too...just a thought...tryin' to help out a pal...paw pats Savannah
ReplyDeleteI left a comment on this post and the one before it but not sure they posted...lemme know if ya can. thanks lots
ReplyDeleteDo you think it's worth seeing if there's a system upgrade for humans? Maybe if you installed peep 2.0 things'd go better... Hrm....
ReplyDelete