they'll call back

Oh hey there, Peepers.  That was the phone for you.

"Who called?"

I don't know.

"But you know it was for me so you must have answered it, then."

Yeah, but I don't know who it was.  They asked for you and I said. Sorry, she's not here.  Call back later.

"Seville, why didn't you take a message?"

Do I look like your personal answerin' service, Peepers?  DO I?  *holds up a paw*  Don't bother answerin' that question, ol' peep of mine.  It was a rhetorical question, you see.  MOUSES!

"Seville...  Seville, I fail to see why you couldn't have simply asked who it was on the phone.  How am I supposed to return their call?"

You don't have to!  Return their call, I mean.  That's the beauty of my system, you see.  If it's important, they'll call back.  If they don't call back, it wasn't important.  Either way, you don't have to do a thing.

"But..."

But, schmut.  And what's even better is: not only do you not have to do anythin'; neither do I.  I don't have to take a message, I mean.  Brilliant, right?  Right.  MOUSES!

"Seville, if you went to the trouble of getting up and answering the phone, why couldn't you have at least asked who was calling?"

Peepers, that's about the silliest question I've ever heard.  I had to answer the phone in case the call was for me.  I wouldn't want to miss any important calls.  Wouldn't want that, at all.  I'm a very important cat, you see, and phone calls for me are BOUND to be important, for sure.  But just because I have the time to answer MY calls, that doesn't mean I have the time to answer yours, as well.

"But you had the time to answer the phone in the first place, so..."

For me.

"What?"

 

Try to keep up there, Peepers.  I had the time to answer the phone for ME.  I did not have time to waste, answerin' the phone for you.  Like I asked before, do I look like your personal answerin' service?  DO I?  *holds up paw*  Again, don't bother answerin'.  It's still a rhetorical question.

"Seville..."

Rhetorical.  It means a question asked to make a point.  Or maybe to make some kinda dramatic effect.  It's not meant to evoke an answer, or...

"I know what a rhetorical question is, Seville."

Do you really?  Hmmm...  Verdict is out on that, I think.

*throws arms up in exasperation*  "Seville, if whomever it was calls back, this time take a message, please."

You see, there, Peepers?  It's just as I thought: you really don't know what a rhetorical question is, at all.  If you did, you'd know I'm NOT your personal answerin' service, and therefore I will not be takin' a message if that guy or gal calls back, and...

"You don't even know if it was a man or a woman?"

*scratches behind an ear*  It was woman with a deep voice, I think.  Or maybe a man with a high voice.  Or maybe...

"Oh never mind."

Now THAT'S the spirit, Peepers.  As I said before.  If it's important, they'll call back.  If it's not, they won't.  Either way, I. DON'T. MIND.

MOUSES!

Oh, and Peepers?

"Yes?"

Phone rang for you earlier, too.  Couple times this mornin', in fact.  Thought you'd wanna know.

And don't worry, if it's important, I'm sure they'll call back.

Maybe.

MOUSES!

***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.