CLEANUP ON AISLE THREE.
What a mess, Peepers. What a mess! And yeah, the mess is ALL YOUR mess, for sure.
Well it certainly isn't mine.
BOTTLENECK ON HIGHWAY ONE.
Traffic is horrible out there. Absolutely horrible! That ol' information highway is congested from here to there to just about everywhere. And yeah, Peepers, the congestion is all on account of you.
Well it's certainly not on account of me.
Peepers, you need to do something 'bout these problems we're havin' and you need to do somethin' right now. My incomin' mail is bein' sent back to the senders all on account of problems YOU went and caused.
Did you hear that, Peepers? DID YOU HEAR? MY. MAIL. IS BEIN'. SENT. BACK. ON ACCOUNT. OF YOU.
And that, dear peep, will simply not do.
And another thing, I...
What? What's that? What's that you're babblin' on about now?
You did not get spammed. You wouldn't know spam if a tin of the processed meaty stuff hit you upside of the head.
Okay, so that's a different kinda spam, but you get the message, I am sure.
And ANOTHER thing, I...
What? What's that? What that you're babblin' on about NOW?
No, Peepers. NO. Once again, I will repeat that this has nothin' to do with nothing 'bout spam; processed and tinned, or not. This here problem is all on account of your not doin' your peep-like duties and cleanin' out our e-mails once read and deleted, and...
Well are you or are you not my IT guy?
Guy... Gal... Whatever.
WELL I KNOW YOU'RE NOT ANY GOOD AT IT. But you're all I've got, Peepers. I don't have a proper IT peep so I have to make do. You know, make do with you. I...
Lookie here, Peepers. I can't be wastin' my time dealin' with these used up e-mails. I read 'em and deleted 'em and now YOU need to delete 'em from the files of deletions; 'cause there's so much clutter in there that my new e-mails are bein' sent back to senders on account of there bein' not enough room for 'em to be squeezed in, and... And... And...
'CAUSE THERE ARE THREE WHOLE MONTHS OF DELETED E-MAILS IN THERE!
What do you mean I should take care of 'em, myself? I don't have time for crappy jobs like that. I, Seville the Cat, have more important things to do.
LIKE TAKIN' A REALLY NICE LONG NAP, that's what.
Wake me up when you're done.
I seriously need better help.
Remember to mask up, too.