Wednesday 24 October 2018

Oh Peepers...

Oh Pee-pers...

OH PEEEE-PERRRS....

Not answerin', huh?

Hey, PEEPERS!

Ah...  Here she comes now.

MOUSES!

So Peepers, I, Seville the Cat, was just sittin' here in the family room, thinkin' to myself how I was feelin' somewhat uh...  Peckish.  Yeah, peckish is exactly how I feel.  You think you could go get me a treat?

Well that was rude.  That ol' peep of mine just spun on her heels, and walked right out of the room.

MOUSES!

Oh, I know.  I bet she's DESPERATE to get me those treats as fast as she can.  I bet she was in such a hurry, she didn't even have time to tell me what she was doin'.  Bet she'll be right back with my treats, lickety-split.

Hmmm...  It's been like four minutes and she's not yet back with my treats.

MOUSES!

Oh Pee-pers...

OH PEEEE-PERRRS...

WHERE ARE WE ON GETTIN' THOSE TREATS?

She's not answerin' me again.  I'll wait another minute.

Okay, so I'll give her two.  Two minutes, that is.

You know, I'm startin' to think the peep isn't gettin' me my treats.

MOUSES!

Andy, you wanna go check in on the peep?  See if she's gettin' my treats ready?  See if maybe she's havin' a tough time openin' a new package or somethin' like that?

Because.  Because I'm far too weak from hunger to get up and walk those ten steps into the kitchen, myself.  That's why.  Whereas you, brother dear...  Well you could use the exercise, for sure.

MOUSES!

FINE.  But don't expect me to ask her to bring you treats, too.  You'll have to do that, yourself.

MOUSES!

Oh there you are, Peepers.  FINALLY.  I was beginnin' to think you might have gotten lost, or somethin', between here and the kitchen.  You know, 'cause it IS a whole ten steps.

MOUSES!

So uh...  So did you bring me some treats?

What?  No treats?  But...

But...

But...

BUT WHY?

What do you MEAN my treats are out in the kitchen if I want 'em?  OF COURSE I want 'em.  That's why I asked you to go get 'em in the first place!  And you expect me to get up and walk ALL THAT WAY, myself?  WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

Seriously, what do you mean?  I'm not likin' where this conversation is goin', Peepers.  I'm used to havin' you wait on me, paw and paw.  I'm NOT used to havin' to go...  FORAGE  for my treats, like some kinda animal.   Or one of those peep foragers one sees on television these days.  I'm USED to havin' you show me the respect I deserve...

Scratch that.  I seem to remember my coughin' up a hairball, this mornin', near...

Okay, so it was actually more like IN the shoe, but still...

I'm USED to havin' you show me MORE respect than I may or may not deserve, and...

What, AGAIN with the spinnin' on your heels and walkin' out of the room bit?  And while I, Seville the Cat, am talkin' to you, no less?

AND STILL, NO PAW-DELIVERED TREATS.

MOUSES!

Boy-oh-boy, what IS this world comin' to with peeps not behavin' like peeps should?  Peeps behavin' like...  Like...  Like unsophisticated, uncultured, uncouth, heathenish SWINE.

I mean, it's bad enough I'm not bein' served my meals on the good china and crystal, but now I don't even get room service?

MOUSES!

Andy, and just where to do you think YOU'RE goin', huh?

You're WHAT?  You're goin' into the kitchen to go eat MY treats?

MY TREATS?

Well, there's only one thing for it then.

OUTTA MY WAY!  I'M COMIN' THROUGH.  FOR I'M ON A MISSION TO GET ME MY TREATS.

MOUSES!


9 comments:

  1. Peep are do hard to understand, especially the ones lacking treats!

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  2. That Peep if yours sure causes you a lot of trouble, eh Sivvers?

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  3. You can't leave treats unattended around here either!

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  4. Hmm, sounds like the staff need a good ticking off! OK, strike that as ticks are really very nasty. Maybe a flea-ing off. OK not sure that is word but a good flea-ing should do, maybe in the ear, a small one. Yup one in the ear should do it. If that fails, maybe get Uber Eats to deliver for you?
    Purrs
    ERin

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  5. Seville, it's a rough life for a house kitty these days...

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  6. Maybe your mum is stashing those treats for the lil' humans that come to doors on All Hallows Eve? Hmm... I best go see if my mom might be stashing some. Tummy tickles. -Valentine (& Mom) of Noir Kitty Mews

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  7. How dare she not deliver them on a silver platter with a nip garnish. XO

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I love hearin' from my pals. I really, REALLY do. PURRS.