That's right... it's time for a new word and that word is catgregation.
I'm sure you've all heard of the word congregation before. A collection or assemblage of peeps in a crowd or mass. But what if those congregatin' peeps aren't peeps? What if they're cats? Well then, you've got yourself a catgregation, for sure.
A catgregation should not be confused with a clowder. A clowder is a group of cats. For example, I live in a clowder 'cause there are twelve of us cats. We all live in the same house, play in the same garden and rule the same peeps. We're a clowder simply because we are a group... a group of cats. We can all be doin' different things throughout the house but we're still part of the same group... or clowder.
In a catgregation however, there is always a purpose to our catgregating. For instance, when a peep opens a tin of the Fancy Feast, we cats of the clowder tend to catgregrate in the kitchen, in and around the peep in question's feet, forming a catgregation. We're all there for the single purpose of gettin' our paws on that Fancy Feast. Some of us come from upstairs while some of us come from the family room and some might even come from outside but we all gather for the same reason and in doin' so, we form a catgregation.
A catgregation can be big or little. In my house, when we cats catgregate, the catgregation is relatively small. I mean... twelve is a lot but it's nothin' compared to what it could be. It's nothin' compared to the catgregations found at Catgress.
What's that? You say you've never of Catgress? Oh my... I thought everyone knew 'bout Catgress.
Catgress is a catgregation of the most intelligent of cats. Now, the thing about us cats is that we're all highly intelligent... 'cause we're cats. That means we're all qualified to attend Catgress. That's right... each and every one of us.
Catgresses are usually held on a local level because most of us don't drive. Most cats have to come from within walkin' distance. A Catgress might be held in a park or a large garden. Perhaps even on a neighbour's back porch. But when the cats gather to discuss the great mysteries of life, Catgress is in session.
Peeps are often unaware of Catgress. Some of them might suspect somethin' is up but they're never really able to figure it out. You'll hear peeps calling their cats off in the distance... "Smokey... Willow... Snookums..." Those peeps are wonderin' where their cats are. They've looked high and they've looked low. They've looked in cupboards and under beds. They've looked under chairs and on top of cabinets. They've looked just about everywhere, to no avail. Well my friends, that's 'cause their cats are catgregants at Catgress.
Typically, Catgress is held at either dawn or dusk. Your regular run-of-the-mill catgregation may form at any time of day or night.
Catgresses also tend to be a little louder than catgregations. This is probably due to the fact that the catgregants forming an ordinary catgregation usually know each other well. Often they hold the same political beliefs and whatnot. At Catgress, however, you've got cats comin' from all over the place and let me tell you, some of them have some pretty wacky ideas.
I once heard of this one catgregant at a Catgress who thought cat grass should be made illegal. He was one very confused cat. The ensuing yowls and howls could have been heard for miles and awakened the dead or something. And they would have, too, except fortuitously, at the very same time as this particular Catgress was in session, there was an opera goin' on across the street. Let's just say, some things are more ear piercing than a cat fight at Catgress.
So to any peeps readin' this blog post, next time you see a group of cats gatherin', ask yourself this... is that simply a catgregation or is it Catgress? And if it is Catgress, you might very well wonder what discussions are on the agenda that night. You might wonder, indeed. And you'll be kept wondering 'cause we cats never divulge the secrets of Catgress. Unless, of course, it makes for a good story.