don't even think it

Don't even think it, Peepers.  Don't even think it!  Don't you dare even THINK about thinkin' it.

MOUSES!

Some guy way back when, writes a book about a cat wearin' a hat, and the next thing you know...

DON'T EVEN THINK IT!

What?  What?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?

YOU KNOW PERFECTLY WELL WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT.

MOUSES!

Peepers, I saw what you were doin'.  I saw you with my very own eyes.  I saw you knittin' that hat.

Right off the bat I knew it was trouble.

Okay, truth be told, right off the bat, I thought it was stupid.  I mean, why knit a hat when you could be puttin' your knittin' skills to good use?  You know, by knittin' up a nip mouse or somethin' like that.

MOUSES!

But then it occurred to me, not only was a hat knittin' exercise stupid, but it was downright dangerous, too.  Dangerous to any and all nearby cats.

What?  What?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?

Don't play innocent with me, you...

You...

YOU...

You needle-wieldin', yarn-totin', knittin'-lovin' PEEP.

I know what you're up to, Peepers.  I know what you're plannin'.  Once you finish knittin' that hat, you're gonna be lookin' for some fool to wear it. Some poor, unsuspectin' foolish sucker like me.

Wait a minute.  That came out TOTALLY wrong.

I mean...

Once you finish knittin' that hat, you're gonna be lookin' for some handsome mancat to model it for you.

WELL THINK AGAIN PEEPERS, 'CAUSE NO WAY, NO HOW, WILL YOU SEE ME WEARIN' THAT HAT.

MOUSES!

I'm tellin' you, peeps think they can get away with anythin'.  They think we cats haven't figured them out. Well they need to rethink that idea, for sure, for I, Seville the Cat, know ALL ABOUT my peep's devious ways and...

What?  What?  What's that you're babblin' on about NOW?

You are?

It is?

Well I'll be...

Imagine that.

Apparently, although the peep is knittin' a hat, the hat is not for me.  In fact, it isn't even for any cat. She's actually knittin' it for some peep.

MOUSES!

Imagine the peep havin' the gall to knit somethin' that ISN'T for me.

I don't know if I should feel relieved or insulted.

I think...

I think I should be feelin' relieved AND a little insulted as well.

I think...

I think the peep should quit knittin' stupid hats and get on with more important things. Important things like knittin' some nip mice for me.

MOUSES!