Good grief, GET A ROOM, you two. Get a room!
Yeah, yeah... I know you love Peepers, Saffron. I know you're always snugglin' up to her and purrin' and givin' her head bonks and stuff. AND I KNOW she loves you, too. I know she's always kissin' the top of your head and rubbin' your tummy and givin' you chin tickles. I know!
But she loves me, too, Saffy, my man. I'm her handsome marmalade mancat, you see, AND I HAVE BEEN for many a year. Peepers loves me, too. I just don't make such a spectacle of myself showin' her how much I love her all the time, like you.
Okay, so maybe I do.
But a word to the wise, Saffy Saffron Sassifras: With peeps, it is to your advantage to play hard to get. Ever hear about that?
Then how come you behave like you do?
I'm gonna tell you this just the once, Saffron: A kitty who plays hard to get gets EXTRA cuddles and chin tickles and things.
Okay, I can do without the cuddles so maybe extra cuddles might be a bad thing, but...
But one can never get too many scritches to the chin.
Saffy, next time Peepers is givin' you chin tickles and behind the ear scritches, don't start purrin' too soon. 'Cause once you start to purr, peeps have a tendency to stop with the scritches. It's like your purrin' is their goal and once that goal has been reached, they think they can stop with the scritches.
Peeps are like that, you see.
So if you want lots and lots of scritches, it's best to hold out on the purrs. Hold out on 'em for as long as you can. I know that can be hard to do, but the more you hold out, the more scritches you will get, to be sure.
But as for the cuddles...
As for the cuddles, once Peepers starts pickin' you up and givin' you cuddles and slobberin' all over the top of your head with kisses...
Run like the dickens, my friend, lest you get peep cooties from her, or somethin' like that.
Somethin' like fleas.